Ch 957 - Something Is Off

While Debbie and Mark were being given the interview from hell, Alex was back at home, spending some quality time with his mother. The smell of brownies baking filled the kitchen as they prepared a custard for the ice cream maker. Flora held the ice cream maker open while Alex poured in the ice cream mix. 

Alex had called his parents to ask for advice about his situation with Debbie; when he realized that they wouldn't be much help, he had ended the called and continued about his day. Gideon and Flora had responded by hopping on the first first-class flight they could find, and coming to Baltimore to stay with Alex. They knew all about the breakup by now, and it became clear that they needed a little family time to reconnect.

Alex enjoyed cooking, but he preferred hiring someone who could make world-class dishes. His own efforts tasted bland by comparison.

"Is that enough?" he asked, pulling the bowl away. The pink base of what would become strawberry ice cream filled about half the drum. 

"Pour in the rest," Flora said. "The more, the merrier!"

Alex poured in the rest of the ice cream mix. "It's not the end volume I'm concerned about," he said, grabbing a spatula and scraping the sides of the bowl. "This machine can only handle so much. I don't want to break it."

"Just buy another one," Flora said, closing the lid. She pressed the "on" button and the machine began to cool down and churn the ice cream. In forty–five minutes, they would have some delicious, homemade strawberry soft-serve which Alex was looking forward to. 

Gideon had gone out in the early hours, determined to catch some fish. Alex had woken up to a text message reading, "Gone to bag some trout. Back before dinner!"

That gave Alex some time to spend with his mother, and he was glad for it. They spent the morning baking. Alex hadn't felt so relaxed in a long time. For a few hours, he forgot about the breakup, Riley, and his nonsense, and even Lincoln. It was nice to have the only thing he worried about was the amount of flour he was using in the brownies, and the consistency of custard for the ice cream.

It didn't stop the gnawing feeling in his stomach that Justin should be there. Despite everything that had happened, Justin was still a part of the family. Alex had sent him text messages and left a couple of voicemails, but had gotten nothing in response. After Alex sent the last message, asking Justin if he was joining them for dinner, Flora told him to leave it alone. 

"Leave it alone, Alex," she said, when she caught him looking at his phone. "He's been unresponsive for a while now. Even in Venice, he would rather grunt or huff when we asked him anything. Justin will respond when he's ready."

Alex tucked his phone away and sat at the dining table with a cup of coffee. His mother had some tea. Alex caught her up on everything that had been going on, although she still refused to believe that the super soldiers had ever been a thing. However, she did believe Alex when he told her that the living room was destroyed, and that's why Ken Stokes had renovated it. 

"The design is poor," she said, sipping her tea. "We need to get a professional, an expert, in here to restore it to its former glory. I'll ask some of the girls in my book club and see if they have any recommendations."

"I like the house," Alex protested. "It's kind of grown on me."

"You're looking at it for several hours every day," she said, "of course it grew on you, you just got used to it. I'll call the girls, and we can renovate this place in no time."

Alex let the topic drop. As his mother caught him up on all the drama surrounding the women in her book club, he found himself thinking about Justin. Justin had always been prone to acting out. If Alex was interested in a woman, Justin would be there as competition. If Alex was about to start a business, Justin would get arrested. If their parents flew back to Baltimore to check on Alex, well, Justin would follow right behind them. 

"I'm really worried about Justin," he said, cutting across her. Flora looked surprised at the interruption, but she let him continue. "I know, he'll come to us when he's ready, but what if he's never ready? He clearly feels like you prioritize me over him, and there's always been something just off about the way he is. I can't explain it, but it's like he's not my brother sometimes."

"Alex, honey," she said, placing a reassuring hand on his arm, "that's just the way Justin is. We can't force him to change his lifestyle just because he's worried. He has to come to that conclusion on his own."

Alex pulled his hand away and said, "But I'm telling you. Something is off. Like, really off. I can't describe it-"

"Then don't!" Flora said with a surprisingly stern tone. "Some things are better left unexplored."

"What does that mean?" he asked.

Flora didn't answer. She stood up, grabbing her tea and going over to check on the ice cream maker. Alex followed her. 

"Mom," he demanded, "what do you mean?" 

"Leave it alone, Alex," she said, turning on him. "This is one can of worms I will not open!"

"Too late," he said, making a wide gesture with his hands. "The can's already open, may as well dump the worms out!"

