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I hadn't always been this weak person, this broken person. I was my pack's alpha's pride and joy. My daddy had taught me how to look after our people. I used to wear beautiful clothes, and I dreamed of being a doctor. When I did, I dreamt of my own surgery practice. My family and pack loved me. Then there was that fateful day, the day everything went poof.

I didn't know it when I woke up that day.

At the time, I thought everything was okay. After all, what 15-year-old werewolf doesn't think she and her pack is invincible?

That was the same day I believe fate loathed me. The reason I am convinced fortune will never shine in my favor again. Why would she? She took it all away and Wiped out every single thing I had ever loved in one swift kick—the day when the alpha killed them all and took me as their trophy.

The last one living in the red pack. The alpha's daughter, now a mongrel.

(5 years later)

I lay in the sun, warming my skin through the curtains. I loved this blissful state between sleep and just waking up. It reminds me that I am alive and surviving.

I sigh and roll over in bed, laughing when I see the birthday present Jeremy had left on the floor. It was a giant round fluffy cat plushie with a birthday hat that barely fit on his chubby face. Jeremy had been my best friend for the last eleven years. He was the alpha's son and was always kind to me. He didn't treat me like a mongrel like everyone else did, just like his brother did before he left. He would smile at me and tend to my bruises and breaks when his father hit me too hard. He had gone away to college when I turned 18 and always regretted not being there. His family had gotten worse with each beating. That day when he found me collapsed by the locked door. He swore to himself that He was done.

He took me and left.

He was deserting the people in his pack. Every time I asked if he regretted it. He'd laugh and say, "fuck em, you're my family." I never had, and I knew without a doubt in my mind that he would always have my back.

With his infectious happiness, I think he saw the broken soul inside me and decided he would be my medication and heal the wounds his pack had caused. Since we ran away, he was by my side with every up and every down.

I know he felt somewhat guilty for what happened. It was unjustified, but it was there. I could see it sometimes in his eyes when we spent time together, with a few bottles of wine between us.

Jeremy quickly became successful, and now he was on his way to even bigger things. He wasn't overly tall, just six feet, with a lean runner's body: Sandy brown hair and light brown eyes. Most girls would end up hitting on him, But Jeremy would politely decline. While he would tell them he had no interest in dating, which wasn't exactly true, he just had no interest in dating women.

When Jeremey left for college, his pack downright terrified me.

The beatings didn't start until about six months into being classed as a mongrel. I had a conversation with Jeremy. When I was supposed to pick up the beta laundry, I thought I could be in and out before anyone noticed. But, their pack sees everything.

They weren't always bad at First; It was mainly just verbal, a slap here and there for whatever offense they deemed beat-worthy.

Closing my eyes, trying to shake the thoughts,

I know I have worked hard to become who I am today. With the help of Dr. Emerick (and Jeremy, of course), I have slowly become a better version of myself.

It hasn't been easy. I can't hear "mongrel." without it taking me back to the dark. But. At the same time, I had finally healed enough to start moving on. I managed to get an internship as a nurse, Finally able to help someone else.

Not long ago, my duo became a trio the day we met johnny.

They ended up being my brothers, and we formed bonds so tight that they would be almost impossible to break.

Johnny and Jeremy. They looked out for me and didn't shy away from nights spent watching chick flicks and eating junk food.

I met Johnny the day I was released from the hospital after a month-long stay, healing from the last beating the alpha gave me. Jeremy had been there to pick me up so he sat by my side.

Guilt kept my eyes down. Until a man walked into the hospital room, he was a skinny thin man. I remember that looked up into his stormy grey eyes and knew he was an alpha.

He was a tall man, easily a foot over my five foot three. I immediately shrunk in submission, hoping it wasn't noticeable, but nothing escaped his eyes. He carefully changed the expression on his face. "Don't you worry, miss, we've got you under our care now." I don't know what it was about him, but when I met Johnny, all it took was those words to set me at ease instantly.

The only one I missed from the pack was Ryan.

I remember the moments lying on the grass in the woods. I would get lost in him. He made me feel like somebody. He was the alpha's eldest son and wanted me as a person. He never treated me like his parents did and taught jeremy to treat me the same, made him promise no matter what to protect me. He loved and protected me beyond anything else. I fell in love with this boy when I thought I couldn't ever love again.

I loved feeling his strong heart beating under my ear. It calmed the anxiety in me.

"Baby, quit it. I'll be back before you know it, and I will be back to get my girl." I hear him gently growl, knowing exactly what is running through my mind.

We've been lying in the grass for hours, getting lost in each other's eyes.

He shifts under me, sliding out from under my body and rolling onto his side, facing me. I look into his bright, black eyes again, smiling at him. He is perfect, with thick messy blonde hair sticking up in disheveled curls. I trace my finger along his thick lips. I love to get lost in His lips twitch into that lazy grin.

"What are you thinking about, baby?"

"You are leaving me here with them; you are the only one that keeps me sane. They all treat me like a slave. Do you promise to come back to me?" I ask him, with tears coming into my eyes.

"Just try and keep me away." He says, leaning in to kiss me gently.

But once he left, he was gone, and his heart never returned to me and he dissapeared, no one ever found out where he was.

But that was the past. After fully waking up, I rolled out of bed, and flur lay on my bed stretching out in the sun, purring away to herself. Looking at the silver clock ticking away on the wall, I shook my head at the time I'd slept through the morning.

How the hell did I sleep this late? Jeremy and Johnny, that's how I slept this late. They better have breakfast ready. I was starving.

What did I let them talk me into last night? The last thing I remember is Johnny coming home from work with a giant paper bag in his arms, screaming "delivery." They knew me, and they knew exactly what I needed. So, instead of letting me drink myself stupidly alone, they joined in.

Walking over to my desk and grabbing my phone, I look down at my phone calendar. Yup, still January 15th. My 27th birthday. Also, the twelfth anniversary of what is still the worst day of my life.

Getting into the shower and sudding up, my mind begins to wander back to that day.