Chapter 20: Castle in the Sky 2

Standing on the railing, facing the wind, I opened my eyes wide, hoping to find the reflection of the "Sky City" on the flowing river surface. However, all I could see was the dazzling city lights under the neon.

After sobering up, I realized how afraid I was of death, afraid of being submerged in the bottomless moat.

I turned to look at Betsy, but she seemed indifferent.

"Aren't you going to persuade me?" I frowned and asked Betsy.

"Why should I persuade you?" she replied.

"But if I jump, I'll die!"

"It's you who will die, not me," Betsy said calmly.

I jumped down from the railing, angrily saying, "I didn't misjudge you. You're just a venomous woman, willing to let others die to achieve your goals."

"I have no goals. It's you who said you wanted to jump into the river," Betsy still spoke calmly.

I became even angrier, pointing at Betsy and saying, "Can't you stop calmly leading me to my death? ... I remember I called you to persuade me not to jump. According to the script I set, you shouldn't act like this!"

"When I came, you were lying there like a dead person. You wouldn't have jumped anyway. Why bother calling me? Is it fun to fool me?" Betsy finally showed some anger in her words.

Feeling a bit embarrassed, I blurted out, "I wanted to jump into the moat. Just before jumping, I remembered that I owed you over ten thousand dollars, and if I died, you wouldn't get repaid. So, I made up my mind not to jump because I'm a person with a conscience and moral bottom line. I absolutely won't do immoral things like not repaying debts."

"That sounds quite dramatic!" Betsy looked at me with a half-smile.

"It's dramatic! Don't you know how much I struggled at that moment? On one side was the relief after death, on the other was the guilt of not repaying debts. It was hard to choose! ... Of course, in the end, I struggled to uphold my moral bottom line, so I'm still alive." I exaggerated my expression.

Betsy seemed unwilling to listen to my nonsense. She stood up from the ground and prepared to leave.

"Wait." I stopped Betsy.

"What now?" Betsy's tone was already very impatient as she put on the coat she had just covered me with.

"Have you been sitting here watching over me since the afternoon?"

"I came to collect your corpse, not to persuade you, so I came in the evening," Betsy said calmly.

"Who are you trying to fool? You came to collect my corpse and even covered me with a coat?" I exposed Betsy's lie with a meaningful smile.

Betsy turned around and looked at me coldly, saying, "A covering is always placed on a corpse to hide the appearance. Don't you know that?"

I was left speechless by Betsy's words. I remained sitting there, and my attention shifted from the argument with Betsy. The alcohol, not fully processed in my system, began to stir again, causing dizziness and a strong urge to vomit.

Leaning on the railing, I emptied myself and vomited into the moat. I had indeed drunk too much at lunch.

After vomiting, I collapsed against the railing, closed my eyes, and as my consciousness became clearer, the scenes from Morton Cowper and Bella's wedding earlier in the day replayed in my mind. Along with it came a tearing pain in my body.

At that moment, Bradford helped Jenny put on the diamond crystal necklace, symbolizing their engagement. How I wished to tell Jenny without reservation: I want to go back to the silent and joyful past, a past filled with love...

But the past was never retrievable. I lost Jenny and could only watch her be happy in someone else's world!

Amid the tearing pain, a warmth filled my eyes, and it seemed like I was crying.

Certainly, it wasn't me crying; it was the Sky City shedding tears, breaking down the sorrow within me with its tears.

"You're crying, wipe away your tears."

I opened my eyes, and it turned out Betsy hadn't left yet. She handed me a tissue.

I didn't take the tissue; I let the wind dry my tears. No trace would be left that way.

Betsy squatted down, looking at me. Finally, her tone softened as she asked, "Did I say something too harsh earlier? I shouldn't have mocked you as a corpse."

I remained silent for a while before saying in a low voice, "Actually, it has nothing to do with you. Even if I were a corpse, it would just be a moment of pain before death. The real pain is the agony of being alive... Do you understand that feeling?"

Betsy shook her head, saying, "I don't understand. All I think about now is when you'll move out of my house."

"Are you so fed up with me?" I smiled and asked, my tears seemingly dried up by the wind.

"Yes, your behavior doesn't leave a good impression on me. You're a complete scoundrel!" Betsy bluntly stated.

"Is that so?... But you don't know that the scoundrel you see once had a clean city in his heart!"

"I don't quite understand what you're saying."

"You don't need to understand... because today, that city has detached from my body and become a Sky City that I can never touch again!"

I lowered my head and fumbled in my pocket, but there was no cigarette left to burn away the melancholy, to mend my shattered soul.

Betsy didn't speak. She sat down beside me, leaning on the railing in the same manner. The surroundings became quieter as if isolated from the hustle and bustle of the city by the night. A breeze blew through, carrying an equality of all beings, extinguishing the worldly fireworks.

I saw a half-smoked cigarette on the ground, picked it up, blew on it, and lit it again. The scent of tobacco once again filled the air, dissipating in the dim light...

Finally, I said to Betsy, "I know you want me to leave. I will move out, tomorrow."

"Is it true this time?"

"It's true... I've lost even a city, so why would I care about a room?..."

Betsy seemed somewhat curious about why I kept mentioning that city. She asked, "What does this Sky City you're talking about look like?"

After thinking for a moment, I said, "It's a translucent yet silent city. It has a magical power that makes people forget their troubles, forget their pain, forget the dazzle of the world. When you live there, nothing else matters, because you will transform into a translucent bird, breaking through all constraints and soaring in the winds of freedom..."

"But birds eventually have to land. After landing, will they still be translucent?" Betsy looked at me and asked.

"I don't know... because I haven't thought about what it looks like after landing."

...

Perhaps my pitiful appearance elicited some sympathy from Betsy. That night, she didn't leave me alone by the river. I sat in her car as we drove towards the bustling, somewhat illusionary city. I had made up my mind; after that night, I would move out of that old house. My life couldn't get any worse, so I might as well fulfill Betsy's wish and give her some peace.

During the journey, we were both silent. I interpreted Betsy's silence as her continuing dissatisfaction with my repeated deception today. My current plight and misery couldn't completely extinguish the flames of her anger. Bringing me back from the outskirts already showed a bit of humanity.

Back in our residential area, Betsy parked the car. We walked towards the entrance of the building one after another. Unexpectedly, we found Mr. Ban sitting on the steps at the entrance, and beside him was the decades-old black briefcase.