66. Tricked! (Part 1)

Tricked! (Part 1)

[Daytime. The Loud House is covered in Halloween decorations as the entrance of a corn sits next to it. Offscreen, a fridge door opens, and a scream is heard, as bats fly out of the house and towards the screen, darkening the picture. Zoom out to a close up of Lynn Sr. screaming in horror after seeing a fake severed head with fake blood in the fridge]

Lynn Sr.: I HATE HALLOWEEN!

[He exits right. A moment later, Lucy enters, walking towards the fridge and picking up the head.]

Lucy: [smiles] I love Halloween.

Head: Bleh.

[She exits]

[Dining Room. In counter-clockwise order, we see Luan fashioning a sign reading "HAUNTED CORN MAZE" in red-stained corn cobs, Leni hanging black curtains, Luna, Lincoln, Lana, Lola, and Lynn Jr. carving pumpkins, Lisa making fake blood in a bucket, Lily playing with pumpkin innards and Charles resting against a corn cob. We pan left as Lucy enters.]

Lucy: Excellent fake blood, Lisa. Add some molasses for better consistency.

Lynn: Hey, Luce! Check out our pumpkins! Whaddya think?

[Each turns their jack-o-lanterns around, showing each gruesome carved face.]

Lucy: Hmm... [points to a spot on Lynn's pumpkin] More blood here, [motions around Lola's pumpkin] few more gashes on this one, [flicks out a tooth on Lana's pumpkin] knock out a tooth, [points to the scabs on Lincoln's pumpkin] add some more mousse to those scabs, [pats Luna's pumpkin] dampen the head wounds. [Looks at Laney's pumpkin, which has sewed eyes and mouth and has cuts all over it] Hmm.

Laney: Sorry, Lucy. I'm not very good at making Jack-o-lanterns.

Lucy: I don't know, Laney. Add some blood on the mouth and eyes and I think we got something.

Luna: Halloween's kinda crazy with a spooky little girl like you!

Leni: Totes! I'm so glad Mom finally let you do your haunted corn maze!

Lucy: As am I. I've been waiting my whole life to do this. Not to mention my past lives [She walks off screen to Luan, who has just finished her sign] Fantastic sign work, Luan. Just the right mixture of corn and gore.

Luan: Ah, shucks! It's just something I cob-bled up together from a kernel of an idea! [dances a little, laughing] Oh Yes! A triple!

[Lucy and the others groan as a jack-o-lantern is thrown onto Luan's head]

Luan: [through pumpkin] I'd expect more support from my "pump-kin!" [laughs as the jack-o-lantern's grin grew wider] Get it?

Lucy: [facepalms] Sigh... [turns to the others, as the screen zooms out to show Lincoln] Thanks for all your hard work, guys. This is gonna be the best Halloween ever. I'm so excited.

[her face shows a little change in the emotion]

Lincoln: [to the audience] Trust me. [points to Lucy] She's excited.

Laney: I know how you feel Lucy. I just love halloween too.

Lucy: Really? Do you like the part where all the monsters come out of the darkness and scare people?

Laney: That's cool. But I'm more into going out in costume and getting lots of sweet, choclatey, toothache enducing candy... [drools, Lucy snaps her fingers at her and she snaps out of it] Well, good luck with the maze Lucy. I'm to get ready for tonight. [leaves]

[A thump is heard off screen]

Lynn Sr.: [offscreen] AAAAAH! I hate Halloween!

Lucy: Oh. [everyone looks at her] Dad must have found the severed limbs I stored in his closet.

[Time skip to later in Laney's room. Laney was in picking out a costume while Cliff was resting on Laney's bed]

Laney: [off screen] Okay, Cliff. I want your honest opinion. Which one of my costumes would be perfect? [Laney comes out in a fairy princess costume. Cliff shakes his head] Your right, too frilly. [Laney goes back inside the closet and comes back out in a mummy costume. Cliff shakes his head again] Your right, such a waste of toilet paper. [Laney goes back in; off-screen] Okay, how about this? [Laney comes out in a witch's costume holding a broom, Cliff comes up to her and purrs] I knew you'd like it.

Lisa: [off-screen] Siblings, assemble! It's almost time for the annual ritual of deception versus confection; street name, trick or treating!

Laney: Oh boy! [leaves her room and sees Lisa in a kangaroo costume] Wow, Lisa. You look cute in that kangaroo costume.

Lisa: That's the idea, dear sister.

[Enter the twins in their costumes. Lana is Abraham Lincoln and Lola is the Statue of Liberty]

Lana: Four score and seven pieces of candy ago.

