Chapter 23.

“I need time to get up and get off the floor

I need time to realize that I can't be yours

I need time to give up just like before

I love it how you knew I'd only come right back for more…” Lost in the Citadel - Lil Nas X

March, 2137

Eveline

Painting soothed me in parts. But not as much as I would like.

It had been two days since I'd been holed up in the greenhouse inside my studio painting non-stop anything that came to mind, my only break was to go out to shower and eat something in the kitchens with Grace before disappearing again.

My father didn't even bother to go into crisis as the reports and other documents that were required came and went without delay while I took my breaks from painting to work on them and Scott came to pick them up at lunchtime and we took the opportunity to talk a little and reminisce about old times.

As we ate he clearly seemed very concerned about my artistic outburst and my disappearance and ended up asking a question or two about Roman and why he looked cranky than usual and I waved the subject off, claiming I didn't know anything when in fact I was the reason.

But this was between me and him, and I would work it out soon.

So today, a quiet Sunday evening, as I finished the painting I will start yesterday, where I painted Roman’s back in this day in the locker room the night I found out I was engaged and that I had feelings for him, I painted every muscle, mark and ink present in his back, I painted his story in that image, told by every tiny mark he carried on his skin and soul.

I knew he had looked for me in my room to talk and so he could apologize, but I wanted to think about everything that was going on and what my steps would be going forward, but I ended up thinking about the only thing that had been dominating my mind for good weeks.

Roman. And only him.

When the last brush stroke was given to the frame I set the brush down on the tripod a knock sounded on the door and I was surprised Scott had come so late, it must probably be something I forget or my dad must have been tormenting the poor men about something "urgent”.

"Just a minute!" I said and got up from the stool I was using and walked to the bathroom at the back of the studio to wash my paint covered hands.

When I looked in the mirror I saw that my hair was almost falling out of the bun I made earlier today and my violet eyes were finally glowing with calm and peace, and I finally felt like I could face Roman and my idiot fiancé.

I opted to loosen my hair and straightened the old shirt I wore for painting and the shorts that had crept up my legs and walked back towards the door barefoot.

“I wonder why you're here so late, what does my dad want now Scott?" I said opening the door smiling and I came across the last person I expected to see there.

Roman.

He was dressed in casual clothes without the usual uniform, and that black silk shirt rolled up to his elbows and black jeans fit him very well, he wore heavy combat boots and a leather jacket covered his body and for the first time I once noticed the piercings I had never seen him wear in his ears and one of them was on his eyebrow.

God bless me.

“Why are you here?” I asked, trying to understand all that view that was in front of me and he just blinked those green eyes at me as he watched me and directed his attention to the room behind me "Roman?" I called him and he blinked and turned his attention to me.

“Can we talk? Please?" He asked and I nodded and made a mental note to talk to Scott about telling everyone about my studio.

"Yeah and we'll talk, but remind me next time to scald Scott with my tea when we see each other again!" I say calmly and see him smile minimally and realize I've missed his smile these two days so I open the door for him to come in and realize then he's holding a medium bag but I can't see the contents.

As he settles in I close the door and only then remember the painting, but it's too late and he's looking at it breathless. I see his face grow hard and his expression become neutral and I hurry over to him.

“I apologize, I don't…” I start to say but he gently touches my lips with his index finger asking me to be quiet and so I do but my eyes are glued to him.

We were silent for a while and he sat on the stool I occupied earlier and pulled me by the hand until I was beside him, his eyes never leaving their own portrait, I admitted I was nervous about what he was thinking but when he rested his head on my shoulder and kissed the sensitive skin there I knew we were fine.

“I didn't know I had that many scars,” It was his first words and I shivered slightly and put my arm around his shoulder and brought him close, and he hugged my waist and snuggled his head better into the crook of my neck “Why did you paint this?” He asked after a while in silence and I pondered how to explain this to him.

"I came here on Friday needing to get out of everything that was going on, everything I was feeling and when I saw it I painted it" I said pointing to the picture that depicted the cliff I had seen and he watched it confused and curious so I continued “And after I finish that when I see I was painting you, painting your story,” I said and felt him stir and lift his head to look at me with confusion in his eyes.

"My story?" He asked, looking at the board in front of us.

