67. Tricked! (Part 2)

Tricked! (Part 2)

One halloween night with the Loud family has turned disasterous. Thanks to those two bullies, Franklin Avenue has been left a mess. Not to mention everyone's candy was stolen! It seemed like halloween was completely ruined.

[The girls are closing up the maze]

Lincoln: Guys, what's going on? Why are the streets deserted, and why are you taking down your maze?

Lucy: Nobody showed up. All my work for nothing. Not a single scream. Sigh.

Clyde: Nobody showed up? Why not?

Lola: Because two big stinkers came along and ruined everything!

Lana: Yeah! They TP'd all the trees and smashed all the Jack-O-Lanterns.

Lola: And worst of all, they stole everybody's candy!

Lisa: And with the amount of candy I had, we're talking grand larceny.

Lincoln: Where's Laney? [Lisa points to Laney and Joey tied up to the tree with toilet paper. Lincoln and Clyde gasp and huddled up]

Clyde: Two big stinkers? You don't think it was the guys we told to come here, do you?

Lincoln: No way, Clyde. There's plenty of big stinkers in our neighborhood.

Clyde: True.

Lana: [anguished] I'll never shake the sound of their big dumb laughs.

Clyde: Wait. Didn't those guys have big dumb laughs?

Lincoln: Clyde, plenty of people have big dumb laughs.

Clyde: True.

Lola: [vengeful] And I'll never forget those creepy baby-faced masks!

Clyde: Wait. Didn't those guys-

Lincoln: Okay, Clyde, it was them.

Lisa: Ugh. All Hallow's Eve, street name Halloween, is clearly ruined.

[The other sisters go back inside greatly upset of what happened. Lily crawls by sighing with despair. Laney frees her and Joey]

Laney: Wait! Come back! We can still make this work! Sure we don't have any candy and can't clean up the pumpkins but.. uh... [Joey puts his hand on her shoulder]

Joey: I'm sorry this happened to you, Laney. But, look on the bright side. At least we had fun tonight.

Laney: [sniffles] Yeah. Up to the point that we got robbed of our sweet... choclatey.. candy! [sobs, Joey continues to console her]

Lincoln: [riddled with guilt] This is all our fault, Clyde! We led those stinkers right to my street!

Lincoln and Clyde: We ruined Halloween!

Clyde: Why didn't Dr. Lopez tell me the pitfalls of looking out for me?

Lincoln: We gotta fix this, Clyde.

Clyde: I'm with you. But how?

Lincoln: Well, we can't unsmash the Jack-O-Lanterns, and it's too late to get people to come to the maze. But we can get everybody's candy back.

Clyde: [scared] From those two big scary guys who could twist us into human pretzels and dip us in a sauce of their choosing?

Lincoln: What choice do we have?

Clyde: I guess you're right. I hope at least it's honey mustard. [Lincoln walks up to Laney]

Lincoln: Come on, Laney. We're gonna save Halloween.

Laney: We are? How?

Lincoln: We're gonna get everyone's candy back.

Laney: [stands up] I'm in! Later, Joey! [Laney runs off with the boys]

[The boys, now out of their costumes, are walking the streets]

Lincoln: Laney. You can take off the costume now.

Laney: Yes I do. It's still Halloween you know! I'm just trying to keep in the spirit.

Lincoln: Okay. First, we gotta find those guys. But it won't be easy. We don't even know where to start looking.

Clyde: [notices something] How about that trail of candy wrappers?

[The boys follow the trail until a gust of wind blows the wrappers away]

Lincoln: No, our trail!

Clyde: [shaking Lincoln vigorously] What are we gonna do now?

[Some familiar laughter goes off]

Lincoln and Clyde: [gasp] The big dumb laughs!

[Hank and Hawk are eating candy and dragging their sacks down the path while tossing wrappers on the ground]

Hank: Pretty awesome booty, bro.

Hawk: Thanks, bro. I've been doing squats.

Hank: Not you, the candy.

Hawk: Oh. Right.

[Lincoln, Clyde, and Laney follow them to their hideout which is a treehouse]

Clyde: I don't know which is worse: the stealing or the littering?

Lincoln: We need a plan. [comes up with one] I know! We train some squirrels to go in and attack them. While they're busy getting rabies, we grab the candy.

Clyde: I like the wildlife approach, but I was thinking we get a beaver to chew down the tree.

Lincoln: Or we hypnotize those guys so they fall asleep.

Clyde: Or, building off of that, I put them to sleep by playing the lullabies my dads put on my phone. [takes out phone] Of course, I'd have to put in earplugs so I don't fall asleep.

Laney: Enough! I don't need a plan! I NEED CANDY! [Laney runs towards the treehouse, climbs up and runs out with the bags of candy] Yow! Did you see that! I gave those rotten bullies the slip! That oughta teach them to steal candy that's not theres. [Lincoln and Clyde suddenly get scared]

Lincoln: Uh.. Laney?

