Chapter 7 : Bad Humor

Still Tuesday morning, the church, Xin Jian's pov, class time, Xin Jian is the teacher (?) :

I am not at all using a monocle during class time to test whether it will really create ripples in fate and make Amon come. Not at all.

I am just an ignorant little girl that randomly put a monocle on her right eye to seem serious (and accustom Klein to monocles before he gets monocle ptsd by the way).

Oh, and maybe to scare Pallez by putting on a monocle for no reason. (I think it worked ?)

Ahem. So, we were in the church and I was teaching Klein as usual (Leonard is present so am I teaching Leonard too ? But why do I feel like I'm making him teach more things to Klein than I am teaching him ? Isn't he just doing my work in my stead ? *shrugs shoulders*) Now that I think about it, I think that my reputation as an honorable (fake) angel is gone. (Well, technically Klein is an angel too…)

« So, today I'll be teaching about an aspect really important of ritualistic magic. »

Amanises : Why do I get a bad feeling ?

I began :

« Ritualistic magic needs a clean spiritual environment where you will not be disturbed.

The first step for the performer is to enter Cogitation. Focus your mind and draw out your strength, construct it around with the supplementary items, such as a silver dagger.

Throughout the entire process, you have to confirm the symbolism and corresponding incantation. Incantations are best done in Hermes. »

I did not use The Fool as a wiki. Not at all.

« Anyway, Leonard should have already explained that to you. »

Or else he is really useless.

Leonard winked.

« Yes, my beautiful lady. »

Sh- I forgot that he was that type of person. (Author : around chapter 50 ?)

Wait until Klein dies, it will really change you.

Wait, no. I did not come to Backlund for Klein to die !

« Why are you saying the obvious ? Of course I'm beautiful. So, today, I will show you a type of ritualistic magic that will really help you when you're in need in the future. »

Klein listened attentively.

« It's simple : if you want money, ask the goddess with ritualistic magic. »

Leonard : « Pfft- »

Klein : « Is that allowed ?? »

Of course not, but most of the prayers are dealt with automatically anyway like Old Neil's debt of 30 pounds and Old Neil isn't there to teach that to Klein, so…. I just modified it bit ? (-> settling a debt of 30 pounds became asking money to the goddess)

« Yes~, of course~. Now, Leonard, come ask 50 pounds to the goddess. »

I handed him the candles.

After I made Leonard show blasphemy, (Klein is shocked) I looked at Klein with a complicated gaze (in my head, since my gaze still seemed cold and indifferent).

« Why are you looking at me like you thought I was a moron ? I may not look like it, but I am very smart. »

Klein just nodded.

I'm pretty sure you don't believe me, though…

I searched through my pocket.

Wow, a random piece of paper. Let's fold it in four before taking it out.

« Look at that (random) piece of paper. If I can give it to Leonard and make him accept it, then it will prove that I am smart. Of course, I am forbidden to use Beyonder abilities while doing that. Okay ? »

Klein nodded.

« Hmm… You do know that I heard you, right ? » said Leonard

I smiled. *Cale's scammer smile.jpg*

« Of course, or else it wouldn't be fun~. »

I added :

« So, don't you want to accept it to prove that I'm smart ?

- No.

- Would you want to sign-

- No.

- You do know that throwing away paper pollutes ?

- …

Klein : Are you sure you can do it ?

« You do know that I am extremely persistent and I will continue until you accept ?

- …

- Inside, there are banknotes.

- Won't I have 50 pounds soon thanks to the goddess anyway ?

- No, no. At most divine punishment. So, would you like to read high level mysticism knowledge ?

- …

- Oh ! And Mr. Dunn Smith gave you a new mission.

- What is it ?

- To take this paper.

- …

- This is a potion formula.

- …

- This paper contains some secrets of the world…

- …

- It is a card of blasphemy !

- …

- One of my Beyonder abilities needs to use paper, are you sure you don't want to take it away from me to make me unable to use one of my Beyonder abilities ?

- …

- In fact, this is a very powerful sealed artifact, are you sure you don't want to bring it back to the church to gain contribution ?

- …

- This is part of the Antigonus family notebook.

- At least settle on one use for that paper ! »

True.

I put down my arm and sighed :

« No, that's just… »

Leonard deadpanned.

Hey, can you at least listen ?

« The reason I had this paper in my pocket was to give it to you. »

*Leonard doesn't understand.jpg*

*Me making up a sad story involving dead people that Leonard knew*

(Author : You're trash-

Xin Jian : I know~.)

After at least 3 minutes, I think that even I was convinced by what I was saying.

Wow, my ability to make up bullshit is as good as ever 👍.

But Leonard still refused to take the paper.

