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People pleaser

Chapter one

I'm a people pleaser, and i almost lost my life because of this, it all started when i was (3) three years ago I don't have a say on my own, can't say no to people opinion, always embracing what people have to say, there's this emotional need i have to please others often even at the expense of my own needs or desire and this makes me go. Crazy sometimes because i can't take care of myself being a people pleaser. At the age of 16 the pressure was getting worsed, my family doctor, doctor bulus tries to make things better, he often say that been a people pleaser lead to emotional and mental health problems, which i think is true, because i always get too emotional sometimes and forget myself by not thinking straight at all. Dr bulus tried to help me but couldn't so i just have to embrace what am met to be. This how you know you are a people pleaser, a pleaser is someone who tries hard to make others happy, they can tend to do anything possible to avoid conflict even it means turning into an entirely different person. People pleaser need validation from others to feel good about themselves.

I was a loner, and i loved being a loner, i just enjoyed being alone, because i find happiness in doing that. Back then in my high school nobody noticed me, i just kept to myself and i hardly spoke in class. I enjoyed the lack of attention i get from people because I didn't know how to say NO to people, i prefer giving out my last pen to someone who doesn't have one while i suffer inside me.

My mom tried to encourage me to make friends but I was just not interested,everything changed when a new girl came to my school named nancy.

I knew she would be so troubled the at first time i saw her, she was light skinned and beautiful, very skinny and had perfect face, the first thing you see when you look at her is her long black shiny hair and her pointed nose ofcourse, well i don't know why girls are so obsessed with long hair maybe it cool tho. Every girl at school wanted to be her friend or even become more than a friend to her like sisters. She became very popular at school in no time because of her beauty and the way people gets to talk about her every now and then.

Whenever you see nancy you see two or more girls hanging around her trying to be her best friend, so you can imagine my shock when she approached me of all people at lunch break, she introduced herself to me as the new girl, as if everybody in school don't know she was, apparently she lived in my neighborhood and wanted to walk  home with me.

I should have said no and stay far away from her but i agreed, even though I really didn't want to work home with her, it was kinda difficult to say no because i didn't want her to feel bad.