290. Chapter 290

Maggie absolutely loves topping her.

She loves how pliant her body is underneath hers, loves the sounds she makes, loves the way her eyes flutter closed, the way she scratches at her back, the way her own back arches helplessly. The way she screams her throat raw on Maggie’s name.

She loves the way that badass, take-no-prisoners, ruthless, perfectionist, take-care-of-everybody-and-what-do-you-mean-I-have-needs-too DEO agent Alex Danvers surrenders to being worshiped by her. Submits to her love. Writhes and begs and whines and lets everything go for the prayers she plays out on Alex’s body.

The way Alex trusts her.

Fully, completely.

The way Alex gives her everything by taking everything: the way Alex gives her everything by letting her love her, by letting her adore her, by letting her be trusted.

But the first time Alex’s eyes flash and she asks with her eyes, with her gentle touch, with her body, if she can put Maggie’s wrists above her head and return every bit of worshiping she’s gotten in their first times, Maggie doesn’t hesitate.

Because Alex’s desire to please her, to touch her, to do everything with her, to her, is palpable. Is radiating.

And god, does Maggie want her.

Want to be taken by her.

And god, does Alex take her.

She makes sure Maggie’s head is resting perfectly on her favorite pillow and she kisses every centimeter of her face and she takes her time stripping her naked, and every time Maggie tells her that she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to, that they can stop whenever Alex wants, that she doesn’t owe Maggie anything, Alex pffts and Alex rasps, “do you want me to stop?”, and Maggie splutters – no woman has ever made her splutter before, and she wonders if she picked it up from Alex or if Alex was just always fated to have that effect on her – and she shakes her head and Alex grins and Alex continues.

Alex is a quick study – of course Alex is a quick study – and she takes her time bringing Maggie to orgasm after orgasm after orgasm, her mouth exploring her breasts, figuring out exactly what rhythm of her tongue over her hardened nipples makes her whine loudest, pant hardest.

Takes her time figuring out which spots on her stomach make Maggie giggle and which spots – when Alex’s teeth gently, and then at Maggie’s desperate urging, not so gently, graze her skin – make Maggie unravel.

Takes her time figuring out that Maggie has no problem keeping one leg up on Alex’s shoulder so Alex can fuck her deeper, can fuck her harder, can reach deeper inside her, touch places in her body, her soul, that no one has ever bothered to explore.

Takes her time figuring out that if she puts her thigh between Maggie’s legs and arches to take one of Maggie’s nipples into her mouth at the same time, it won’t take her long to cum. Hard. Again.

And because Alex is a quick study, Alex imitates Maggie’s constant checking in, her constant questioning – “are you sure, babe?” “do you want this, Maggie?” “all good?” “like that?” “do you need a break?” “do you like when I lick your clit like that, or like that? Both? Mmm, excellent” – and Maggie is so swept away, so caught up, in being the center of this gorgeous woman’s attention, the sole focus of this brilliant soldier-scientist’s incredible brain and body power, that her answer, truly, madly, deeply, is always yes Alex, please, god, don’t stop, Alex, Alex, Alex.

But when Alex wipes her mouth on her bare shoulder and kisses the insides of Maggie’s thighs, a satisfied, deeply affectionate but also deeply smug grin on her face after making Maggie cum for the upteenth time, Maggie panics.

Panics because it’s almost sunrise, and she’s done nothing for Alex all night.

She can’t count the number of times she’s cum, and the only thing she’s done has been begging Alex for more.

The only thing she’s done has been selfish preening and worthless whining and god, how can she be this self-involved, this lazy, this unwilling to work for such a gorgeous, perfect, dedicated woman?

How can she have let Alex dedicate herself solely to her pleasure and offer her absolutely nothing in return?

So she panics.

She panics, and shame sweeps through her stomach because maybe this, this, this is why she’s never truly bottomed for anyone before, because she isn’t lazy, she isn’t selfish, she isn’t worthless, she isn’t greedy, she isn’t… except she is. Because the last few hours – god, the last few incredible hours – prove that she is exactly those things.