"I don't know where all this came from, but I started painting aimlessly trying to take the weight off my back and it seems that the only thing that distracts and calms me is you, not even the landscape I painted brought the comfort I need, but I needed to clear my head before talking to you and then when I saw I was painting you, I painted everything I saw when I looked at you, I painted your strength and your kindness, I painted your pain and your gentleness, I painted the marks that make you who you are, I painted your story that although unknown to me is engraved on your skin with ink and marks, and that's why I called it “The truth in ink and blood” because you carry your truths like that, on your skin, and if you will allow me one day to meet them I will be very grateful, because just as you carry yours in your body and still be so kind with everyone I carry mine with my pictures and flowers and try to be good every day to, you inspires me,” I say all this looking into his eyes and he smiles at me, his eyes shining and then he spreads his legs and puts me between them and grabs my waist put me between them and I wrap my arms around his neck as our breaths mingled.

“You clearly are something else, Sunflower,” He says and lifts one of his hands to my cheek and caresses the skin here and I lean my forehead against his and close my eyes feeling him take a deep breath and nuzzle his nose against mine “Do you forgive me? I never wanted to harm you with your fiance and cause trouble, you know that don't you?” He asks and I open my eyes seeing a note of sadness in his eyes, the same one I'd seen a few days ago mixed with fear and worry and to try to calm him down I held his face in both hands and felt him rub his cheek against my palm and see him close his eyes and I left a kiss in his forehead.

“I've already forgiven you the moment you lowered the gun when I asked, I know dealing with Nate isn't the easiest and most pleasurable thing in the world, but for now I'll have to put up with it, I don't know how it's going to go from now on but we must be careful with him Rom, Nate can be a nice snake whenever he wants to, and after so many threats I'm trying to prevent something bad from happening to any of us because he's sure to wait for the right time to attack us after today,” I say and he nodded, his green eyes blazing with hatred, but I stroked his cheek again and he closed his eyes as he took a deep breath.

When he opened them again I realized that hate was gone and when he looked at me that same note of sadness still came out of his beautiful eyes, and that was starting to worry me.

"What did you really see in the forest?" He asked, breaking the peaceful silence as he looked away briefly and I lowered my hands until they were playing with the baby hairs at the base of his neck.

“A girl,” I said and he frowned and I decided to explain better “While you were tethering the horses and Nate was chattering some bullshit I saw something glow at the edge of the forest and I thought it was just in my head until I heard a click, like a camera and decided to go after whoever was taking my pictures, we ran a lot and ended up falling, and when that happened the girl spoke to me, told me that she was a member of the Outbreak Crown group and that they sympathized with me, and said that the attacks are not their responsibility but the fault is in name of another group, she is about to say their name before the guards arrived and I sent her running, after that you know what happened," I said with a note of amusement but he was serious and his jawline was prominent from the force with which he had locked it, his eyes gave nothing away but he looked worried.

"Rom?" I called him but he shook his head and faced me again, that hard expression completely erased from his face.

“Fuck, that was quite a mess, did you tell anyone else?" He asked and I denied it which made him a little confused.

“I don’t want to draw attention to them, and if you can keep this from everyone I will be grateful,” I said and he nodded and we dropped the subject.

We were silent for a few minutes until he pointed to the bag he had brought and I frowned at him extremely confused.

“So after this extremely good conversation what did you say about us going to the Vortex Equinox party today?" He asked, still tangled up in me and I smiled slightly.

We needed this to distract ourselves a little from everything that happened in the last 48 hours.

“Maybe it's not such a bad idea," I said smiling and he opened a real smile when he saw my joy at being able to go "But wait a minute, people will recognize me!" I said as I felt that joy fade but I saw him point again at the bag and laugh.

“With what I brought, no one will imagine you're there, now walk, go get ready,” He said and let go of me as he took the bag and guided me towards the bathroom and pull me in and after that he closed the door behind him while I chuckled.

Inside when I looked at the contents of the bag I smiled and admire every piece of clothes and make up and saw a piece of paper and after a read them I pressed the small note to my chest as I remembered the words on it:

“We know it hasn't been easy with Nate, and you deserve to have fun before you have to spend the rest of your life tied to that jerk, so enjoy the Equinox Spring party, Vee.

E & A

PS: Give Roman a discount, from what we've learned about Nate he deserved what happened, we love you!”

Completely relaxed, I started to get ready and hoped the party was amazing. I couldn't wait to get there and finally be able to see what that mysterious district was hiding. But I couldn't forget that something about the whole situation was bothering Roman, and I urgently needed to find out what it was before something went wrong.

And I've never been so sure about a feeling.