Forty Nine.

Eren

These past few weeks have been some of the hardest and longest of my life, and they held one of the hardest days of my life. So much has happened, so much has changed, and yet none of it has made any difference in the way my life has played out.

From the moment that Lecia had said that word I hadn't been able to get it out of my mind. Nothing had mattered more than getting away from there as soon as I could and no matter how far I went from the clinic, my mind wondered back to her.

Getting out of that room had been the most important thing to me and for whatever reason I had suddenly decided that leaving out the window was a smarter idea than going out the door.

Since I had been in the shorts given by the nurse, I didn't bother to take them off before shifting and running to the pack house. Dane was so pissed that I left. He had wanted to stay and watch Dylan to see if she woke up.

"What is wrong with you, why would you leave," Dane hissed at me. As he ran through the woods, I couldn't say anything to him and just repeated the word over and over in my mind.

Mate.

Mate.

Mate!

How in the world would Lecia have jumped to that conclusion when it hadn't even crossed my mind. I mean it's true that I had feelings for her, but to think that she could be my mate. It had never even crossed my mind.

Honestly, I had never imagined having a mate. All I wanted was to get away from my uncle as soon as I could. Eventually, my plans began to include getting Dylan out of there to, but it was to keep her safe from my uncle and from me.

As Dane ran I could hear his thoughts as well, and he was doing the exact same thing I was, but with Dylan's wolf Rae. He played around with her name and kept thinking of all it's meanings.

It was cute, in a sickening sort of vomit inducing way hearing him be so sweet. That was definitely not the Dane I knew. I laughed at his internal growl and knew that if he could flip me off right now, he would.

The pack house was still busy when I arrived and I had managed to get up to my room without anyone noticing me. Showering didn't help my mood any either. 

I wanted to check in with Lecia or Cruz and see if there had been any change with Dylan, but I really didn't wish to talk to either of them. Lecia was annoyingly perceptive, but Cruz had been acting strange with me lately.

Choosing to go to bed had not been a good idea either. It seemed that all of my thoughts now waking and dreaming were full of her. Surprisingly, I had fallen asleep, but the image of her collapsing pulled me out of my dream.

It was almost morning and when I checked my phone there was no calls or texts from anyone and I didn't know if I should be glad about that or not. My thoughts had immediately gone to Dylan and I knew I had to check on her.

Deciding that calling the clinic would be my best option, I quickly dialed and had already assumed that one of the nurses would answer. To my surprise, Dr. Pavel's voice was the one on the other end of the line.

Impressed and a bit taken aback, I didn't know what to say, so like the genius I am, I didn't say anything. "Is anyone there," finally came out over the line and I finally remembered how to speak, sort of.

"Umm, I uh, wanted to see if I could find out how someone is doing?" Gods, could I sound like a bigger idiot? Dane snickered at me, and I wished I could hit him just once. Sh*t, should I have even bothered to call to get an update.

Waiting to see if I should just hang up or not, Dr. Pavel seemed to know exactly who I was and who I had been calling about. "If you want to know how Ms. Solamier is doing Eren Bluera, you must learn how to speak."

Before I could even respond he snorted, "before you ask, I knew it was you because all her other companions from yesterday are already here." Well damn, that both answered my unasked question and made me feel like sh*t.

Had they all stayed with her? 

Was I the only one who had left her like that?

I wanted to ask, but I knew that those questions weren't important. "Has she improved or have you figured out what's wrong with her?" Those were important and the ones I needed answered. 

The silence on the line stretched out longer than I thought he would let it and for a second I wasn't sure if he was going to answer me. Letting out a deep sigh he finally said, "since you're not family I shouldn't be telling you anything, but there is no change and no updates."

The line disconnected the moment he finished speaking and I was left hallow. Nothing made sense and it hasn't for quite some time if I'm being honest. There's been so much going on that I felt lost with no way to navigate my way out.

With nothing to do, I fell back into a restless sleep. This time I was plagued by nightmares of Dylan being the one my uncle and his beast had in that room for those few days instead of me.

Dane and I both knew that it was fear that fueled those thoughts and dreams. Both fear from that experience and fear of what he may end up doing to Dylan. Even though my mind couldn't rest, my body needed to, so I stayed in bed the rest of the day.