Lola: Give me your tired, your poor, your delicious treats yearning to be in my tummy!

Laney: Wait a minute. I thought you two were going as salt and pepper shakers.

Lola: We are! [tears off her Lady Liberty costume while Lana tears off her Honest Abe one, both revealing new costumes] We're also a mermaid and a pirate.

Laney: Isn't it easier to wear just one costume.

Lola: Yes. But you see, by wearing three costumes we can hit each house three times.

Lana: That means three times the candy.

Lisa: Yes. I am familiar with basic multiplication. Your strategy is cute, but mine is far superior.

Lana: Going as a kangaroo. [scoffs] I doubt it.

Lisa: Kangaroo plus baby roo. [reveals Lily who is dressed as her joey and cooing]

[The twins and Laney gasp over the amazingly adorable sight]

Lisa: Precisely. That aw factor will increase my candy revenue exponentially. And the best part is, she only has one tooth, so I don't have to share.

Laney: Clever girl.

Lola: [breaks out of the cuteness trance] Snap out of it, guys. [breaks her twin's trance and goes up to Lincoln's door and knocks] Lincoln! Clyde! Get your butts out here!

[The boys open the door and reveal to be dressed as British masters]

Lola: I thought you guys were going as Ace Savvy and One-Eyed Jack.

Lincoln: Uh, we are. We're Ace and Jack undercover, trying to crack the cause of the missing crumpets.

Lisa: Boy, you guys really don't want candy, do you?

Lincoln: Yeah, you're right. We probably won't get much this year.

[The two snicker slyly]

Laney: Is it me, or are those boys up to something?

Lola: Eh. It's probably nothing.

Lana: Alright, let's get some candy. Has anyone seen Dad?

[They hear someone whimpering off in the distance. Lola groans and barges into the bathroom]

Lynn Sr.: [whimpering] Everything's scary. I don't know why everything's scary.

[Lola opens the shower curtain and finds him in the bathtub]

Lisa: Let's go, Father! Chop chop! These candy bags won't fill themselves. Though, I am working on a prototype which will do exactly that.

Lynn Sr.: [nervous] Uh, sorry, kids. I can't go. I think I have the flu. Or the plague. Or a Charley Horse.

Lola: [exasperated] Ugh. We go through this every year!

Laney: Alright, grab a limb.

[The twins and Laney grab their dad as Lisa hops off]

Lynn Sr.: [screams reluctantly] I don't wanna! I don't wanna! [gets dragged off]

Clyde: [to Lincoln] Your Dad's doing better this year.

[They follow. Outside, the kids start chanting candy while Lynn Sr. is terrified of going out. Lincoln and Clyde fist bump and prepare to break away from the group]

Lola: [suspicious] Hey, where are you two going?

Lincoln: Nowhere. We, uh, just decided to go through the neighborhood counterclockwise this year.

[He and Clyde nervously grin]

Lisa: Seems like an odd, pointless choice. Much like your costumes.

Laney: I'm telling you, those two are up to something.

Lynn Sr.: Have fun, boys. [sees something on his shirt and freaks out] AH! Spider web!

Lola: It's a loose thread on your shirt. [plucks it off]

Lynn Sr.: Well, I guess I can't trick-or-treat if my shirt's falling apart, right?

Lola: [not buying it] Nice try. [grabs and drags him as he yelps]

Laney: Want me to hold your hand, dad?

Lynn Sr.: Yes please! [Laney holds his hand]

So later that night, Laney and her youngest sisters, accompanied by their petrified dad, began their trick or treating route. With Laney being the most excited about it, especially the part where people give out candy.

Laney: Wow! Look at all the people in costumes. There's a psycho killer, and a frankenstein, oh and a werewolf!

Lola: You know Laney, I'm surprised your not as scared of Halloween as dad.

Laney: That's because they're not real monsters, just people in costumes. Believe me, nothing scares me. [enter Joey in a Dr Jerkyl/Mr Hyde costume]

Joey: Hey, Laney.

Laney: AAH! [Hides behind Lynn Sr.]

Lana: Almost nothing.

Joey: Relax, Laney. It's just a costume.

Laney: [Nervous] Uh, yeah I know that... heh.. So, uh, what are you doing here?

Joey: Same as you, trick or treating. [Looks at the twins costumes] And ywhat adorable costumes you have.

Lola and Lana: Thank you.

Laney: Care to join us? We're about to hit the next house.

Joey: Sure! I could always go for more candy in my bag.

Lola: Hah! I doubt you could get more candy than us!

