Culture Lesson on Touch part 2

I laughed, "Don't worry. We are all taught that your culture does not follow this greeting. However, many of my people are loyal and stubborn. We are told about hugs specifically. That humans hug a lot and it is similar to poking torsos. We are told regularly and it is one of the questions on the tests required to be correct for crossing. So everyone knows it.

"A forever partner is not just a partner like it is for a human. Our partnerships cannot be changed unless the other dies. For our kind, it is… sacred. If you hug someone, they may be flattered instead of offended. If they hug you they are probably going by your culture of rules." I smile at her to ease her mind. Yet the tall woman seems to be gloomier now.

"What if… that doesn't seem to be the case?" She hesitates.

Does she have an admirer? That's impressive. They will want to love her despite her overwhelming chest. For most of my people that would turn many people away. Many of my peers disdained even being on casual terms with human females. I thought about it. "Well… sending a love note without writing a name?"

"Humans find solace in physical connection when their emotions are high. What about hugging when upset?"

I made a face. "Um…" I hesitated. "I'd need more context."

They seemed to understand. It was difficult to judge a force that did not naturally exist in their world. The crosser could be discounting it all together. This was a common practice in crosser and human interactions.

"What you said about poking the stomach earlier." I nodded to urge her to continue, "You offer a hand, they poke your stomach, the next time you offer a hand, then what?"

"If you change the place you touch even by an inch every meeting it means you are still feeling out where you want each other in your life. This would be common practice.

"If you offer your hand again after they've offered more it's considered impolite and breaking a strict line for current and future relations." I answered, "It would be best not to offer your hand again but to touch their arm or shoulder the next time you meet. It's not turning them down cold, nor is it accepting their sudden proposal. And then the idea would be to get to the tummy-poking stage. Or to slowly move back towards their hand. It's polite to meet halfway in the beginning and then slowly distance yourself again. If you meet halfway: at the second meeting and touch their arm, they will either reciprocate or move to your shoulder. This is just letting you know that they still want to be close to you. If you move closer to their hand in the next meeting it is a polite rejection. If you move a little closer to the shoulder it means you will continue to get closer and get to know one another.

"If they keep poking your stomach it's like intruding on an acquaintance's house and rummaging through his fridge as if it's your own. This is usually a benefit reserved for close friends and family.

"If they hug you every time…" I cringed, "It's like sticking your tongue down someone's throat or raping them. Depending on where you touch."

She hesitated, "What if… it's not every time?"

"Like they will usually meet halfway and occasionally touch further?"

She nodded. Her expression was still stern and still eyes evil looking. Her hands clasped together until white showed her nervousness. She was sort of cute.

"That's normal." I shrugged.

Her brows jumped.

"It means they aren't willing to give up." I thought for a moment to relate it to human terms. "If it's every time or almost every time it would be rude. If it is occasionally or hesitant it's like sending a girl flowers every day. It's very polite and you should be flattered. Are you able to meet them privately? You must be close. It means you are a very attractive and desirable woman."

She shook her head, "that's the thing. We meet privately, but he goes out of his way to hug me in public."

This time it was my turn for my brows to jump. "What? Are you sure?"

The other doctor nodded. "Everyone knows the rumors."

"Crossers give me weird looks every time I interact with them. Eccentrics snack my ass…" She frowned.

My dark eyes widen and energy begins to leak.

She nodded, "They look at me like that."

I cleared my throat and imagined myself in a toddler's costume dress again. Costume dresses are held together with velcro. I have to be careful not to tear the velcro. I have to hold it in. I could already feel the familiar ache and pin pricks again.

My muscles and bones were softening. Any more and my organs would be damaged. I got up and pulled a bottle out of a cabinet. It was a D-1 potion I'd diluted ahead of time. I took a swig to heal my muscles again and returned it. I sat back down. "Excuse me."

"Is it that surprising? I've asked before, but he nor the eccentrics are willing to tell me. The autos aren't willing to talk to me."

The man cleared his throat.

"The aces. I mean." she stiffly corrected herself. It was apparent she didn't do this a lot.

I smiled. She must have loosened up a lot with me to use a derogatory word for some of the crossers in front of me. The automatons are those who don't like humans and strictly follow the book. The type the male doctor was talking about would sacrifice the human to save themself. They believe they are better than humans. As for me, I would probably fit into the eccentrics category.

"First I'd like to confirm. You do not have to answer. Greetings are personal and do not have to be shared." She nodded, "You are saying that this crosser has shown a willingness to back off when you draw a line, but will still occasionally go out of his way to hug you in front of other crossers? You have rejected his advances?"

"Yes." She continued, "He doesn't seem to be trying to be rude. Nor conforming to human standards of physical contact."

"Was his first hug in private?"

She had to think about it. I took another bite of the roll cake I hadn't been able to finish.

"Yes."

My eyes softened. What an amazing love story. The person who loves her is so selfless. It was a little sad. "There is no need to do anything."

Her jaw tightened. She obviously wasn't satisfied with my answer.

It was the truth.

"You are correct. It is neither of those." I took another sip of the tea to distract myself from my memories.

"Then what?" She ground her teeth impatiently.

I considered not answering her. Perhaps it would be for the best. I looked into her eyes. Impatience, anger, and fear were being held back. Behind her hard exterior, there was a trace of worry. It isn't that she doesn't care about the crosser. I nodded, "You should know how important our partner is. Even if we end up with a human, divorce is not an option for us. We are bound for life."

"So he wants to be my partner."

I shook my head, "He's already given up on that."