“Hey, hey, hey, I’ve got you. I’ve got you. Did I hurt you, are you okay?”

And suddenly Alex is out from between her legs and crawling up to where she could cradle her body, hovering because she’s unsure of whether to touch her, but concern is radiating from her eyes – genuine, full-throated concern – and that concern just makes the shame sweep harder through Maggie’s stomach.

“You didn’t hurt me, I’m fine. It’s nothing, it’s whatever, it – “

“No, Maggie. It’s not whatever. Your whole body tensed up, you… it matters, Maggie. You matter.”

Alex’s face is a map of confusion, a map of worry, a map of god please tell me I didn’t hurt you.

Maggie makes a futile grab for the covers – being naked right now is just a reminder of how selfish she is – and Alex immediately lunges down the bed to get them and tuck Maggie in.

“No, no, you don’t have to… see, that’s just it, Danvers, I…”

“I’m sorry – “ Alex drops the sheets and holds up her hands immediately in soft surrender.

Surrender. Surrender.

“No, Alex, I’m sorry, you didn’t do anything wrong, I just…”

She looks away and she clenches her jaw and she can feel Alex staring down at her, can feel Alex thinking, can feel Alex calculating.

“We’ve never had sex quite like that before,” Alex observes softly, so softly, after a few long, silent moments.

Maggie still won’t look at her, and she desperately tries to control the burning in her eyes, the churning in her stomach, but she tries to remember the trust that led her to let Alex top her to begin with, so she nods.

“I’ve never really… taken the lead.”

Maggie nods again.

“Was it bad? Was I bad? Because I can get better, I – “

“No! No, Alex, you were… you were amazing, it…”

“You can tell me if I – “

“No. You were perfect, Alex, I promise, it’s not that – “

“Then what is it, Maggie? You can tell me.”

A long silence. Alex rests her body down on one elbow and holds out a hovering hand, a question in her eyes. Maggie nods again and Alex strokes her hair softly.

And that’s exactly what Maggie needs, which is exactly why Maggie breaks.

“Why would you… what did you get out of all that, Alex? I just… I just laid there, I didn’t do anything for you, I… how selfish could I be, it… I didn’t do anything for you, Alex, all night, I just – “

“Maggie, wait. That’s not… are you kidding? Do you seriously want to feel how wet I am right now?”

Maggie pffts at Alex’s earnesty with wet eyes. “Nerd.”

Alex smiles with relief and kisses her forehead.

“Maggie, I… I’m so glad you let me… top you? Is that the way to say it? I…” Alex pauses and searches Maggie’s face for the right words. “Maggie, you’re always in control of everything. You’re always responsible, you’re always making decisions. Life and death decisions! And you… you always take care of me, you always just… you make me so happy, Maggie, and I… you deserve it. You deserve to be taken care of. You deserve to lay back and let me worship you, because you… you’re amazing, Maggie, and you deserve to let go, you deserve to be cared for. And – and… it’s giving me a gift, Maggie. You trusting me like that. You letting me lo… letting me care for you like that, that’s a gift, Maggie. It’s perfect. You’re perfect, and you deserve to be shown that. And, if you’re worried that you weren’t doing anything for me… you’ve gotta be kidding. That was the… sexiest, hottest… thing I’ve ever done… the… you… I came, you know. A bunch of times, not that that was the point, but I’m just saying, feeling you like that, touching you like that? Listening to you like that? I came. Because it was so incredible, I just… I didn’t make a big deal out of it, because I wanted to focus on you. You deserve to be focused on, Maggie. I promise I love…d it. I promise.”

Another long pause, another thick silence.

“So you’re saying you liked it. Cause that’s… that’s what I’m getting.”

“Oh my god, you’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

“Not a chance, Danvers. Not a chance.”