Exausted

You doesn't know that feeling, right ?

When it burn in your whole soul, because you're so tired and exausted of being hurt that you just have to delete all of your emotions so you doesn't feel that pain, even if it's just for some second.

And you're just dying.

In my case, I'm dying so hard and for so long now that I forgot people can be happy. The only smile I get is when I laugh to your bullshits, and it's a fake one.

And I know I will never be happy again, and it's fine but tell me..

For what it is good for to trying to be happy, when all your smiles are fake and when you can't even share this to someone 'cause nobody will understand you ?

Tell me, why am I alive ? Family ? They doesn't care. Friends ? I have none, you see ? I can't even find a reason myself, my heart is too dirty to accept me alive..

I should die.

Why, but why not ?

I have nothing to offer, nothing to give.

That's the only way for me to find peace, can you imagine ?

Oh yeah right, you can't.

Because you doesn't know that feeling.

.

18/02/2020