Flora's face turned a fierce shade of purple, and her mouth moved as if she was trying to speak, but couldn't get the words out. After a few minutes, her face regained its normal color and she took a deep inhale. 

"What I'm about to tell you," she said in a shaky voice, "doesn't leave this kitchen. It stayed between us. Do I have your word?"

Alex blinked. What could possibly be so serious that it had to be sworn to secrecy?"

"Do I have your word, Alexander Ambrose?" she asked, more firmly this time. 

"Yes!" He snapped. "You have my word!"

She came in close and spoke in a tone above a whisper. 

The world crashed down around Alex. His hands began to shake, and he had to stop himself from screaming. 

"No," he said, his voice shaking. "That's not true." He let out a nervous laugh. "You're joking right?"

She looked up at him, stunned. "Alex," she said. "It's true."

Alex's blood went cold as he tried to understand what his mother had just said. He looked down at his mother, who had been there for him in all his times of need. Suddenly, he was met with a rush of childhood memories from the time when his father was traveling all over the world, barely stopping at home for more than a few nights. 

"This is why I didn't want to say anything!" she said, clapping her hands over her face. Her voice came out at a much higher pitch than normal. "This stupid can of worms! I wanted to take this to my grave! But you made me, you forced my hand!"

"I didn't force you!" he shouted. "You've been carrying this around for years. It's your guilty conscience that forced you!"

"Was it guilt?" she demanded "Or was it love for my family? If word had gotten out, it would have destroyed us. We would be destitute right now. We'd have none of this," she gestured to the kitchen, "and we wouldn't have each other. You would have grown up hating me."

"What makes you think we wouldn't have each other?" he asked. His stomach was beginning to hurt. 

"Think for one minute, Alex," she said, balling her hands into fists and resting them on her hips. "What happens when something like this gets out?"

Alex thought, though his mind was racing. Married couples often divorced when there was infidelity. Alex didn't think that Gideon would have ever filed for divorce. If anything, he would have tried to make it work. Or, he might have shrugged it off. Alex didn't want to think about it, but his mind raced with all the possibilities. 

"Does Dad know?" Alex asked.

Flora's face fell and her shouldersdeflated. She shook her head.

"Of course he doesn't know," Alex muttered, turning away from his mother. "Why would he have any right to know?"

"It would have destroyed us!" Flora repeated, coming up behind him. "Not just our reputation, but our family."

"Dad would never have left!" Alex snapped, turning on his heel to face his mother. He was taller than she was, so he towered over her. "He would have stayed, for all you know, he would have quit his job just to make you happy. God knows, we didn't need the money he got from working! He worked because he love his job."

"He loved his job more than us, sometimes," Flora replied, taking a step back. Her eyes were glistening with tears. "Do you have any idea how hard it was, being alone for long stretches of time?"

Alex gaped at her. "You had me! You are my mother," he said. "Wasn't it enough to take care of your child while your husband was gone?"

Flora stiffened, then blinked and stood up straight. "You were an easy child," she said in a voice that was far too calm. "You didn't pose any challenges. All I had to do was give you a toy, and you were happy. That being said, raising a child is no substitute for adult conversation. I needed to be outside, in the real world, talking with people my own age!"

"Then why didn't you hire a babysitter?" Alex challenged, pointing a finger at her. "You could have had friends over! You could have given me to an aunt or uncle. Why didn't you? That's what normal parents do!"

"I don't know!" Flora said. "If I could take it all back, I would, but then we might not have Justin-" Her eyes went wide as she stopped herself.

Alex was about to challenge her, to demand what she was going to say next, but he stopped himself short of asking.

Do I really want to know? He thought.

"I don't think I can comprehend this," he muttered, stumbling away from his mother. 

Alex slumped into a chair and buried his face in his hands. He groaned miserably, trying to stop his mind from whirring. In the background, the ice cream maker dinged, and he could smell smoke. 

Flora said something, but Alex's ears were ringing, and he could barely hear anything. He was vaguely aware of her fussing over the ice cream as she removed the drum and put it in the freezer, but he had gone numb. 

His mother went on, acting like everything was normal. She had put it all out of her mind, and was continuing with their mother-son baking activities by taking the brownies out of the oven. The smell of burned sugar filled the kitchen as she waved away the smoke from the oven. She was saying something about needing to make a new batch. Alex nodded, his mind going blank.

The words still rang in his ears: "Gideon might not be Justin's father."