I shook my head.

« Well, I'm pretty sure that with only a little push I could make you take the paper with that story but I won't. In truth, it's not because of that that I have this paper with me. Of course, my Beyonder abilities do not include paper either, it was just a potion formula of the sleepless pathway sequence 7 Nightmare. We can't have you be useless in a team of angels, right ? »

I smiled gently with a playful gaze.

(Poor guy didn't realize that the only time my facial expressions change is when I am acting or lying.)

« Also, I'm sure that you wouldn't have ever taken the paper since you were determined not to take it whatever the tentation is. But still, I tempted you, right ? You should agree that you would have taken it if you didn't hear me talk to Klein before. Can't we say that I won ? »

I raised my hand to ask for a handshake.

Seeing him hesitating, I smiled and added

« You were a tough opponent. »

He finally took my hand.

I retrieved my hand and concluded.

« Thank you. Also, don't worry. I intended to give you the potion formula whether I win or not. »

I handed him the paper and went to Klein.

-> Leonard was successfully fooled and Klein was speechless.

« What ? Didn't I say that I should give it to him and he has to accept it ? I didn't use any Beyonder abilities either. I gave it to him and he accepted it, didn't I win ? Also, it's not like I scammed him since he had already said that I won. »

Klein finally opened his mouth.

« What was really on the paper ? »

That's a good question !

« Well, it's highly likely that's it's blank, or else it's a memo. Why don't you ask Leonard ? »

In short, I do not know either.

He nodded.

I'm curious too… What the hell did I give to Leonard ?

« So, what is the potion formula sequence 7 of the sleepless pathway ? »

I shrugged my shoulders.

I do not know. I you want to know, please buy it in my stead and show it to me.

« So, what did you learn from what I showed you just now ? »

Klein thought for a while then said :

« The more you let a scammer speak, the higher the probability of being fooled is. »

That's right !

« Uh ? No, it's that I'm smart, since I won… »

In truth, I figured that you wouldn't believe me if I just said that I'm smart and you could ask me to prove it, so I just put forward a method for me to prove myself first to be at an advantage.

Are you wondering why Leonard's external brain let him get scammed ?

(No he didn't go to sleep because he was scared when I suddenly put on a monocle, but that's still a good plan.)

What if he had a reason to let Leonard take it ?

(After all, why would Leonard be quiet when I went to speak to Klein after giving him the paper other than talking with Pallez ?)

I have authority of the gray fog and I was curious…

In the past, why did Pallez take the coin imbued with the power of Sefirah castle ? What use does it have ?

So I just imbued the paper with the power of the gray fog at the beginning to ask him this question.

—————— I am the dividing line~

Tuesday afternoon :

Since he is still learning, Klein is not given any mission for the time being (and me neither or else I'd be screwed since I have no Beyonder powers and they would definitely give me a mission at the angel level…). Maybe they could give Klein a mission if they are short of manpower and there is an emergency since sequence 6 is still a high sequence Beyonder. When he has digested the potions until sequence 6, we will need to go to sea to find mermaids to unlock his Beyonder powers of sequence 5. Or let's just ask the church for the mermaids ? At least he is lucky since he doesn't need to spend money on Beyonder materials until sequence 1… except maybe for the rituals.

What did I do this afternoon ?

Of course, I kidnapped Klein, Arrodes and Ice cream-chan to see Will.

« Arrodes, where is Will Auceptin ? »

I have decided ! I must add "create worldwide chaos" in my to do list.

Also, why is it Ice cream"-chan" ? Can't it be Ice cream-kun ? What is the gender of ice cream ?

I don't know. Let's ask Will.

We arrived at the house where Will lives.

« Klein, can you create an illusion so that we are invisible ? »

Klein nodded.

Then I entered and said :

« Please stay here and make sure nobody disturbs us. Just use your Beyonder abilities if necessary. »

Of course, Klein's presence is just to "threaten" Will since I'm not a true angel.

Next time I really shouldn't introduce myself as an angel when I am not one… Shouldn't gods notice it ? Then why did Amanises not correct my joke ?! ToT.

I took the ice cream with me and saw Will.

At least it seems like he didn't intend to avoid me or else I couldn't have met him.

« What is it ? » asked the child

I showed a serious expression.

« I came here to ask something important. »

Will put on a serious look too.

I said :

« What is the gender of ice cream ?? »

Will was dazed.

There was a moment of silence.

Seeing that he didn't intend to answer, I changed the subject.

« So, do you want to join the Tarot club ? I have ice cream. »

« You didn't intend to convince me with only ice cream, did you ? »

The last time you said a thing like that to Klein, you still accepted his request.

