Akihiko's crazy monologue

"I really like you, Akihiko!" Sakura confessed as she waited for Akihiko's answer. She looked at Akihiko's face with hope as Akihiko sighed.

"Sakura, you know I already have wives and lovers, right? I even have kids. How shameless do I have to be, to have more lovers?"

Sakura just bit her lip as her head drooped down.

"Well, the thing is, I'm shameless. My shamelessness cannot be measured by mere words. So, of course, do you want to go on a date later on?" Akihiko asked with a smile as Sakura looked up again.

"Yes! Thank you!" Sakura shouted enthusiastically as she went and hugged Akihiko for a short second.

Then she went on and hugged Ino and Hinata as she thanked them.

"Thank you for helping me!"

"It's fine." Hinata replied with a smile as she thought, 'After all, Akihiko should have many lovers. Who shall I convince next? Hanabi?'

Ino also just laughed and waved her hand.

"It's fine. It's fine."

"So, will you girls talk to each other for a while? Someone just visited the Uchiha Household." Akihiko asked as Ino nodded.

"Yeah, we'll talk here. Bye Akihiko!"

"Oh right, Sakura. Is tomorrow evening fine for the date?"

"Yes. I'm free anytime!" Sakura replied quickly as she nodded.

"Alright. Bye."

Hinata and Sakura also waved goodbye as Akihiko just disappeared.

"So, Sakura. Let's go to the park and talk, alright?" Hinata said with a smile as Sakura nodded.

The three of them headed over to the park as they talked there for quite some time.

-----

Tsunade was currently rubbing her head as she thought of the problems. Akatsuki had several Kage-level powerhouses and she knew the details from Deidara's intel. She was thinking if she should make the decision of whether to hunt the Akatsuki members one by one.

Shizune opened the door and walked inside the office with a sake bottle.

"Lady Tsunade, do you want to drink some sake? You seem stressed."

"Yeah thanks, Shizune." Tsunade said with a smile as she took the sake bottle and chugged it.

"Shizune, you want to leave earlier, right?"

"Yes, Lady Tsunade."

"Can you ask Akihiko to come and meet me here in the office? We have important things to discuss."

"Of course, Lady Tsunade." Shizune happily hummed a song and continued working as she can leave the work earlier today.

'*sigh* Why are there so many fucking problems? I just want to give this position to someone else. Akihiko? Nah, he'll probably run away from the duties. Jiraiya? He'll also decline the position.'

Tsunade continued thinking of who to pass the Hokage position to as she continued working on her paperwork.

-----

*sigh*

"I hope I made the right gamble. But whatever the risk, if I can get immortality, I can sacrifice anything." Orochimaru said with a grin.

-----

"Kisame, supply your chakra. We'll extract the Sixth Tail now."

"Yes, Leader."

Pain just dropped Utakata's body onto the hands of the Gedo statue as Kisame started working on the extraction.

'With this, we have gathered the One Tail, Three-Tails, Four Tails, Five Tails and Sixth Tails. Only the Two, Seven, Eight and Nine are left.' Nagato thought as he made plans.

Nagato, with his real body, talked to Konan.

"Konan, can you spy on Konoha for a short while. We'll be advancing with our plan after your return."

"Mm."

Konan just nodded as two paper wings appeared behind her back.

She started flying towards Konoha but it would take a while before she arrived there.

-----

"My brother, I lost the rap competition, but I will not lose my aspiration. I'll return there and win, this is my ambition- yo!" Bee rapped with emotion as Ay just sighed.

*sigh*

*BONK*

"BEE! You'll be punished for sneaking away from Kumogakure. We have problems right now. The greedy fools decided to send a war threat to Konoha."

"Oh, brother! Let me be the ambassador, I'll go and apologize!"

*Bonk*

"Apologize my ass. You cannot leave Kumogakure again. You'll just sneak away again."

At that moment, Yugito Nii entered the room as she heard the conversation. After all, Ay was yelling loudly.

"Raikage-sama, allow me to be the ambassador to Konoha. It is my duty as a ninja of Kumogakure."

"Hmm. Mabui, is Samui on any mission?"

"No, Raikage-sama."

