Chapter 3: "as we meet"

*trigger warning, this scene contains lots of anger that might trigger you please read at your sake"*

*song recommendation for this is gimme love by Joji*

"Analia Rodriguez? Hi what made you come today? Our schedule is tomorrow right?" Dr. Jardal Melendrez was confused. "Uhm yes doc but I just wanna tell you some things, are you free?" "Well yes, you came a little early" so we entered a little room where we were last time. So we sat "so what is it?" "the last time I was here was that our 11th session right?" he was more confused "no dear this is the second time, the first was when you run in the middle of the session. I thought you weren't gonna come anymore haha" "I thought we we're done like the usual but" "what? The usual? Okay let's sort things okay?" and I just nod and I look at Azure at the back and he smile "oh is this the part that I go out?" then I smile "no just stay, I'm gonna start okay? So 6 years has passed after my sister's death and I was in more pain. I always wished she can die for hurting me but when it came I felt regret which I shouldn't. It was unfair she can fully rest from all of this madness while I have to deal with it. After a month her death I cheated on my boyfriend with our boss. I thought it could take away a little of my pain but it didn't, it made it worst. After my boyfriend found out he despise me to the bone and everyday he would tell me that for 2 years. I thought, okay I deserve that I didn't know I wasn't only destroying Levin the man I love but also my boss's family. I was a fucked up" tears started to fall. "So I run and went to Raul, my sister's dad. He hates me, everything about me because I was a mistake; I was mom's bastard daughter. I went back to blame him for everything, what was going on me cause it was him who put me in this situation. I messed his cabin until I was tired and run to I do not where." I sob. "is living this hard? Am I hard to love? Then after that my boss found me and told me to just forget everything and get back to work. So I did, because I have to pay for what I have done but my boss told me to just work hard because I have to feed myself and live I was just young and that made me rethink life and so I went to rehab and sessions with you doc. My boss was like a father to me that I screwed him again. I misunderstood him and I offered him sex but he refuses and told me he was starting a fresh start for his family and he only sees me as one of his daughter but I was angry again so I became self harm so I was admitted to your clinic and I was going well for 3 years and that day on my 11th session with you being discharge and sober I dreamt of my sister asking for help and so I went to you crying for dream hypnosis and so you did then when I woke up I was back on 2018. Six years back time and now I'm here." And the room filled with silent and sobs. "Wow that was, hey are you thirsty? Or hungry?" ask Dr. Jardal but I refuse. "But have you done those mistakes right now?" "Nope, not yet" then Azure slightly laugh "what?" I ask. "Are you gonna do those again?" Dr. Jardal asks "no, no way. I'm not that stupid" then we all laugh. "So clearly this is your chance to change your decisions, make them right. And it's time to face your traumas and issues are you okay with that?" and I nod. I hope this is the start of something good.