Chapter 17: A Change

The minutes slowly rolled by while Marigold sat on her bed thinking to herself, 'I was screaming again, screaming in my sleep because of my father… But why, why was I screaming for Beau? How could I want someone who doesn't even care about me or my feelings? He took me away from my home, he put me here and yet I find myself wanting him around… Why, why am I feeling this way? I don't want to feel this way about Beau, and I don't want him to know I feel this way about him. I have to push him away… I can't lose sight of what he did to me." 

Half an hour passed, and Carls entered the room, holding a silver tray with breakfast for Marigold on it, saying, "Good morning, Miss Marigold." On the breakfast tray there were pancakes on a white plate, a small glass cup of syrup sitting next to the pancakes (on the plate), a napkin that had a fork and knife sitting on top of it, a tall glass of orange juice sitting next to the plate, and a white saucer that had 2 sausage links on it. She smelled the aroma of pancakes and sausage while feeling her stomach rumble. He walked over to her, handing her the tray while she took it. She began eating, and he said, "I hope you were able to sleep better after Master Beau came back." She stopped eating, glaring at her plate, thinking, 'He knows that I wanted Beau with me. He probably thinks I have feelings for Beau, but I don't… I can't… I can't love a man who forced me to marry him, who disregarded all of my feelings to benefit himself. No, I can't fall in love with a man like that. I can't let Beau play me… I won't let Beau play me." Carls said, "Is everything alright, Miss Marigold," and she looked up at him, saying, "I had a horrible sleep with him in the room. He completely disrupted me. He ruined my night's sleep. I can't stand the sight of him. He makes me sick. Never allow him to come into my room ever again! I don't want him in here while I'm sleeping, I don't want him touching me." Carls said, "Miss Marigold, you wouldn't calm down without Master Beau… You kept screaming his name and…" She interrupted him, saying, "I would never scream his name, ever! I don't want to have anything to do with him. He is a cruel hearted man! He's very cold, and he doesn't care about anyone else other than himself! Look what he did to me, Carls. I hate him, I hate him, and I don't want him looking at me, let alone touching me. The thought of him being in my room turns my stomach." Carls said, "Now Miss Marigold, you have vented to me about Master Beau for over a month now. I understand that you are angry at Master Beau, and you are entitled to feel angry, but you have to understand that Master Beau had nothing to do with this marriage contract. He didn't even want to get married. He was only doing what his father said… Master Beau, never knew that you would be the one he would be marrying. When he told his father about you, it was because you intrigued him. You were the first woman to see him as a person instead of a money bag. He never wanted to hurt you. Now you are Master Beau's wife, and he is trying his best to make sure you have everything he can give to you. He's trying his best. Please, Miss Marigold, give him a chance." She scoffed, saying, "A chance? A chance to do what? After everything that he's done, after everything he's put me through, you want me to give him a chance? Why should I give him one? He is self-centered, and he doesn't care about me or my feelings! He doesn't even like me. He's just using me until he gets what he wants, and he's pretending that he cares about me when, in reality, he doesn't. He's just another user and abuser and he's just waiting to toss me off to the side like yesterday's trash!" Carls sighed, saying, "I understand… I understand now… Miss Marigold, there are a lot of bad people in this world, and you have had a lot of bad things happen to you. You have been treated in the worst possible ways. People haven't really put you first. You've always had to be the one thinking about others, always knowing you were the last thought. I get it, Miss Marigold… But I want you to think about this… Master Beau was supposed to be on that business trip for 2 weeks. He came home early because he heard you screaming for him over the phone, he stayed up by his phone when I called him all night because of your screaming, he hopped on the first flight he could back home to get to you, and then he came home and held you until you woke up. He hasn't slept for over 24 hours now. He is exhausted, and yet he still sits by your door, awake, waiting for you to call for him. Master Beau may not do everything right, but know this, he deeply cares for you from the bottom of his heart. He wants you to have everything you've ever wanted. He is always worried about you and tries to make sure you're safe and comfortable. Master Beau loves you, Miss Marigold. He loves you. You may not see it, but I've never seen him treat anyone the way he treats you, the things he does for you, Miss Marigold he loves you. I hope you know and understand that he deeply cares about you, so much and I hope that one day you can at least try to understand who he is and accept his kindness without feeling bitterness towards him." Carls walked over to her door, and he said, "He makes your food to your liking. He made it ever since you first got here. Please, Miss Marigold, try to get to know who Master Beau is, and please don't hold what he did not do against him." Carls left the room, closing the door behind him, while she watched him. 