"Alright, Yugito, you will go to Konoha together with Samui this time."

"Thank you, Raikage-sama."

"Now, it's punishment time for those greedy fools." Ay said as he cracked his neck and walked towards the prison.

-----

Akihiko was taking his time walking towards the Uchiha Household as he made plans in his mind.

'The Akatsuki should have got more tailed beasts. I should start my plans now. Yugito. She would probably be targeted by the Akatsuki. She's already attracted to me a bit, so I can step up the game. For Temari, I'll visit her next week. Hmm, Tsunade… she'll probably be too focused on Akatsuki right now.

Pain's assault in Konoha is nothing to worry about. I can beat him with a frying pan. Nagato will most likely send Konan or someone else to check Konoha for a while. After all, I'm a Konoha-nin. But since I used genjutsu to make it look like I struggled while fighting against the 5 Pains, it should make him think that Deva Path would be enough to fight me. And the plan will continue.

I already killed Kabuto and everyone else in the lair so Zetsu's only plan is to use Orochimaru for resurrecting Madara.

Kaguya's on the moon and with my current strength, I'll just destroy the moon. Just have to put some chakra in my strikes. Unseal Kaguya and kill Toneri at the same time. I should probably steal the Tenseigan too.

With that, I can easily destroy the Eye of the Moon Plan. Obito would most likely come and try to capture the Two and Nine-Tails using any means possible. Well, all my wives can easily beat him to death.

He should still be thinking that he has everyone on his palm, while in reality, he was just dancing on my palms.

After everything is over, I'll just live a peaceful life together with all my wives and daughters.

Akihiko smiled as he finally finished his monologue. Yes, although everything he did seemed random, he had a small plan for everything.

{a/n: You should already know that even though Akihiko is easygoing and some other positive things, he's "slightly" manipulative.}

*ding*

[Make your plans come true]

[Description: The System has heard your thoughts and decided to make a mission on it.]

[Reward: Chakra Fruit, Greater Knowledge of Space-Time Seals, System Upgrade, System's Limit will be broken, everyone's power in the Family Section will be increased by 15%, ??? Ticket]

[Time Limit: 2 years]

[Penalty: A bit of delay in your plans]

[Yes/No]

'Haha, my partner. Thanks for the mission. I accept it.'

[Mission Accepted]

'Also, why are these only a few missions given to me?'

[The System has been adapted to the host's lazy personality and became lazy.]

'Oh. Ok. That's good. Things are troublesome if there are many missions.'

{a/n: Were the rewards too op?}

Akihiko arrived in front of the house as he just walked in. The seal didn't activate as he was the one who made it. In front of the door, he heard laughing sounds as he just smiled and entered the house.

"Yeah, it was really funny back then."

"Oh! I didn't know he had a side like that. He was really scary when I met him. He just killed lots of snakes in Ryuichi Cave."

"What?"

"Um, I'm back."

However, the kids didn't run towards him and jump on him immediately.

"Dear, the kids are asleep right now." Mikoto answered as Akihiko sighed a breath of relief.

"Ah, I thought my daughters don't like me anymore."

"See Grizz, I told you. Boss is like the legendary daughter-con!"

*whisper*

"Shut up, Panda. Do you want to be trained by Boss or get your daily cookie amount cut off?"

Panda shook his head with fear and Aisu was warning the two with his hands.

"Hm? Aisu, what are y-"

He didn't get to finish as he turned his head and saw Akihiko's smiling face.

"AHHHHHHHH!"x2

Gurizu and Panda ran away as fast as possible.

Aisu just sat down quietly as he tried to say that he didn't have a part in any of this.

"Good job, Aisu. You'll get more cookies today."

Gurizu and Panda who heard it outside just grumbled.

"Panda, why did you have to do it?"

"I don't know but we should hide for now. ALMIGHTY BUSH!"

A bush appeared as they both hid in there.

Akihiko, who gave Aisu some cookies, just went on the chair and sat there.

"So, Great Snake Sage, what are you doing here?"

"I just came to eat cookies." The Snake Sage said with her mouth full.

"Drink some water." Haku gave a cup of iced water to her as she happily drank it.

"Thank you!"

