Cara

Oh no! He found me! What was I going to do? I had to get my baby out of there. I couldn't let him have it. I began to scramble for the door, but I was so weak and disoriented that I couldn't get to my feet.

"Wait," he called out. He sounded different, but I had to get away, I couldn't let him catch us. "Hey! Wait! Are you okay?"

What? He wanted to know if I was okay? It had to be some sort of trick.

No, keep running.

Except I wasn't running, I was falling over sweaters, my feet were all tangled up, and I was desperately trying not to drop my baby.

And then he had me, his hands were on my shoulders and he was talking to me, but I didn't hear him, my heart was pounding too loudly in my ears.

"No, NO!" I was screaming and kicking, but it was no use, he was so much stronger than me.

He was always stronger than me.

"Lady, look at me," I heard him say. "I'm not going to hurt you!"

That voice… That wasn't his voice. His voice was much more gruff and raspy. And evil. This voice sounded sincere. Young.

"What?" I looked up at him. It wasn't him. This man was taller. Much taller. I looked into his eyes. They looked…kind.

"Who are you?" I asked, still afraid that he might be friends with the monster I had escaped from.

"My name is Beck, I own this store." It sounded like it could be the truth, but how could I know for sure?

"You're safe, please calm down, I'm not going to hurt you." He looked down at my bundle, "Or your baby."

Then I looked down at my bundle. It was screaming now. "Oh, baby, shh, it's ok." I sank back down to the floor and lifted my shirt again to nurse, "Shh, I'm here."

We sat in silence for a moment while my baby fed. I looked up at the man skeptically.

"Beck," I tested the name on my lips. I had never heard it before, but that didn't mean I could trust him.

"Yeah," he looked at me kind of awkwardly, as if he wasn't sure if he should look away or not. "Can… Can I ask who you are?"

I stared at him for a moment. He really seemed to have no idea who I was or what I was doing there. I still didn't trust him, but I needed help. I didn't know where I was or what I was going to do next. It was a miracle I had gotten this far on my own. "I'm Cara."

"Cara," he said. "Okay, Cara." Then he was silent for a moment. "What's your baby's name?" He gestured to my little nursing bundle.

"I don't know yet. I haven't had time to think of one." It was the truth. Come to think of it, I hadn't even looked to see what it was.

I had labored in the dark, alone, on the run. I didn't take the time to look at the gender, I had just bit off the cord, and kept running. I pulled the rags away so that I could look. The little body was covered in blood from the cord sticking out of the belly button. There was a huge knot in it where I tied it off to stop the bleeding. But, beneath the blood, even in the dark of the night I could see it.

My eyes filled with tears and I laughed. "A boy." I looked up at Beck. "I have a baby boy!"

I looked back at my bundle, my little boy. Wiping the tears from my eyes, I really looked at him for the first time. Is this what real happiness feels like? He was beautiful. He had dark hair, there wasn't a lot of it, and it was still matted down with dried goop from inside of me, but there was enough to show a full hairline. His eyes were closed as he suckled, and his nose was squished against my breast. His little lips looked perfect and pink. His ear was a perfect little swirl.

How could he be so wonderful? He was the product of something terrible, yet he was perfect. I couldn't take my eyes off him. The rest of the world melted away and we were in our own blissful little bubble.

And then, our bubble popped.

"Cara," I looked up to see Beck, but now there was someone else with him. A woman. "This is Jess. She's my friend, you can trust her."

I still don't trust you, Beck, I thought.

Jess got down on her knees a few feet from me. "Hey Sweetie, can we take you to a hospital?"

Panic gripped my throat. This is why I can't trust people. People will get us in trouble.

"No, he'll find me there!"

She looked up at Beck and he shrugged his shoulders. "She thought I was someone else when I found her. She fought like hell to get away."

Jess looked back at me. "Who is 'he', honey?"

I stared at her silently. I could feel the fear radiating out of me.

"My god, Beck, she's scared to death." She inched closer to me and I shied away. "Sweetie, don't worry, okay? Whoever he is," she paused and looked at my baby. "Whatever he's done to you, we won't let him get near you. But we need to get you to a hospital."

"No," I said. I felt the butter sting of tears behind my eyes. "He knows I had the baby, he'll be looking in hospitals!" My breathing became heavy and I could feel myself begin to sweat. "If you try to take me I'll run."

"Okay," it was Beck this time. "We won't take you anywhere, alright? But at least let us look you over in the light and make sure you're okay."

Jess gave him a concerned look.

"What," he said to her. "We can't just leave her here."

"But we don't know anything about babies, or mothers, or labor," she argued.

"No, but we can't force her to go to a hospital, and we can't leave her here." He looked back at me, "Whadya say?"

I could feel the sweat stinging the cut on my hip. "Okay," I agreed.

"Okay," Jess said as she threw her hands up, defeated. "Welcome to the Beck and Jess clinic."