Insincerity

Ahh…

Did I go too far?

A part of me had been hoping that she would chase me, hug me, and keep me from going further…

But even as I purposely walked slower for the first 2 milliseconds, I didn't experience that cliché scene of being stopped by a heartfelt back hug by the love interest after trying to leave.

As my heart lost hope, my feet ran quicker and quicker, at a pace far faster than I could ever imagine.

Before I knew it, the tears of indignation that I've kept in all this time flowed out freely like a waterfall… yet…

Yet, where is Lancera?!

That stupid, idiot Hall brat.

Where is she?

Why isn't she here yet?

Why isn't she chasing after me?

Why?

WHY?

Could…

Could it be that she truly does not like me?!

Even after saying so much?

Even after following me around for so many years?

Even after proclaiming her love for me every single day?

Hah.

But indeed. How much can mere words truly account for?

At least destroy my feelings for you before you leave me…

Seeing the blur of trees I ran past, I felt dizzy with déjà vu.

Something… Something like this has happened before, hasn't it?

5 years ago.

Back when I was 11 years old, and when the crown prince was 19.

My parents and his royal majesty had spoken of engagement between his imperial majesty's eldest son, who had just become of age, and me.

In my memory, the crown prince was a kind and handsome person, just like those cool princes who rode snow-white horses to save the damsels in distress.

He always brought me flowers, little souvenirs from his travels, and never forgot to tell me how beautiful, intelligent, and mature I was.

I didn't really understand what love was at the time, and I'm sure that I didn't feel those affections towards the prince, but I still happily accepted the engagement proposal, thinking that it wouldn't be bad to have such a husband.

Besides, as the future empress, I would undoubtedly hold a lot of power and have a lot of influence. Doesn't that just set the stage for the tons of compliments and worship that I would receive?

But one day, when I was planning to surprise the prince with a secret visit (I got this trashy idea from my romantic mother), bringing cookies(that my mother baked because my batch failed), I saw something I believe I shouldn't have seen.

The prince's bedroom was located in the royal family's wing of the palace that was heavily guarded. But the guards only stood at the entrance of the hall and didn't guard right outside each and every room save for his majesty's bed-chamber, which was located in another wing.

On that particular day, I had gained access to the wing that the prince's room was located in, and I noticed that the door to the room was slightly open.

Out of curiosity, I sneakily peeked inside, with my eyes widening at the scene before me.

"Cas (the crown prince's nickname), mm… ahh…! Hey! Wait a sec…"

"Mar… why do I need to wait?"

"Mmm! That little girl from the Claremonts… didn't father say that she'll be visiting?"

"Hmm, it's not like she can do anything anyway." Cas chuckled. "She's a pretty little thing, but she'll never be as beautiful as you, my beautiful sister… besides, her naivety surpasses her beauty; just because of some words I said, she actually thinks I'm infatuated with her."

After a moment, he continued suggestively, "I doubt that she'll even understand the meaning of what we're doing, Mar, even if she sees us…"

His companion chortled and threw her fair white arms around him.

Prince Caspian and Princess Margaret. The most famous pair of siblings in the kingdom of Loen.

And it's because of them that I've grown to hate insincerity.