"Napoleon Rouen's second landing at the West India Docks? Possible French spy presence!"
"Explosive news! The Regency Crescent witnesses the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon Bonaparte captured once again!"
"In this scorching summer, Scotland Yard brings to the great people of Britain a magnificent military triumph!"
"Londoners joke: The fighting prowess of the London Police is on par with the Royal Guard Grenadiers; perhaps Parliament could consider a modest reduction in the Army's budget"
"Just having succeeded his father as Earl of Dundonald and ascended to the House of Lords, Royal Navy Rear Admiral Thomas Cochrane expressed exuberantly: The suggestion by the citizens of London is very forward-thinking"
"Army Ministry's response: Cochrane, go fart elsewhere!"