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510. Chapter 510

She worries about the big things.

“I’ve never done this before, Kara. The… sex… stuff. What if I’m… bad at it? What if Maggie leaves because she doesn’t want someone fresh off the boat after all?”

“Well then, your sister is Supergirl and I can take care of her. But seriously, Alex: she really seems to like you, and that’s because of you, not… not sex. And anyway, I’m sure you’ll catch on really quick with all… all that.”

She worries about the really big things.

“I just panicked, Kara, you were gone and it was my fault and if I hadn’t been so distracted, I wouldn’t have let you go alone. You could have died, Kara, you could have been trapped there, how could I ever have forgiven my– “

“Alex, Alex, hey. None of that was your fault. It’s not your job to come everywhere with me, I’m not a little girl anymore.”

“But – “

“I know, I know. We protect each other. And we do. You did. You came and got me. But Alex, you deserve this. To be happy. Go apologize to her. You deserve happiness, and the way you were smiling this morning? Go apologize to her.”

But mostly, Alex worries about the small things.

Like when Maggie wants to order Thai food and Alex is in the mood for pizza, she worries that Maggie will be angry if she says she wants pizza, or – worse – if she asks if they can get pizza.

And Maggie doesn’t tell her that it’s only takeout. She doesn’t tell her that she needs to pull herself together because their dinner order really isn’t a big deal.

Instead, she pulls Alex close, and she kisses every inch of her face. She runs tender fingers through her hair and she hums softly until Alex’s panic calms.

“Hey, shhhh, I’m here, babe. I’m here. I’m not angry at you. You’re not bad for being in the mood for bread and sauce.”

Alex chuckles wetly and Maggie smiles, kissing the tip of her nose and holding her face in her hands.

“I love when you tell me what you want, Alex. You don’t have to be scared I’ll be mad at you when you do. Okay?”

Alex’s eyebrow arches and she bites her lip.

“You love when I tell you what I want, huh?” she rasps, and Maggie gulps, suddenly very weak in the knees.

Alex panics when she’s late for a date, when she’s late coming home – home, god, home – when Kara needs her, when it’s Sisters’ Night and Maggie can’t come, when she forgets to pick up dishwasher detergent.

She panics and she apologizes and she barely holds in tears, because she can get used to this – this happiness thing, this Maggie wearing her t-shirts and little else, this waking up next to the most beautiful woman she’s ever seen, this screaming writhing blissful orgasm… thing – but what if she disappoints Maggie?

What if she makes her angry? What if Maggie finally sees that Alex isn’t worth all of it, after all?

But Maggie?

“Go see your sister, sweetie,” she’ll smile, bringing Alex’s knuckles up to her lips to kiss a saga of love and devotion onto each one. “I love how close you two are. You never have to apologize for that. Not to me, not ever. Alright, babe?”

“You’re perfect, babygirl,” she’ll whisper, drawing Alex in close when she shows up late for the second night in a row, because Cadmus, because the lab, because… “I love how dedicated you are to your job. To keeping this city safe. You’re a protector, Alex, and it’s what drew me to you. You don’t have to apologize for being you, alright? Not ever.”

“You wanna cuddle, Ally?” she’ll ask, when Alex starts crying because hard as Maggie is trying – and god, does her trying feel good – Alex can’t quite get over the edge tonight, can’t quite convulse into an orgasm, and god, dammit, she can’t disappoint Maggie like this, she can’t… “Or, you know, you can touch yourself. If you uh…” She kisses her collarbone and Alex shudders with pleasure. “If you wanna finish what we started.”

“But I feel bad, I should be able to – “

“Shhh, no babe, that’s not how this works. Sometimes you just need your own hand, and that’s okay. Damn, Danvers, that’s sexy. You’re sexy. You’re perfect. I promise you, Al, you’re perfect. Okay?”

So again, Alex arches an eyebrow and bites her lip, and she discovers just how sexy it is to let Maggie watch her touch herself.

And when they both collapse against the sheets, sated and spent and in awe of each other’s vulnerability, in awe of each other’s beauty, Maggie draws Alex close to her.

She draws her close and she traces words of love onto her stomach and she presses kisses to her hair and she whispers to her soft and she whispers to her tender and she whispers to her so, so sincere.

“I love you, Alex Danvers. You’re brilliant, and you’re dedicated, and you’re gorgeous, and you’re everything. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted and so much more. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

And god, god, god, does Alex love her, too.