Part Five

Ethan and I went to the market the next day because our families made us their errand boys. The last thing we had to do was buy bread, so we went to a bakery.

We purchased our fresh bread and were about to go. Walking outside a man came inside, and we walked into each other. He fell. I apologized and wanted to help him up, but when I looked at him, I saw a monster.

I was about to draw my sword when Ethan realized and stopped me. When I realized what was happening, I got a headache again because of all the memories flooding in.

It was like a nightmare. I didn't have clear pictures, and everything was blurry. But one thing was clear to me. Something was wrong, and that was not my condition.

Ethan asked me what was happening and offered me the medication I'd got from Jack. From Jack… the man I loved and still do.

Although I was in a painful state, I refused to take them. I also told Ethan not to say anything to anyone, not even Jack.

The pain I felt was horrible, but that I spent even a second to think maybe Jack did something broke me. How could I have thought about something like that?

He probably also doesn't know. He didn't make the pills himself and got them from someone. Those people are perhaps behind this if there was someone plotting something.

However, I still couldn't tell him. It would be too risky if he actually… No! I decided to stop thinking about that possibility. I choose to be blind.

At least as long as nothing was confirmed. So, I had a new mission. Find out what's going on. Like this, I would be free from these horrible visions but also prove to myself that I was wrong thinking like that about Jack.

I would prove his innocence and then continue living by his side. Because if he wasn't by my side, I couldn't live. I didn't need a life if I didn't have him by my side.

I couldn't allow the slightest doubt to corrupt my head. I don't want to lose him. Everyone but please… not him.

Ethan asked me why I refused the pills and why he shouldn't tell Jack. He wanted to know what was going on. I knew he'd know immediately if I lied, but I couldn't tell him. Not now. Not yet.

And I said it like that to him. I asked him not to question it and trust me, even if I looked suspicious.

I had to do something. But I didn't know where to start. So, when everyone was sleeping at night, I went to the place where the monsters appeared that didn't attack me.

It was the first place where something weird happened that wasn't a vision.

Somehow, I could feel that this was also related to everything else. But I couldn't find anything. There was nothing left. No sign that could help me find a lead. I searched near the area and just hoped.

I didn't know what I was searching for, which made everything worse.

After a long time, I found monsters roaming around a cave that shouldn't be there. I grew up in this area and came for the monster clearance mission. It was the first time seeing that cave. I had found a lead.

Since I didn't know if those monsters would attack me or not, I decided to first show myself to one of them. I waited until one of them was alone and walked in front of it with my sword in its scabbard.

It first was startled and looked like it was going to attack me but then stopped. It didn't attack me like the other monsters before. I walked towards the cave, slowly exposing myself to the other monsters.

None of them attacked me. I tried talking to them, but it didn't work again. Somehow all monsters went inside, and I followed them. Suddenly the monsters disappeared.

I looked around and hoped to find something inside the cave. There was not much to see, but I found something strange.

Inside the cave, I found a cinder on the ground. There were traces of a campfire. Why would monsters need that? Everything I found in the cave, even just the feeling, indicated that humans were camping there.

The longer I stayed there, the more traces I found of humans. But the strange part is that those traces weren't there initially. One moment there is just a stone and nothing more, and the other moment I find a mug on it.

Why would monsters need a mug? Were people here before the monsters came? But at the same time, it looked like if people were here, they didn't leave too long ago.

They must have run into the monsters. Were those also not attacked? But why were they here? Will they come back?

The longer I stayed, the more I felt the presence of people. After a while, I started hearing things. People talking and calling me. I heard people calling my name, and when I looked in the direction, the monsters appeared.

They walked towards me, and I pulled out my sword in order to protect me. Even if they didn't attack me earlier, they could do it anytime. They paused and stayed where they were without moving forward.

The voices continued to talk to me. It sounded like they were talking in whole sentences, but all I heard was my name and weird sounds.

Between those voices, I started to hear a familiar one. Ethan was calling for me.

When I realized that, I found myself where the cave entrance should be, with no cave or monsters in sight. Just me in front of a wall.

Ethan came and asked me what I was doing here and if I was in my right mind wandering alone in the middle of the night. I explained to him that I just wanted to cool down after what happened today and that I couldn't sleep.

I also reminded him that I'm one of the best fighters in the kingdom, so he doesn't have to worry. After that, I asked him how he knew that I was there. He said he walked around till he found me.

At that moment, we both lied. As I did, he knew it too.

Returning from the vacation, we heard rumors going around in the city that the prince would marry the princess of the neighboring kingdom.

Usually, I would get jealous, but I couldn't care less at that moment. I knew it was just rumors and this would never happen, so I wasn't concerned about that.

I had other problems I had to focus on. In contrast to the rumors, I didn't know the truth. However, That didn't stop me from seeing him.

After all that happened, I wanted to be by his side and just stop thinking.

We met in our garden, but it felt wrong. How could I step into the place which was a secure space for us and bring my doubting thoughts with me?

I was just tired of thinking about it.

When he came, the first thing I did was hug him and not say anything. I also ignored his questions and wasn't focusing.

He then pushed me back a little and held my face with his hands looking directly into my eyes. "Focus on me," he said.

I saw his beautiful eyes look at me with such a caring gaze determined to make me feel secure. I was ashamed of myself.

How could I have thought he could have done something? He was innocent, and I was sure of it. I took him into my arms and apologized while tearing up.

He asked me if something was wrong. I told him that, indeed, something was wrong. But since I saw him just now, my problems solved themselves.

With his hands going through my hair, he asked me if this was because of the rumors. I didn't say anything. He continued to explain to me that those were just rumors and that I could relax.

Of course, he thought it was because of the talks. Unlike me, he would never suspect me of anything terrible. Because he trusted me, and I apparently didn't.

I just wanted to dig a hole and go inside it because although I was ashamed, I still couldn't tell him.

He talked to me while I was thinking about all that, saying I'm not focusing on him. I chuckled and apologized, telling him that I was exhausted from the road coming back. I placed my head on his shoulder.

"I love you. So please never leave me. I can't do this without you."

"You don't have to worry. Everything I do is for us to stay together. I will never leave you. No one can take you away from me."