Joey: What do you mean?

Lana: We have a system.

Lola: Watch and learn. [The twins go up to the first house with their patriotic costumes and knock as the door opens]

Lola and Lana: Trick or treat!

Diem Doan: Oh, aren't you two adorable. [gives them their candy]

[As the door closes, there's another knock with the twins now in their aquatic outfits]

Lola and Lana: Trick or treat!

Diem Doan: [easily fooled] So cute! [gives them more candy]

[Another knock and the twins are in their condiment costumes]

Lola and Lana: Trick or treat!

Diem Doan: [still believing] Great costumes. [gives them more candy]

Lola and Lana: Thank you! [leave]

Lana: And that is how it's done. One house, six pieces of candy.

Joey: Impressive.

Laney: You should see how Lisa does it.

Joey: Does she wear three costumes at once too?

[Lisa hops up to the door and knocks as it opens]

Lisa: Trick or treat!

Diem Doan: How sweet. A kangaroo. [prepares to give her her candy]

Lisa: And a baby roo.

[Lily pops out of Lisa's pouch and coos]

Diem Doan: [overcome by the adorableness] Aww! [gives Lisa every piece in her bowl]

Lisa: [hops away] Thank you! [contently to the twins] Ha. One house, eighty-seven pieces of candy.

Joey: Wow, Laney. You're sisters are very clever.

Laney: Thanks. But if you ask me, I like doing it the old fashioned way. [Walks up to the door and knock on it. Diem Doan opens it]

Laney: Trick or treat.

Diem Doan: I love your little witch costume. But I'm afraid I'm all out of candy. That cute little kangaroo got every last one. [closes the door]

Laney: [walks back downtrodden] Aw.

Lola: No worries Laney. The night is still young. There are plenty more houses to go.

[The wind blows eerily behind Lynn Sr.]

Lynn Sr.: [screams] A ghost just touched me! [faints]

Lola: [shaking his face] Daddy, wake up!

Lisa: [pulls in a wagon] Never fear, siblings. I have prepared for this eventuality.

[They drag Lynn Sr. on the wagon for the rest of the hunt]

Joey: Is your dad always like this?

Laney: Yeah..

So throughout the night, the kids were going door to door getting candy. But by the time they got back home, it was more trick than treat for them...

[Time-skip to a few hours later. The kids walked home holding huge sacks of candy. Laney was sucking on a lolipop]

Lana: Man! What a haul!

Lisa: Acording to my calculations, we have a total of 1,243 pieces of candy. That should be enough to last till Christmas.

Laney: I still can't belive Lincoln couldn't join us. He's totally missing out on all this sweet deal. [laughs] Get it? Sweet? [Lisa and the twins groan while Joey giggles]

Joey: It sure was fun hanging out with you tonight, Laney. The way your family celebrates Halloween is facinating.

Laney: If you think that's cool. You should check out this haunted corn maze we got at our house. Lucy made to be so scary that- WHA!?

[They all stop to see two bullies named Hank and Hawk wearing creepy doll masks covering Laney's house in toilet paper and smashing their jack o lanterns]

Hank: Man, that loud kid was right! Look at all the candy got from all those kids!

Hawk: Yeah! And this neighborhood is perfect to tp on! Best halloween ever! [The bullies high five each other and laugh]

Lola: [off-screen] What do you big bullies think your doing? [The bullies look at the kids who have huge bags of candy]

Hawk: Hey kid! Give us your candy!

Laney: [steps forward] No way! I'm not giving up this haul for you dumb apes! [This angered the bullies]

Hank: Who are you calling apes, witch?! [The bullies approach Laney then Joey steps forward]

Joey: You want Laney? You have to go through me!

[Hank and Hawk look at each other, then they go for Laney and Joey and the screen cuts to black. Meanwhile, Lincoln and Clyde are walking down the street with their sacks loaded]

Lincoln: What a haul! Maybe we should take it to your house, because my sisters will pounce on it.

Clyde: Well, if we take it to my house, my dads will lock it up and only let me have three ounces a week.

Lincoln: Hmm. We need a Plan C.

[They bury it underground. Bat transition to the intersection of Franklin and Olive as they arrive]

Lincoln: Our hard work paid off, Clyde. Best Halloween ever.

[They high five and turn the corner and find, to their shock, that the jack-o-lanterns are smashed, toilet paper is in the trees, candy wrappers are all over the ground, and all of Franklin Avenue is a complete mess]

Lincoln: [shocked] Well...maybe not for everyone.

[End of Part 1]