Let Go

You will never be happy unless you let go of the things that make you sad.

***

"Please give me time, Ace. I'm doing everything I can. I promise I'll bear a son in time." I pleaded, swallowing my pride.

Leaving my husband is not something I wanted. I cherish and love him deeply. Ace and I have the power to work through our problems without resorting to divorce.

However, he has a different mindset. While I am grappling with ways to mend our relationship, he has thrown in the towel, and that is what pains me the most.

"Your plea will not work on me," Ace replied. He rose from his chair and cast me a frosty gaze—icy enough to freeze hell itself. "I can't go on like this. I'm tired of this relationship, tired of us."

My jaw dropped to the marble floor.

I stared straight into his beautiful blue eyes, hoping that they would reflect the same pain I felt. However, I was wholly disappointed. His eyes were beautiful but blank, with no emotion in them. They reminded me of a cold hard statue.

Seeing his stoic expression was a crunchy wake-up slap. I realized how pathetic I'd been for begging someone like him to not leave me.

Taking deep breaths, I reign in my emotions. When the chaos inside me subsided, I opened my mouth to speak but he immediately cut me off.

"Whether you like it or not, I will file for divorce." He announced with clenched fists. "You're not gonna stop me. I wasted five years of my life with you and I cannot afford to waste more!"

My saintly self-control finally reached an abrupt end.

Disgust flooded my insides and my hands began to tremble. My gaze pierced through him like a knife and he flinched in response.

I got up from my seat with the regal poise of a queen—ready to announce the beginning of a battle.

"If it's what you want then I'll give you the freedom you ask for. But I hope you won't come to regret this choice someday. Once something is given up, it may come with a price that cannot be reversed."

Without waiting for his response, I ripped off my wedding band from my finger and tossed it on top of the table where it rolled in circles before dropping to where the crimson stain was.

For years, I safeguarded the ring as a symbol of my commitment to care for him as my husband. However, in relinquishing the ring, I'm letting go of that promise. Henceforth, I am no longer his wife.

I looked at him and for once, felt nothing except hate as I wondered how could he tear apart in a minute what I've been trying to fix for years? He's cruel to end everything on our fifth wedding anniversary.

After one final glance at the look of surprise on his face, I marched out of the restaurant, hailed a cab and climbed inside.

I didn't cry when I'm safely inside the dimly lit cab, nor when I spotted the familiar figure of my soon-to-be ex-husband emerging from the upscale restaurant.

I held back my tears as he chased after the fast-receding cab, possessed by a frenzy that led to futile pursuit. Eventually, he was left behind, gasping for breath, as the driver accelerated into the dimly-lit highway.

"To Saint Paul's Hospital please," I mumbled to the middle-aged man stoically seated on the driver's seat.

A weary sigh escaped my lips. I leaned on the backseat and shut my eyes tightly until I saw stars burst behind my eyelids.

It all felt surreal like a dream, but the mental and emotional exhaustion I felt served as proof that this couldn't be a dream after all.

I forced my eyes open and shifted my attention outside the window, blindly staring at the pitch-black, deserted highway, becoming more aware of how dark and empty my life had been.

When the cab screeched against the cemented pavement and pulled into a stop did I become aware that I had reached my destination. I immediately clambered out of the cab and gently closed the door.

The window of the car rolled down and the driver's head peeked from inside. "You forgot to pay." He said politely.

Color spread on my cheeks. I realized that a lot of thoughts had crowded my mind that I had forgotten about it. Without delay, I reached into my wallet, retrieved paper bills, and handed them to him.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled apologetically with a lopsided smile.

The man fumbled for a change and handed it to me. "Please keep it." I told him.

The white exterior of the gigantic hospital greeted my vision when I looked up. My stomach lurched forward at the sight. I hated this place, but I was familiar with it. I spent countless nights here, watching over my mom.

Cold air hit me immediately as I walked along the cold, endless white hallways, causing me to shiver. My hands immediately curled underneath my breasts, providing myself with an inch of warmth.

I stopped at a familiar door, my face losing their color as my trembling fingers reached for the knob. A dozen possibilities invaded my thoughts, each worse than the next.

What if I walked into the room and saw an empty bed? What if she lay there, not breathing? What if I had arrived too late? Countless scenarios raced through my mind, causing me to feel overwhelmed and on the verge of losing my sanity.

Tears raced down my cheeks before I knew it. I didn't cry when Ace asked for divorce, but when confronted with the possible loss of my mom, I lost it.

I hurriedly wiped wetness on my cheeks with the sleeve of my shirt. "Mom?" I called out after I opened the door, but there was no response.

Panic leapt inside me as I stared at the empty hospital bed.

"M-mom? W-here are you? This isn't funny anymore."