Surprised that I had no one come look for me, I went down to eat in the dining hall. After three full plates of food, I grabbed two desserts before heading back to my room. Once I was there I started feeling anxious. I needed to find out if there was any changes with her.

The moment I had my phone in my hand I called Cruz, but I wasn't surprised that he hadn't answered me. Up next was Lecia, and thankfully she picked up before the end of the first ring. "It's about damn time you call to check on her," she fumed.

Stuttering out my response because I hadn't expected that as her greeting, "I did check on her, it's just that, I had to sleep and eat, and you are the only one who answered my call."

"Well, I don't know what's stopping you from visiting her. Or are you afraid to be seen here with her?" Damn her and her questions. I swear if Harper doesn't recruit this chick he's really going to miss out.

How did I tell her that I wasn't sure about the whole mate thing, or what danger my presence may bring her, or that I am afraid what will happen if she wakes up and sees me there, or what happens if she doesn't wake at all?

Taking too long to answer her she scoffed, "If being seen visiting her is the problem, then don't get caught!" When the line disconnected I sat there for longer than I would like to admit with the phone still held to my ear.

By the time full night had fallen, Dane and I had come up with a plan. Dane had been the one who remembered that we had left through the window and he said someone as smart as Lecia had probably remembered to and left it unlocked.

Waiting until a little past midnight, I snuck out of the pack house and shifted so I could get to the clinic as soon as I could. Making sure that no one was there in the room first, I finally shifted and changed into the clothes I had bought with me. 

The moment I opened the window, her scent hit me and though it was mixed with a metallic scent, it made my heart beat a bit faster. Sneaking into the room was easier than I would have liked, but I was glad to see that she was alone. 

Once in the room, I walked over to her and those same little currents ran up and down my arms, chest and back. There was no change in her appearance, but I felt Dane searching for her Rae.

"I still can not sense her, why would that be," he asked with such sadness that I didn't even try to answer him so that I didn't hurt him any further. I quietly pulled the stool over to her bed and sat beside her, but kept myself from touching her.

Just inhaling her scent and being this close to her both soothed me and filled me with fear. I had never had feelings for another female and I still wasn't sure what this was between us, but I had to admit that there was something there.

That was the first night I visited Dylan, but not the last. In fact, I went every night. I stayed by her beside for a few hours. Learning the routine of the nurses helped to time my visits perfectly and I had it down to a science.

My days were filled with school, patrolling, and training, but my nights were just for her. Even though there was no change, just being with her seemed like enough. Though the days went by so slowly, my nights seemed to pass too quickly.

I hadn't realized what day it was until my aunt came in my room with a tiny cupcake with one blue sparkly candle. "Happy birthday sweetheart," she cooed as she came over to me, and in that moment I realized that today was the day I would find out.

Unable to focus on anything that entire day, my mind just kept going to Dylan and even Dane was anxious about our visit tonight. Frustration had started to set in and I was so out of it that I hadn't realized that Lecia was waiting for me by the lockers.

"So, today's the day right, oh and happy birthday by the way," she said as she bumped me with her elbow when she fell into stride beside me.

"Thanks," I grumbled to her as she continued to walk beside me. I was on my way to training and I wasn't in the mood to be around anyone right now. She stayed in pace with me for a while until I couldn't take it anymore.

"Is there a reason you're stalking me all of a sudden." The look she gave me held a mixture of amusement, and annoyance but she didn't stop.

I was about to stop walking and make her leave, until she said, "I am just curious to see if my guess was correct and I wasn't sure when you would be going to confirm both our suspicions."

Gods, she was infuriating. I wanted to yell at her and scream that she was wrong and that this was none of her business. But I would be lying to myself if I said those things to her. Unable to meet her gaze I let out," I guess I'll find out tonight won't I," I said as I walked past her into the training hall.

To say that it was the longest day of my life was an understatement. I ate my dinner as slow as I could, I showered, and paced my room for what seemed like hours until my alarm went off to let me know that it was time to head to the clinic.

I was not surprised to see Lecia standing outside the clinic right near the edge of the woods, but I was shocked to see her brothers. Cruz hadn't spoken to me since everything happened with Dylan and I was in no mood to see any of them right now.

