Hit me!

Owen's P.O.V.

I was following Jason to the middle of the ground where everyone who partnered up was standing. He was looking back from time to time making sure I was following him. I'm not sure if he wanted to partner up with me because I'm his mate or because he wants to beat me up or he wants to beat me up because I'm his partner. 'Bear it, no matter what, keep it in. Just a month.' I said to myself. It has now become my Mantra. Jason stops when we find a space and I do so too. We stand there in silence, everyone around us was chattering but it felt so quiet. I just looked to the ground but I could feel Jason's eyes fixed on me. More of the reason to not lookup.

"Okay, everyone. Everything is okay as long as you fight with your fist and your goal is to defeat the opponent by fixing him on the ground for five seconds. I'll be watching you so don't try to use any dirty tricks. And try not to send your partner to the hospital." Mr. Brien said the last sentence looking at me and Jason. He meant it for Jason.

Mr. Brien blew the whistle and I turned around to face Jason. I raised my hands as soon as I turned around to cover my face and took a defensive stance. I was expecting a punch on my face as soon as I turned but to my surprise, Jason was just standing there. He was just standing.

"What are you doing?" I asked lowering my hands a little.

"What are you doing? Aren't you gonna fight?" He said raising an eyebrow.

"What?" I said. Seriously, what is he trying to say?

"Hit me." He replied.

"Is this a joke?"

"Hit me. I'm a much better fighter than you are, so it won't be fair if I played aggressively and attacked you. You would not stand a chance. So, you attack and I'll be defending, I can correct your moves." He replied like it was a great plan.

I don't know what he is plotting, but suddenly I'm filled with rage. Maybe it's his word, his all high and mighty façade or maybe it's our history. I don't know what but I'm filled with anger. He was standing there. His hair was as black as the no moon night, his sea-blue eyes, his sharp V-shaped jawline. A 6'2'' figure standing right in front of me. If he attacks I do not stand a chance but I can't think of anything now.

I run to Jason and threw a punch straight to his face. My eyes started to get blurry, I could feel the tears flowing. They were not of sadness; they were because of rage. All the times he hurt me before came flooding back, the memories were so vivid it felt like all that happened just today morning. "I did not deserve that, why did you do that, I did not deserve that." I did not realize but I was screaming. And he was not defending himself, he was planning to let me hit him. I did not realize that either. Vlad was screaming, he did not like me hitting our mate, I could feel him scratching me from inside, but I ignored all that.

But my fist stopped before I could hit him. I always thought that he should be punished for what he did, he should feel the way I did, he should be as hurt like me, he deserved it. But as I was hitting him, I realized that this was not what I really wanted, I did not mean to harm him, all I ever wanted was to not be the victim. All I ever wanted was for him to realize how wrong he was. All I ever wanted was to be normal just like everyone else.

I can't hit him, I have killed him in my thoughts a million times but I can not hit him, I know how much it hurts. I can not put anyone else through what I've been because I know how hard it was. Even if he is the very person who put me in that misery, I cannot do this to him. Because I'm not him, because I know how much a punch hurt, how much a word can hurt and how much the eyes of the people can hurt.

I was standing there with my fist in the air a few inches away from his face. And I got control over my mind. I dropped my hand and stood there breathing heavily. I could feel the anger subside and the tears were stopped. Jason looked surprised. What did not I hit him; he was probably thinking that. But I ignored that and turned around. I was about to walk away when he grabbed my hand and I felt a pleasingly burning sensation there.

"Hit me. Why won't you hit me? I hurt you so much. So, just hit me. Is it because of what we are? I'm not gonna say the word because you don't want to hear it but you know what I'm talking about. Even if we are that, hit me, I'm asking you. Please hit me." he spoke with a shaky voice. I could see tears forming in his eyes when I turned around. I managed to get my hand out of his grasp.

"It has nothing to do with what we are. I did not hit you because I do not want to." I replied.

"Why? If it's not because of that, why wouldn't you hit me." He asked beggingly.

"Because I'm not you. Because I know how much it hurts. Don't get this wrong I've not forgiven you; I'll never forgive you." I replied and started to make my way again.

He grabbed me again and pulled me, I bumped into him. He fell to the ground and I fell on top of him. I started to sit up, and my butt was on his pelvis when I felt his thing getting hard. My entire body started to burn, I felt like I was being roasted. Vlad was in the seventh heaven and my member got rock hard in an instant. This stupid mate bond. 'Get a hold of yourself' I said to myself and started to stand up.

"Pervert," I said as I was sitting up. He looked shocked. I turned in the opposite direction when I stood up. I was blushing so hard, so I hid my face with my palms. 'Calm down. Calm down.' I kept repeating that over and over in my mind as I tried to calm down.

All the other activities were exercises and did not require groups so we performed them separately. Surprisingly Jason left me alone after that incident and I was so grateful for that.

Around 5:30 the training was over and I went home. I jumped in bed as soon as I got home and I started to think about today's incidents. I need to have better control; I cannot mess up things because of the mate bond. I cannot give up when I'm so close to reaching my dreams.