Laney: I know, you're surprised to see little Laney do something reckless like that. But no one gets in the way of my favorite holiday.

Clyde: Laney?

Laney: No need for thank yous. [Zoom out to reveal Hank and Hawk behind Laney] Even though I completely saved Halloween from those big, brainless, smelly, pack of apes! [Leans on Hank] You guys know what I'm talking about ri- [Laney is shocked to finally find out the bullies followed her. They close in on the three ready to pummel them] Uh... [Pulls out a piece of chocolate from the bag] Wanna split a kitty kat?

[The scene cuts to a pretzel to leave out the pummeling happening off-screen and changes to Lincoln, Clyde, and Laney now as human pretzels in a dumpster, groaning in pain]

Clyde: I guess the dipping sauce of their choosing was garbage.

Hawk: All this butt kicking has worked up my appetite. Let's go finish off the candy.

Hank: We'll see you doofuses next Halloween. And tell your neighbors no more dark chocolate. We're milk chocolate guys.

[They laugh and leave]

Lincoln: Guys, we can't let these guys ruin everybody's future Halloweens.

Laney: And we won't! [Laney gets out of the dumpster] All year round I've been waiting for the one day where I get to put on a costume and get candy! And that's why Halloween is my favorite holiday, it's why it's everyone's favorite holiday. And I speak for every candy-crazed kid in America when I say I won't let those two meatheads ruin this day for me!

Clyde: Great speech, Laney. But what are we gonna do? Next time, they might twist us into garlic knots. Or French crullers.

Lincoln: Clyde, you're spiraling.

Clyde: I know. I'd better do my deep breathing before I get a nosebleed. [pauses] Inhale one... [inhales] ...exhale two. [exhales]

Lincoln: [inspired] Wait a minute. Nosebleed. Clyde, do you remember the first time we ran into them?

Laney: You've met them?

Lincoln: Yeah, and they turn nauseous at the sight of blood. And I know where there's plenty of it.

Clyde: [picks up a dirty soda cup and holds it below his nostrils] Okay, I'll start thinking of Lori.

Lincoln: No no, Clyde. Not you. [takes out his phone and calls Lucy on her personal phone]

Lucy: [answers] You rang?

Lincoln: Lucy, how would you like to have your haunted maze after all?

[Lucy emerges from her coffin and gives off a slight smile]

[Near the stinkers' treehouse, Lincoln and Clyde are in their Alister and Nigel disguises again with bags full of leaves while Clyde is shaking in terror]

Lincoln: You okay, buddy?

Clyde: To be honest, I'm scared out of my mind. But as a great man once said, "We shall not flag or fail. We shall go on to the end".

[Lincoln just stares blankly with no idea who he meant]

Clyde: Winston Churchill. It was in the study guide.

Lincoln: Sorry. If we survive this, I'll read the rest of it.

[They get their sacks ready]

Lincoln: [sighs] Well, here we go.

[They get into character and proceed]

Clyde: [British accent] I say, Alister, old chap, we certainly had a smashing success with the sweets tonight.

Lincoln: [British accent] Indeed. And what a selection. All milk chocolate.

[Hearing that catches Hank and Hawk's attention]

Hawk: Bro, did you hear that? More candy!

Hank: Aw, there's no way I can eat more candy.

[They start laughing]

Hawk: Good one.

Hank: Aw, I know.

[They see the boys]

Hawk: Let's get 'em!

[They leap out of the treehouse and give chase to Clincoln McCloud. The boys climb over a log, but the stinkers plow right through it. The boys hop over stones on a lake, but the stinkers charge on top of the water. The boys cross another log acting as a bridge, and when the stinkers try, their combined weight breaks the bridge, making them fall, scream, and climb up with their bare hands. Soon, they arrive back into town]

Hawk: [stops in pain] Ugh, stomach cramps!

Hank: Aw, man! If you get a cramp, I'll get a cramp.

Clyde: [looking back] I think we're losing them! [realizes] Oh, wait. We don't wanna lose them!

Lincoln: Let's just job in place.

[They do so]

Hawk: I'm okay!

Lincoln: Go!

[The chase resumes all the way to the corn maze with the stinkers getting ready to pummel the boys again as they rush in]

Hank: They're ours now.

[Lincoln and Clyde duck into a few corn plants and lose them]

Clyde: It worked! We got them in here.

Lincoln: As Winston Churchill once said, "Never, never, never give up". [Clyde looks at him all ecstatically] I felt bad, so while we were jogging in place, I glanced at the study guide.

[The stinkers are still looking]

Hawk: [a little scared] It's really dark in here.

Hank: Man up, bro! I want that candy. [Laney was in the corn maze watching the stinkers]

Laney: Alright, stinkers. Let's see what scares you... [the light turn off]

Hank: What's that?

[Luna is playing on her organ; song begins]

When darkness falls on the house of Loud

Around every corner, new terror abounds

You don't want to lose your head! Ha ha ha!

