Chapter 6 Bianca

I'm siting in the back and taking deep breaths, trying to keep the panic that keeps bubbling up down. Hating that this is the reaction I have after he wanted to give me his number. I wanted to take it and to be normal, I want to be able to one day find love and be loved. But could I? Could I love them? Would they love me after they find all my scars? I shook my head and started pacing, trying to get my mind off his face. Trying to forget it and get away and run again.

I don't know how long I sit there before I realize that I left Angelica out there by herself. I quickly smooth down my clothes and quickly walk out there. I watch her make a coffee and see that she has three others waiting to be made, I grab the next order and start preparing it. Once it's done, I give it to her to give out to the customer. Not trusting myself not to spill it or to run into Brian. I finish the last one and hand it again to her.

Angelica comes back and stands next to me, not close enough to make me flinch but close enough to hear what she has to say, "He left his number for you, I told him I would give it to you but that if you didn't text him that he should give it more time. I hope I didn't step out of bounds." She gave me a small smile.

I smiled up at her, "Thank you." I say quietly as she hands me the number. I put it in my jean back pocket. I don't think I will text him, but maybe I can put it in my phone just in case. Not that I will call him but you never know these days. I start cleaning the area that we were just working one and start restocking everything for the afternoon shift to come in. Angelica works silently beside me. Maybe I should tell her why I am like I am. Maybe she will still be my friend. My mind has other ideas as it starts throwing the other idea of what if she gives me to my father. I know I am old enough to just get away but my father doesn't want that and he will stop at nothing to get me back. I was his best punching bag he can't have that not be there for him.

I sigh as the end of my shift gets close. I went grocery shopping, finally able to fill the cupboards and the fridge, and even got enough for the freezer. Maybe I can have her come over, and we can do a little bit of a girl's day.

Before I could change my mind, I walk over to Angelica, I gently tap her on her shoulder. "D..D... Do you want to come over and have dinner? I can cook and we can talk. I don't have a t.v or anything, you don't have to of course..." I trail off and try not to make eye contact with her. I don't want to be rejected but I also want to have at least one friend.

Angelica smiles at me, "Of course!" She bounces on her feet as we walk to the back room to grab our stuff. We walk towards her car and she drives the five minutes to my small apartment. It isn't big but it's enough for me. I shake the insecurity out of me and open the door. I walk a little ahead to lead the way. Once we reach the second floor I take my keys out of my pocket and open the door.

I hold my breath, not sure if I should've invited anyone over. But it's too late, she is here and I have opened my door. I walk in and take my shoes off, leaving them by the door and take my jacket to hang out the hooks that I put up. She follows what I did. I turn to her and smile, "This is my little home, I know it isn't much but I like it."

"I love it! it's small but cozy." She says and looks around a little more. I go towards the kitchen and get the rice out and a small pot. My grandmother used to make this amazing chicken and rice. My chicken has been cooking in a crock pot that I got for a fantastic price, so I know that is almost ready. I get the cup measure and start on the rice. "I hope you don't mind chicken and rice. I learned to make it and it's simple but so good. I couldn't resist." I say and look down at my pot and start getting the rice in. I decide to do two cups so that I have leftovers and if she wants to take some home she can.

"That sounds good!" She says and sits down on one of the two stools I have. I send her a smile and put the rice on the stove. I take a breath and turn around.

"Are we friends?" I ask timidly, feeling a little self-conscious from asking her that question. I just wanted to make sure. So that if we aren't I can apologize for bugging her so much.

She smiles at me even though I couldn't see it. "Yes, of course we are!" She says enthusiastically. I look up at her stunned. I didn't expect it and she goes on, "We were friends from the moment I met you." She says. I smile at her.

"I just wanted to make sure I wasn't bothering you, that's all." She laughs a little and I smile. Happy that I have one friend here. I don't want to tell her everything but maybe we can get to that point. Once the rice was done, we dished it out and sat there talking about each. The game of 20 questions was so much fun. I've never played but I like it. Maybe I can play with Brian and see how that goes.

By the time we look at the time it is 10 o'clock. We say goodbye and she leaves. I tell her to text me when she gets home. I didn't think I could have had a better night. I smile to myself as I hop into bed after doing my nightly routine.

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