"What are you all doing here," I asked the moment I had shifted and put clothes on. I was anxious to know if she was my mate, but I was also afraid of what that would mean for her and I didn't feel like having an audience for this moment.

"Look, Dylan is my best friend and I think that having us here to help explain things to her once she wakes up will help her work through this, don't you think," she said so casually that I was almost offended.

Too flustered to deal with her at the moment, I just shrugged as I walked past them and headed straight to the window that I was so used to crawling through. The moment I opened it, her scent didn't just fill my lungs, but it filled my entire body, heart, and soul.

Practically ripping the window open, I flew through it and immediately felt the tingling sensation run across my entire body. Desire flooded me and Dane was practically screaming Mate over and over in my head.

Walking straight over towards her, I didn't stop myself from reaching out and touching her hand. The heat and current that shot through me the moment our skin touched was so overwhelming I had completely forgotten that I was not alone with her.

As soon as Lecia entered the window, I glared at her and even though I knew who she was and what her relationship was with Dylan, I didn't want her any closer to her.

It was even worse when her brothers entered the room. I was leaning over her body and trying to block her from their sight. Dane was growling and I almost did the same, but only stopped myself because I didn't need the nurses to hear me.

"Stay back," Lecia said to her brothers once they were in the room and had closed the door. "It seems our little Eren, has indeed found his mate." The smile on her face was soft and gentle and I sensed that she was honestly happy for me, but I still didn't want them any closer to her.

Gods, Dylan was my mate and even though I had no idea what that would mean for her once she woke up, I had already resolved that I would do whatever I had to do to keep her safe.

Nico spoke from where he stood behind Lecia, "congrats man, I hope it works out for you two." The goofy smile on his face helped me not rush over to him and throw him out of the room, but I didn't respond to him either.

Cruz just stood there watching me, but I could have sworn the look on his face was hostile. It wasn't until he finally spoke that I knew I had been right.

"Do you think you honestly deserve her, or that she will even forgive you after everything that you have done to her?"

Dane was furious and it took all the self control that I had to keep myself from rushing over to him and throwing him out that window. "I will do whatever I have to do to be worthy of her and to show her everyday how sorry I was for everything he made me do to her," I growled at him.

The moment the words left my mouth, I knew that I had made a mistake because all three of their expressions changed.

"So I was right, he did make you do those things?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Who would want you to do something like that?"

"You've done it now," Dane growled at me. It didn't matter if he was right. Nothing mattered besides trying to figure out what was going on with Dylan and trying to help her to wake up. If these three could help me do that then everything would be worth it.

Agreeing to tell them everything I knew once I had made them swear to keep it a secret, I let them move a bit closer to Dylan as I told them all I could.

By the time we had left her room that night, Lecia had come up with a plan and roles for all four of us. The three of them had left before me, and Dane was practically threatening to shift right there in the room if I didn't stay with her a bit longer.

Grabbing her hand I linked our fingers together and pressed the back of her hand to my lips. The sensations were overwhelming and I had to close my eyes to keep myself focused while I soaked it all in.

For a second, one of her machines started to make a different nose, immediately turning to check her over, I saw that her oxygen mask was getting fogged up and that her eyes seemed to flutter softly.

I immediately let her go and watched as the machine began to quite down. Had this reaction been because we were touching?

The light from the windows was starting to brighten and I knew that I didn't have time to test this out any longer, so I kissed her forehead before forcing myself to leave her for the night.

Once I was on my way back to the pack house, I began to plan and plot with Dane to not only figure out how to help Dylan wake up, but to get her away from my uncle.

I knew that going to Vit would be risky, but I had a gut feeling that he might be able to help her. Either way I would see what he knew about my uncle, Dylan, and anything else that I may be able to use to help her at all.

My main priority was her and I knew that I had to keep the fact that she was my mate from everyone especially my uncle. I needed to know what he had against Dylan and see if I can stop him.

She was mine and even if she didn't make me hers, I would never let anyone hurt her again. Dane was in complete agreement with me and he was anxious to start our plan now.

Instead of heading to the pack house, we went to the barracks. I knew that going to Vit's place was out of the question, but if I could talk to him during training, that would be the safest for both him and I.

To my surprise, Vit was just entering the training hall and when I approached him, he immediately turned to me, "I can smell her on you, make sure he doesn't if you truly want to keep her safe."