You can run, but you can't hide

They know that you taste better alive

I don't think that they've been fed

In a long, long time

Every corner, every floor

Watch out, they ain't heard before

Ghastly ghouls out for blood

Sorry, boys

You got tricked

You got tricked

You got punked and pranked with a spooky twist

Before you wet your pants, better get out quick

Tricked, tricked, tricked

You got...tricked

Beware of fangs and bloody fur

A Loud House chainsaw massacre

There's no chance that you'll get out

Ghosts writing your eulogy

Heads are rolling literally

So, who needs their mommy now?

Spilling guts on the floor

Clean up on aisle four

Why you running off so soon?

Sorry dude

You got tricked

You got tricked

You got punked and pranked with a spooky twist

Before you wet your pants, better get out quick

Tricked, tricked, tricked

You got...tricked

[During the montage, the Loud Sisters scare the stinkers with everything they throw at them. Luan brings Mr. Coconuts to life, Lisa and Lily act rabid, Lori acts like she's been feasting on Rita, Lynn turns on her chainsaw Lola appears like a corpse, Lana acts as her ghost, Leni walks around blindly under her dress with Geo rolling in his ball with the fake head still on, Laney was stirring a monster filled pot and cackled like a real witch, and everything else in the maze terrifies them to the point where the sounds of their screams catches the attention of the other kids on the block, and they run into Lucy who is blocking the exit]

Lucy: The crimes you have committed this night shan't go unpunished. You reap what you sow.

[She slashes a rope with her scythe, dumping a bucket of fake blood on them, making them scream]

Hank: Blood!

Hawk: I'm gonna puke!

Hank: If you're gonna puke, I'm gonna puke!

[As they run out screaming, Lucy gives a small smile of satisfaction]

Hank: [nauseous] We're not...coming back here...again...

[He and Hawk run off]

Luna: [finishing her song] You got...tricked.

[Everyone cheers for a successful maze scare]

Lana: That was awesome!

Leni: That was so awesome!

Lincoln: Thanks, guys. I think we taught those two big stinkers a lesson.

Lucy: No, thank you for bringing them here. You totally made my Halloween. I've never been happier.

[Once again, little to no change of emotion on her; Clyde examines it]

Lincoln: Trust me, she's happy. Hopefully, next year, your maze will have more than two customers.

Rita: [notices something] Looks like we won't have to wait till next year.

[Every kid in the neighborhood showed up]

Lucy: [on megaphone] Places, everyone.

[The girls go back in the maze. Joey runs in with the other kids]

Joey: Laney!

Laney: Joey!

Joey: I saw everything! Whatever's in that maze really scared those blokes straight!

Laney: Yep! And you can thank these guys for making all this back from the dead.

Lincoln: Thanks, Laney. I'm sorry no one's gonna get any candy.

Clyde: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Lincoln: Let's go get our shovels!

[Lincoln and Clyde are giving out the full-size bars they got to the kids who had their candy stolen]

Ballerina girl: Trick or treat!

[Lincoln gives her one]

Clyde: Here you go.

Harry Potter boy: Trick or treat!

Lincoln: [gives him one] And here you go.

Robot kid: [in a faux metallic voice] TRICK OR TREAT.

[Lincoln gives him one and the younger sisters are next]

Laney, Lola, Lana and Lisa: Trick or treat!

[Lincoln gives each of them one]

Lola: Ooh!

Lana: Full-size candy bars? No way!

Lisa: Wow. Where did you acquire these magnificent specimens?

Lincoln: It's a long story. Let's just say next Halloween, we have a great place to take you guys trick-or-treating.

Clyde: You'll just need a British accent.

Laney: [bites into her choclate bar] Mmmm! So good!

[The sisters run off and a boy as a mummy comes up next]

Mummy boy: Trick or treat!

[Lincoln gives him one. Lola and Lana come back in their salt and pepper shaker costumes]

Lola and Lana: Trick or treat!

Lincoln: [too smart for the trick] Nice try.

[The twins walk away foiled. A girl dressed as a hot dog is the last one]

Hot dog girl: Trick or treat!

[Lincoln gives her one]

Clyde: That's everybody.

Lincoln: Great. And the rest of the candy bars are all ours.

Clyde: Well... [reaches in and pulls out a single fun size bar] ...there's actually just this one.

Lincoln: Eh, that's all right. Giving them out was just as fun as getting them. Splitsies?

Clyde: Sure.

[They split the bar and take their halves]

Clyde: Thanks, Jack-O-Lincoln. Happy Halloween.

Lincoln: Happy Halloween, McBride of Frankenstein.

[Lynn Sr. finally comes to and wakes up]

Lynn Sr.: [relieved] Oh, thank goodness it's over. [hears a thump and screams] What was that? [sees the Marie head, still rolled by Geo underneath, hitting the wagon and screams one last time] I HATE HALLOWEEN!