55. Heroes & Villains

Angst fest has (mostly) come to an end. For now. Also, gold star to Andy for getting the creative juices flowing on this one!

Heroes & Villains

"Aren't you supposed to be writing?"

Castle lifted his head at the sound of his partner's voice, smiled broadly as she crossed to him, dropped one hand to rest on his shoulder.

He tilted his chin to steal a kiss from her lips, smiled against her. "I am."

She followed the strong lines of his arm down to the surface of the desk, to the lined page resting beneath his pen. "That's not what I meant."

"But I am writing," he pointed out.

She whacked him lightly upside the head. "Castle."

"I mean, Gina's already on me for the outline of the next book, so technically I should be writing."

"But?" she prompted.

Castle shrugged. "But it's not due for another few weeks, so I've got plenty of time."

"So I guess I can plan ahead for sleeping alone at the end of the month," Kate teased.

"That's not..."

"Because I'll be very surprised if you manage to get everything done without pulling an all-nighter."

In a moment of childishness he stuck his tongue out at her but she was faster, bent down to capture it lightly between her teeth. Castle's hand lifted to cup her jaw, guide her closer, but she pulled away, smirked teasingly.

"Don't put it out unless you plan to use it."

"Oh, I can think of plenty of ways to use it," he leered.

Kate patted his shoulder. "Not right now."

"And for the record," he continued, blowing right past her comment, "I don't always pull all-nighters."

"Castle." She pushed the journal aside, hopped up on the desk next to his chair. His hand automatically found the bare skin of her thigh, tracing higher and higher, fiddling with the hemline of her running shorts. Kate temporarily found herself losing her train of thought, closed her eyes and re-focused. "If overindulgence in caffeine and last-minute middle of the night writing binges are what it takes for you to write best sellers, then I can be a big girl and sleep alone for a couple of nights."

Well, hypothetically, she reminded herself.

"Have you been talking to my mother?"

"No, why?"

"Because that sounds an awful lot like something she might have told you about."

"It's not like I'm living with you and have experienced these scenarios or anything."

"It's so sexy when you're sarcastic."

He tried to tug her off the desk and into his lap but she wriggled out of his grasp, stood. "I'm all sweaty."

"Which is also totally sexy."

"Castle."

"You know, irritated Kate is pretty sexy as well."

She huffed a sigh, rolled her eyes. "I'm gonna go shower. I'll let you get back to your writing."

"It can wait," he protested, snagging her around the wrist. "Read with me."

She doubled back, couldn't help herself as she leaned down to brush a kiss to his cheek. "Let me shower, and then we can read, 'kay?"

He smiled against her. "Okay."

When Kate re-emerged a few minutes later, padded across the office and slid demurely into Castle's lap, he was just finishing the journal entry for the case they'd closed yesterday. He smiled at her, shifted to wrap an arm around her while using his other hand to flip back to the bookmark.

"You comfy?"

"Mmhmm," she murmured, reaching one hand out to smooth down the page.

Dear Kate,

It was so hard for me today. So hard for me not to grab you and kiss you and tell you how much I love you. To take us from writer and muse fighting crime to... well, writer and more-than-a-muse fighting crime. Like Ann and Paul.

Especially when they stepped into the elevator and kissed and I looked at you and you were biting your lower lip and trying not to get caught looking at me (which was not very successful, by the way, I totally noticed). I think I detected hints of a blush too, but I know you would vehemently deny that.

Long story short, I really, really, really wanted to kiss you.

It's strange. Not that I wanted to kiss you, because that's been the case since the day we met. And then I really did kiss you and I've been wanting to do it again and again and again since that night. But then this summer happened, and I never thought I'd have the chance to see you again, much less kiss you. When you came back, I wanted to be disgusted at myself for still wanting to kiss, you but I couldn't be because no matter how upset I was I still loved you.

But tonight... tonight, all of that almost seemed to fade away. Tonight, when we were watching them and talking about them as a writer and a muse... the parallels to you and me were unmistakable, and when I saw them kiss it seemed so real, so tangible for us, too. As though our chance had been renewed. When I saw you glancing at me and trying not to smile, I could tell you felt it as well.

It's there, Kate. It's somewhere in our future. I can feel it and now that you and I are back together in the precinct, I'm starting to believe in it again, too. In us.

I can't wait for our day to arrive.

Love,

Castle

"Can I tell you a secret?" Kate asked quietly, almost shyly.

"Sure." His eyes were bright blue and wide and eager, and Kate had to smile because he was just so exuberant and it was impossible for it not to be contagious.

"I almost kissed you that day."

His head jerked sharply. "Really?"

She nodded, teeth latching around her bottom lip, worriedly pulling it into her mouth. "Yeah. I felt it too, and I wanted to reassure you that waiting for me was the right decision."

"I always would've waited for you, Kate."

She smiled gently, rested a soothing hand on his arm. "I know. Or, well, I know that now. But my biggest fear during all those months was that you'd get tired of waiting and move on and I'd be left in the dust, hating myself for lying to you and not letting you know how I felt."

Those tumultuous few weeks popped into Kate's mind then, when Castle had pulled away without explanation, flaunted his dates in front of her and ditched her to hang out with another cop. It was another one of those things they'd never talked about because once they were together, it didn't seem important.

But since they'd been reading their journal, Kate understood how important it was that they actually talk things through. She wanted to ask him about those weeks now, curiosity very nearly getting the better of her, but she also knew that if she was patient it was bound to come up at some point in the journal.

So she pushed the thoughts away, leaned down to rest her head against his shoulder, her damp hair cool and wet against his shirt.

He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, smiled. "I'm never moving on from you. You're stuck with me for good."

Kate smiled softly as his right hand twined with her left, fingers tracing her bare ring finger. He released a deep breath and Kate's smile broadened as her mind traveled to what was most certainly his same train of thought.

Why hadn't he given her a ring yet?

Thoughts?