« No, this is only a token of my sincerity. If you refuse, I will only call in the sequence one outside the door to convince you anyway. »

« Did you really think I would not notice that the guy outside the door can only use his Beyonder powers up to sequence 6 and doesn't even have an angelic personality ? »

Well, yes.

I gave him the ice cream which I still didn't know the gender of then explained :

« Ahem. The Tarot club is a gathering with ordinary Beyonders and some gods organized inside Sefirah Castle. Which means that we could help you to escape from Ouroboros, give you some more ✨ice cream✨, help you accommodate the wheel of fate uniqueness and help you deal with some matters in the Rose School of Thought… »

Will : Why are you emphasizing ice cream ?

Will said :

« How can I believe you ? »

I said raised my arms to the sky and affirmed proudly :

« I have ✨ice cream✨. »

(Author : The ice cream is melting…

Xin Jian : Well, Klein's Beyonder abilities couldn't preserve the ice cream on the way…)

No, seriously.

I pointed to the door and said :

« The guy waiting there should have the aura of Sefirah Castle, isn't that proof enough ? And, me too. You can even ask the goddess if you want. »

Will asked the deadly question :

« Which goddess ? »

Shut up. (Of course it is the goddess of sleepy flowers~)

« Both. » I said.

Okay, maybe this question is the main reason I wanted to bring Lilith in the Tarot club too. Wait, are there other goddesses in the orthodox gods ? If there are only two, isn't it a little sexist ?

Will was finally convinced and followed the choice that fate guided him to since I came here- (which He could have done since the beginning !)

« Ok. »

Then I went out.

« Klein, you can go home and rest for the rest of the day. »

*Klein doesn't understand what he was doing.jpg*

No, Klein. I can see what you're thinking but trespassing into others' houses isn't suspicious at all. (And that's not the first time I'm doing it…)

How do you the Nighthawks come to interrogate others in their dreams at night ? Of course, they trespass into others' houses.

I made an excuse.

« That was a mission from the goddess. »

And please don't ask which one…

Oh my, I just lied about god's words. I want the title of blasphemer too !

After I sent Klein home, I asked Arrodes :

« So, Arrodes. You're my only hope now. What is the gender of ice cream ? »

*Arrodes is speechless.jpg*

—————— I am the dividing line~

Before beginning what I wanted to do, I went up the gray fog to speak to Mr. Fool.

« Hello ! »

« Good afternoon, Xin Jian. »

What the heck. Are you so bored ? What are you drinking tea…

« Orange juice please. »

I sat down while he pulled an historical projection of orange juice.

Wait, I thought you didn't have your Beyonder abilities anymore ?

I shook my head.

« Mr. Fool, I wanted to create my own blasphemy slate (since knowledge is power, you know…) so I came to freely exploit your knowledge. »

(Author : Xin Jian always words it like that on purpose…)

« Pfft- »

Mr. Fool sprayed tea.

What ? Didn't you say that my presence helped you maintain human nature ? Be grateful.

I reached out my hand.

« Now, hand over your potion formulas. Right now. »

And he did.

See ? It's really strange that He is so obedient. There's something fishy here…

I shrugged my shoulders then lay down and began to carve the potion formulas on a flat rock I brought.

« You know, the blasphemy slate wasn't "literally" made on a slate. There was also the sea of chaos involved… »

I turned to Mr. Fool.

« So what ? Let's just plunge that rock in the sea of chaos and all's good. »

Mr. Fool didn't pursue the matter any longer and just felt that He would be the one who would have to plunge the rock in the sea of chaos in the future.

*Mr. Fool has mixed feelings.jpg*

To resume, we have :

- Sequence 9 to 0 of the Fool pathway

- Sequence 9 to 0 of the Black Emperor pathway

- Sequence 9 to 0 of the Tyrant pathway

- Sequence 7 and 6 of the Demoness pathway

- Sequence 8 and 2 of the Door pathway

- Sequence 9, 8, 7, 5 and 4 of the Visionary pathway

- Sequence 9 to 4 of the Sun pathway

- The description of the abilities as well as the names of all sequences and the mythical biological forms of all pathways…

- And some other incomplete potion formulas and rituals

Well, I just realized that there are 220 different sequences so 220 different potion formulas… I should just find a way to make money instead of taking Klein's. What's more, Klein is poor.

Or I could just spy on a Beyonder gathering with Mr. Fool and get some potion formulas freely…That's also an option.

I know 45/220 potion formulas, only 175 left ! (I'm glad that Mr. Fool already knows so much potion formulas…)

For the incomplete formulas, they are mainly incomplete because the auxiliary materials are missing…

I guess I just have to ask other gods, threaten other gods, search for Adam and His true blasphemy slate, (threaten) make a deal with Adam, or find 19 cards of blasphemy then ! (Wait, let's just ask Roselle.)

