You are gay?

We had been searching for days without really finding anything. Much of the Spartackus engines were already running and still nothing. No sign of her.

My gaze was icy at the frightened boy who had been brought on board. A perfect coward who was very fond of attracting attention. The only thing that came to mind was that Spike had left Angel after discovering that she was not human.

Another idea still afflicted me more. She had read my documents left on the table. Damn it. I hadn't even kept the logbook.

The truth is a funny thing. People can lie or try to smooth things over, but it always ends up showing up.

- Not! I didn't leave Angie there. It had something in the cafeteria ...- Spike's eyes popped out of his sockets as he spoke.

I stopped dead with the outburst suffered. It was her tears and sobs that were killing me at that moment.

"My dear ..., I ..."

There was nothing to do. For the first time, I experienced the real fear of losing that girl.

And after all the confusion with Ravenack dominating her mind, my hopes were starting to fall.

I sighed with very little patience and with the urge to choke that kid. If the unfortunate man gave another one of his ways to pass out next to me, I swear this time would crash on the hard floor. I saw with disgust his hand that held my arm with an intimacy that had never given him.

-There are things out there ... I swear there are things out there ... My God! The city is abandoned. They all disappeared. And that inside the cafeteria ...

I rolled my eyes at Max with displeasure.

This was not how it should have been discovered.

For many centuries, ancient discussions about the need to preserve endangered breeds had finally shown that it was necessary to create a colony for our scientists to have a genome for hybridization processes.

The blue planet that glowed in space was a huge colony of genomes available for that. We could be very grateful for the Lemurians' intervention. Guardians under orders from the Confederation guarded the safety of living biological material.

-And Angel? Come on, you may know anything! I replied dryly. You must have seen ...

-I swear to you ... It was high. It wasn't monstrous. - Spike explained and gestured at the same time flustered. - And there were fangs ... God! It looked like a horror movie. He was half-man, half-animal.

I mumbled. So the mutant creatures were loose in the colony. Some failure in the security of the energy fences that held them in place had failed. It was bad news.

The planet was divided into several countries and each represented an ecosystem planned by scientists. There, guinea pigs were observed and studied. Occasionally, the capture process brought an uproar among them, especially when the lights and ships aroused unwanted attention.

-Right. Half man, half-animal ... Whatever. And the girl?

Max sighed beside me, mumbling.

-Can we assume that Lupan's lycanthropes are loose and out of control, then?

-Great! I muttered, thinking morbidly that the invasion was gaining its most detestable attractions.

Humans had learned that they were just legends. There was a universe forgotten and kept there from beasts so old that they had become stories. These were processes of mutation that the organism of our society had not been digested and rejected.

-Zorack. Spike called out to me with squeamish looks. - I swear to you that I didn't abandon Angel. There were lights. The sound of engines and the intense light ... I swear to you for everything that is more sacred than a ship.

I stared at him wordlessly with the insides turning inside. Lights!

For all that was most sacred. Of course, I knew how everyone who opportunistic smugglers always tried to capture human guinea pigs in that quadrant, circumventing the safety of Lemurians.

I left the bridge, tired of the pressure and everything. And it was by no means the K'Aldriants that worried me. Deserted cities and few people were seen all over the planet with the hateful black and fierce gaze.

My mind was filled with guilt.

"You should have told her the truth, shouldn't you?"

It was the third day of unsuccessful searches and I was mulling over the past and memories like a convict.

What is a woman's reaction when she finds out that her partner has homosexual desires? Angel had the mentality of any human. I even hoped for a certain moralism and prejudice.

All I lacked was a loving and sexual conflict. I know perfectly well why I didn't confess my feelings for that girl. Klaus.

Our relationship was full of ups and downs. Every time I swore was gaining her trust ...

Why the hell had she asked me how I felt about her?

Don't ever say to a woman who is just horny or lustful. They always want more than that.

-Who's Klaus? - Angel's voice haunted me.

The question fell with the effect of a bomb between us. Especially after having ignored the simple question. Do you love Me?

It could only have been courtesy of Scarlet.

Damn it! When sexual material is explored at the deepest levels ... Humans were still very attached to ancient beliefs. The world is not flat, I'm fine. The sun does not revolve around the Earth.

Sexual desires could cause half of the people to desire both sexes. It's eroticism. Sexuality.

-Someone I met. - my answer said loudly and with the silent warning that it was a strict limit for me. They clearly said: I don't want to talk about it.

Angel wasn't going to make it easy. Ah, she never made it easy. Never make a woman suspicious ...

It was ... she took a deep breath and I stared at her mercilessly.

I really wanted to know the word she would use. Gay? Homosexual? How did Angel view it?

Rays! Are we really going to discuss the permissiveness of the social environment?