The Snake Sage finished eating the cookies and she then made a sad expression.

"What's wrong, Snake Sage?" Pakura asked as Snake Sage pouted.

"I have a name. I'm ehh…. ummmm…." She started thinking of a good name on the spot.

"I'm Shiori!" She shouted as she nodded happily. She just made this name right on the spot.

"So, errrr, Shiori, what are you going to do now?" Kushina asked.

"I'm returning back to the cave. I told my subordinates that I'll be returning after getting the cookies. But I can visit here anytime, right?" She asked with a hopeful expression.

"Of course, you can!" Kushina replied immediately as the Snake Sage now known as Shiori hugged her.

Akihiko didn't say anything and just took out lots of cookies from his inventory.

"Here, Snake S- Shiori, take these cookies. These should take a while for you to finish." Akihiko said as he gave the cookies to her.

"Thank you! Now, bye-bye everyone!"

After saying goodbye to everyone, she summoned herself back to Ryuichi cave. However, she didn't change back to her Snake form. It was because she thought the human form was more interesting.

"So, my dear wives, do you want to spar?"

"Sure!"x8

Ayame was still helping Teuchi and learning more Ramengan moves at the same time.

"We should probably go somewhere else. This place will be destroyed if we spar here."

Akihiko knew the perfect place for sparring. However, before he teleported with his wives, he made several wood clones for the protection of his babies.

-----

Naruto was currently with Jiraiya. They were both lying on the grassy land as they looked up at the sky. Naruto already knew how to combine chakra natures with rasengan. He was now thinking about how to throw a rasengan. No matter how many times he tried, he could not do it.

"Perverted Sage, you're writing your autobiography, right?"

"Yeah."

"Need a hand?"

"Ehhh, no. No for both questions."

{a/n: Get it? Get it? Need a "hand".}

"Oh ok. Perverted Sage, I have a question."

"Tell me, Naruto."

"How do you throw a rasengan?"

"Naruto, have you gone crazy? Rasengan is a technique that cannot be thrown."

"But Akihiko did it."

"What?!"

"Yeah, crazy right. I never thought about throwing a rasengan before seeing that. Also, I'm learning how to combine chakra nature into a rasengan."

"If you succeed in combining a chakra nature into a rasengan, it will become a S-rank ninjutsu. Naruto, do you want me to help you?"

"Sure, Perverted Sage."

They both got up as they walked towards an open ground to experiment.

-----

Kakashi was walking around the village with a black-haired woman who was in civilian clothing. Hanare looked around to see a yellow-haired man whose bangs were covering one of his eyes, walking around with a handsome purple-haired man. The yellow-haired man was eating cookies maniacally.

Yes, this was Akihiko's wood clone which Akihiko made to monitor Deidara.

However, she just turned her head back towards Kakashi as she spoke.

"You must be some kind of fool. You're showing me around the village I infiltrated into."

Kakashi didn't reply and just continued walking towards the tree. Hanare was a few meters away from Kakashi as Kakashi finally spoke.

"You don't have to keep your distance from me. I was just asked to spend a day with you."

Kakashi's own love story was starting and this one day will somehow be the start of his marriage.

-----

[Akihiko]

"Are you here to destroy the forest again?"

"5000 cookies."

"*whispers* Can't you give me some of the cookies you gave me last time?"

"Oh, you mean weed cookies?"

"Yeah."

"Take 10 of them. They're rare so I can't give you too many."

Well, this was partially true. Since this was something only Akihiko could make. He also didn't make too many as this was mostly for others and not for himself.

"Alright."

The elder bird happily flew away thinking he could get away without anyone knowing but he just got attacked by his fellow birds who came to get some cookies.

Luckily, his weed cookies didn't get stolen.

Akihiko and his wives except Ayame stood 10 meters away from each other as Akihiko said.

"Use all your strength. Don't try to hold back. Attack me with all you got."

"Are you sure?" x 8

Akihiko just nodded.

"Then, let's start our spar."

(End-)

=====

Well, this is it for today.

Did you guys like the chapter?

Yes.

Definitely Yes.

If you have any suggestions, write them here.

I hope you have a nice day.

Proofread by: MagnuS and AscendedOne