It just seems a bit simple to propose to Roselle to join the Tarot Club and hand over all of his potions formulas in exchange for removing his corruption while letting Him meet Bernardette first as a token of my sincerity…

I guess I just have to find another long term plan.

So, the question is, how to create worldwide chaos while you are lazy ?

What I will do this afternoon is already a good idea.

After that, I guess that showing my fake blasphemy slate to the world and announcing it as the third could also work. Or announcing the real names of angels and gods in the newspaper…

After a moment of silence with orange juice, I asked :

« Mr. Fool, you're lived very long, right ?

- Yes.

- And you're knowledgeable, right ?

- Yes.

- Then… »

I looked at him in the eyes.

« What is ice cream's gender ? »

Mr. Fool was speechless.

After a moment of silence, he answered solemnly :

« It's female. »

I had an unsure expression.

« Really ? »

He nodded.

« Yes. Definitely. »

If you say so…

I think Mr. Fool is better at saying bullshit than me… Can you also tell the logical-sounding explanation behind it ?

« Why ? » I asked.

« Spiritual intuition. »

Wow, your spiritual intuition sure is strange…

« Can I keep the future 3rd blasphemy slate here ? »

Mr. Fool nodded.

« Is it possible for me to walk as a spirit body too ? »

Mr. Fool said yes and explained the ceremony to me.

« Thank you~. »

So I left, reproduced the ceremony just taught to me and went to the slums thanks to the directions I asked Arrodes prior to this.

A lot of time later~

So, that's really amazing that ordinary people can see me even as a spirit body. At most, this disguise was to counter divination. I put on a disguise before doing the ceremony to look like a different person.

I took out the posters I was carrying in my spirit body and pasted them on the walls.

(Posters with the honorific name of the Fool on it ; honorific name which points to both Klein and Mr. Fool since they are the same person but we decided to let Klein handle the prayers which didn't involve gods or angels -if he doesn't deal with the prayers he can't sleep anyway-, while Mr. Fool lets me handle gods and angels when I go above the gray fog)

In truth, it would be so awkward if me and Klein went above the gray fog at the same time…

I then stopped someone and said :

« Hello. If you are ever desperate, you pray to our lord. He is… »

And I preached the Fool in the slums and different districts while pasting his honorific name everywhere until evening…

Now I can't ever do it again or else the official Beyonders will come to arrest me immediately…

I ended the summoning.

Well, I had already asked Amanises to let her church be indifferent to the propagation of the honorific name of The Fool.

Wednesday morning :

First thing in the morning, I woke up earlier than Leonard and knocked at his door one hour earlier than he usually gets up.

(I don't even remember why it is on my to do list but this is fun~.)

« Leonard, get up~. »

I opened the door.

« Xin Jian, you do know that before I was a midnight poet the sequence 9 of my pathway is sleepless, right ? »

Tch, nobody sleeps here.

I have to cross out "wake up Leonard every morning" from my to do list.

« Well, now, I'm awake. Take responsibility ! » I exclaimed.

« What ? »

(Author : I repeat, Xin Jian is wording it like that on purpose.)

« I said, take responsibility ! »

Leonard was confused and saw him look away, seemingly embarrassed.

Wow, so he REALLY is imagining something ambiguous.

I smirked.

If so, what will happen if approach now~?

I went toward his bed and saw him blush slightly.

Then, I leaned forward, putting and mouth next to his ear and murmured :

« So… »

Wow, Leonard became a tomato~. I knew it, our poet is a virgin~. (Well, me too.)

« …prepare breakfast. »

I concluded then went out.

« Huh ? »

*Leonard is confused.jpg*

Pallez : … (looking at Leonard with exasperated eyes)

Interesting, interesting.

Outside the door, I had a faint smile while I was laughing in my head.

It's so bad Roselle is not here now or else I could have showed Him my jokes et we would have laughed together.

Or not.

So, when is Leonard going out to prepare breakfast ? I'm hungry !

« Leonard, I said to take responsibility and prepare breakfast ! »

Leonard returned to his senses and went to the kitchen. Then Klein joined us even though it was 5 am. As expected, nobody sleeps here, huh ?

« Wow, Xin Jian got up early ? » asked Klein

« I wanted to wake up Leonard but he is a sleepless. » I said with a sad look.

Klein nodded as if it was exactly the kind of things that I would do.

Well, it is but I would appreciate it if you saw me as a respectable person, you know ?

When we finished eating, instead of going to the church, I stopped them.

« No, no. There is no class today. Klein must go out to digest his potion. »