Suddenly I was on alert. What would be your reaction? Break up a messy relationship between the two of us?

I had a sexual desire for that girl to hallucinate, but I also felt the need to have sex with other men. Our civilization in Édrin had very different directions from Earth in this regard.

-He died. - I was even drier.

Even after so long, it's still too hard for me to talk about Klaus. It was an unhealed wound.

I had no doubts about my sex drive. And it wasn't even a question of a bisexual adventure.

I knew that my kisses had the same warmth and sting as always from Angel's satisfied moans. And I always wondered why her hesitation when it came to sex.

What difference could there be? After everything, she and I had done and tried ...

Apart from my awkwardness the first time ... Damn it! Angel didn't seem the least bit tempted to complain about my attentions.

I didn't care at all about Terran standards. It was in chemistry. I wanted every opportunity to touch Angel and ...

- Is that you...

Angel stopped more indecisively without knowing how to choose the words and embarrassed. Shit! I can almost feel her thoughts. Her confusion. She was sharing a bed with me on a torrid and wonderful trail of pleasures and didn't know how to explain the possibility to her family or friends.

And I controlled myself, taking a deep breath. This was important to her.

Only if she showed any disappointment or made it clear that she had made the wrong choice ...

-You are you...

-Bitch who gave birth! Say it with all the damn words. Klaus was a man. Is that what you want to know? A human. My lover. I never showed you that I wasn't available for sex, made excuses or showed disinterest

Was I really defending myself?

Angel bit her lip apprehensively.

-Is something wrong with me? And when you're with me, when we're ... we're ... Damn, Zorack. The fantasy that is fucking Klaus when you are with me?

I looked at her, trying not to laugh. The matter was too serious. At least for her. I saw it in Angel's way. And also because of the irritating detail that she, in the confusion of her emotions, had managed to block her mind for me.

-You ... you ... are you gay?

Gay ?! I gritted my teeth. There was an infallible tactic to find this out. I crossed my arms trying to explain it to her. . It was enough to throw that withering look, a good chat and the person to return. The game was beginning.

With straight people, it was quite different. Most of the times with a lot of education the climate was cut. A closeted lesbian would prolong the conversation, or let you in and even feel flattered.

It was a simple question of radar. And bingo! The way of a look, a smile ...

-Not! I'm not gay. Are you worried about the disapproval of humans? Or just caring why he was special?

Curse of curses! Everyone is born bisexual. It is the social environment that directs the sexual option to the heterosexual side. Many men are vainer than women. And they are not gay.

It's the usual story. It doesn't matter the sex, planet or race.

Betrayal has no forgiveness. The fact is that with or without forgiveness, men and women react differently.

I was beginning to notice that it was not the physical part of sex itself that disturbed Angel with any relief. It was the emotional bond I had with Klaus.

Hell! I was not cheating on the girl. Klaus was dead. Everything is complicated with women. They must always justify an emotional connection. Most. And then this betrayal easily becomes a relationship that is not temporary.

-Did you love this Klaus? - Angel spoke so softly that I had difficulty hearing.

-But of course, I did. I answered quickly. What did you expect me to feel?

My hard look said exactly what I thought. Damn it, Angel. He is dead. Dead. I really don't want to talk about it, with you., Stubborn woman. You're the most annoying girl I've ever met and yet I ...

- Did you love Klaus? But not me?

I did not like the quick association she made.

was not yet ready to admit that he loved Angel.

-Oh! I did not say that! Not quite. Forget that love nonsense. I'm by your side, aren't I? There is no reason to complain about my indifference. With Scarlet it was just sex ... You are ...

The tear-shining eyes were my defeat.

-Would you like me to say that to you? I can guarantee that I wouldn't like it. Angel spat the words in my face and the tone was that of a wounded animal.

-Is different!

-Because? Why are you a man? Does that give you the right to do what you want? I ... I ... thought ...

I mumbled at the limit. What harm was there a simple fuck? It was just a matter of physical contact and pleasure. Things were very different with women. There was a fundamental question of involvement. I didn't like the thought of Angel involved with anyone else.

- It's really different. Only...

Was I really going to have to explain that? Angel's way was giving me no alternative. I was able to grasp in the words that had not been spoken among us that the question of affection was of tremendous importance.

-Take your hands off me. - Angel shouted and walking away when I showed initiative to approach me. You are an arrogant miserable without feelings that... I can't believe I fell in love with someone like that! I hate you!

I stopped dead with the outburst suffered. It was her tears and sobs that were killing me at that moment.

-My dear ..., I ...

There was nothing to do. For the first time, I experienced the real fear of losing that girl.

And after all the confusion with Ravenack dominating her mind, my hopes were starting to fall.