Our Story

Looking at the fresh rain pouring from the skies, breathing the oduor of dry earth turning to mud and listening to the stiff grass drinking itself full and plush. I was glaring outside the window looking at the splashing water and dirtying the newly painted walls. I felt bad for the painter, he must be really be crushed right now since most of it is washing away. Who cares anyway.

Smooth, naturally white stepping stones led in from the gateway up to six broad, solid, stone-slab steps that led up to the L-shaped veranda that ran along the front and the entire length of one side of the house.

Our dream house stood beautifully and strongly against the rains. I wanted a simple life, whee we could walk in the street and enter a shop and get her a pair of Converse shoes, because she loved that I wear them. Of course I do, they are the only sensible shoes my mum ever got for me when I was growing up.

A vegetable garden that grew pumpkins banana trees sugarcane patches, avocado trees. A footpath led through these trees down to the chicken coup and further down to the bottom land to the banks of the Sweet Rivers. This was the dream I have lying in my head. Even as I think of settling with Muffin then mad Val comes back, it all seems a dream, not real or will even be. Maybe sometimes, I'm nostalgic.

Look now at what is our life, scattered and broken. Not wholly gone to the void. Maybe we'll have a chance to renew our love story and start on a fresh page. I had tried as much as I could to keep her away from friends from my past. I just wish I could erase some people from my life. Some of them made go through hell back in my Campus days. But I managed to get a damn scholarship in my second year and flew abroad to business school. Took my study seriously and made it a hobby, it was paying off finally, working on individuals and companies' books of accounts. Might seem complicated but if you know your numbers well, you're good to go.

Val came first and blew my mind, I was deep engulfed in her world and sank deep in her love and wanted no other soul. She was everything I would ever want in a woman. My love and my close friend, my bread when I'm hungry, my shelter when it was cold, she was a part of me as well as I was a part of hers. A cousin of hers had talked briefly to me about a lucrative investment in the stock market. We made plans but he never showed, only for him to show up in her arms, what were they thinking? Family get together don't you think? Cuddling so intimately that I was left wondering, they held each other whispering a lot of sweet nothings. It hurt me though I didn't understand why I never bothered to chase after then and demand an explanation. Instead my temper made the decision on my behalf and I stormed out of her life only for her to resurface in my apartment and got kicked out.

If it were those days when I didn't mind sleeping with her, she'd have her orgasms riding in a high, too bad I had moved away from that creepy life. All I want right now is Muffin, she's all I want. I have no sweet or charming words to say to her, I'm now dry if jokes unless I see her. My heart bleeds for her, my hands reach out to her and hold her so tight.

We have been through worse especially when I hide things from her, it's just a habit I want to drop but it seems it has been deeply cemented in my system. I don't know if it's a reflex to hide stuff she might go wild and won't rest till she gets to the bottom of the things. She finds out anyway like I knew she would and she goes hysterical demanding to know why I never mentioned anything to her. She's a Little to concerned in things not that important.

She haunts me in my dreams, I once told her we couldn't work and that we should break up and she went ahead to get her royal purple dress cleaned and ironed and said it was the one she wanted to wear to her grave. She arranged even a pair of stockings, a hat and a pair of white gloves. Her navy blue stilettos polished and buffed.

I discovered she'd written my name on pieces of paper and placed them under her cherished saucers, ceramics and vases. She placed the name in the many books she owned. It was creepy and terrifying, when did she turn the apartment upside down. That's when I moved out after she haunted me in my dreams and felt she sent her ghost to hover in my house. Maybe it was too real in my head, I had to take her back.

I often sneaked around the house looking at my inheritance; namely. By no stretch of imagination, I could think of waking up to a new day without Val's voice, or her pretty face. It stung me so much that I cried sometimes, I pleaded with her no to leave me, I apologized so she couldn't kill herself and get me jailed.

I want to hold her now and tell her everything will be okay even if I have no idea of how I will better myself. But I know we will prevail. I'm focused. I think about her so much. Is it a criminal to think so much about a person? I want to heal the broken pieces and touch her soul back to life. I know she won't take credit for her broken heart but I know she's broke. I broke her, but now I want to mend her. Help her heal. Help her help me be okay.

***

Her curly, long hair was the color of the flaming sun, her long skirt sprawled on the couch. One arm was thrown across her waist, eyes scanning the environment. I opened the door to the cafe and swallowed hard when our eyes met. This day had come too fast and u wasn't sure what I was going to say. She smiled and waved.

I walked straight to her table, took her hand without having to talk much, she stood and followed me outside. My heart was furiously pounding against my chest. I wish we were under that big leafed tree in the cliff. That place made me have memories, is where I will be okay.

"Slow down," She pilulled me back and said as soon as we were outside the cafe. The bell at the door jingled behind us. "Don't you like this place?" I was visibly sweating and needed to calm myself down.

"I just thought maybe we could go somewhere I know and maybe..." I trailed off when her face turned from surprise to funny and she laughed. She laughed so heartily that I wanted to make her laugh more and more. But I had no more clever words.

"Of course we can go, but first it's my treat in this cafe. Let's go back because I already ordered us food." She was back in charge, her usual bossy self. I narrowed my eyes at her but followed her back inside. I sat quietly looking at her eat, so collected, so beautiful, if today isn't the day, when?