She looked down at her plate, seeing all of her food, and thought, 'He's been making all of my food? I should hate it, I should hate him but it's all so delicious… I never knew Beau knew how to cook and he did come home early for me… As much as I hate to do this, I should at least thank him for trying to help me. I'll just thank him one time, it couldn't hurt…' She set the tray beside her, walked over to her door, and heard the sounds of snoring.

SHSHSHS, ZZZZZZ, SHSHSHS, ZZZZZ, SHSHSHS, ZZZZZZZ 

She looked up, thinking, 'That could be…" She opened the door, stepping outside her room, and seeing Beau sitting next to her door leaning against the wall, sleeping. Beau continued snoring, "SHSHSHSH, ZZZZZ, SHSHSHSHS, ZZZZZZ, SHSHSHS, ZZZZZ," he scored. She covered her mouth giggling and thinking, 'I've never seen him this tired before. I never knew he was such a loud snorer, either.' She slowly walked over to Beau, crouching down and staring at his face. Beau stopped snoring, and she jumped back thinking, 'I hope he's not up… Please don't be up.' She waited, looking at him, seeing that he was still sleeping. She tilted her head, thinking, 'I've never really taken the time to look at his face before." She studied his face, seeing a few strands of his hair resting on his face. She gently grabbed it, rolling it in her fingers, thinking, 'It's so soft. I never actually got a chance to hold his hair before… I never realized how soft his hair really was. It feels nice." Beau began waking up. Cracking his eyes just enough to see Marigold crouching before him playing in his hair. She touched his face, not realizing he was awake, and she thought to herself, 'No blemishes or scars in sight. It's like he's perfect or something." He placed his hand on her hand (that was touching his face) and opened his eyes staring into her widened crystal blue eyes. He felt her jolt back and said, "You don't have to be scared of me." She pulled her hand away from him, saying, "I'm not scared of you, I just don't want to be around you." They stood up, and she turned away from him, crossing her arms, and he said, "I can tell by the way you jolted back." She faced him, saying, "Just because I got frightened doesn't mean I'm scared of you. You startled me, I thought you were asleep, but you weren't. That's all." She turned away from him, and he said, "Well, that's my bad, I just thought that you were scared of me because you act like it." She faced him once more, saying, "I'm not scared of you, and I don't act like it either. You just boil my blood all the time. You make me angry." He sighed, saying, "Well, I don't mean to make you angry. I try and am trying to make you happy." She said, "Whatever, I don't care. The only reason I came out here was to thank you for coming home early to check on me, and that's it. Other than that, I have nothing else to say to you." A smile came on his face, and she asked, "Why are you smiling?" He chuckled, answering, "Because since you've been here, you've never really thanked me for anything. You're always angry at me, always shouting at me. I'm just happy I could help you, and that makes me smile." She felt her heart pound against her chest as she thought, 'What's happening to me?' She scoffed while rolling her eyes and went back into her room, shutting the door behind her, without saying a word. 

She put her back against the door, leaning on it and thinking, 'What is going on with me? I saw him smile, and it made my heart go wild like some fangirl. It was like I was flooded with butterflies in my stomach. Why, why do I care? Why do I want to see him smile again? The way he looked at me, the way he smiled at me… Why do I want to see it again?" 

She walked over to her closet, turned on the light, and saw a silk sundress hanging up. The silk sundress was floor length and was one shoulder. It was bright white with a square neckline, and throughout the dress was a bright, yellow, sunflower pattern. She walked over to the dress, touching it, while thinking, 'It's so soft… I told Beau I hated it when he first got me it but in reality it's one of the prettiest dresses I've ever seen. I always wanted a beautiful dress like this… I never had the money to afford a dress like this one, but ever since I was a little girl, I've wanted a dress like this.'

She changed into the sundress, left the closet while turning the light to her closet off, walked over to her body mirror, and stood in front of it, staring at her reflection, and thinking, 'It's so pretty, Beau sure knows how to pick beautiful dresses… Maybe I should show him… I mean… He wanted me to wear this dress and it's the least I could do after making him come home early…" She walked over to the door, held the handles, while thinking, 'Why, why do I want to impress Beau? Why do I want to see him smile so badly? Why does his opinion now matter to me? What's happening to me?" She felt her heart race as she opened her door and left her room seeing Beau and Carls standing outside her door talking to one another. She stood in front of them, catching both of their attentions, and she said, "So, how do I look?"