Episode 27

It was supposed to be a normal day in Lavatoria, which, as far as days in this town go, meant dealing with the occasional ridiculous adventurer or a mysterious magical mishap. But even by Lavatoria's standards, this was something else.

The day started out harmless enough. Nixie, Ursha, and I were having lunch in the local tavern, enjoying the relative peace after our latest misadventure. The tavern was lively, filled with the usual crowd of gruff adventurers, merchants, and townsfolk. I was finally starting to feel like maybe things could calm down for once.

That was, of course, until the first wave hit.

It began with a faint rumbling sound, low and ominous, like distant thunder. At first, I thought it was just someone moving furniture upstairs, but then I noticed the other patrons starting to shift uncomfortably in their seats. A few of them clutched their stomachs, their faces pale.

Nixie, sipping on her drink, raised an eyebrow. "You hear that?" she asked, glancing around the room.

"Yeah," I said, rolling in place. "Sounds like someone had a bad batch of ale."

Then it hit. All at once, every person in the tavern, every adventurer, every merchant, even the tavern staff, suddenly lurched forward, clutching their stomachs in agony. There was an audible groan that rippled through the room, and I could see the panic setting in.

"Oh no," one of the adventurers whimpered, doubling over in his chair. "Not now… not here… I need to go… right now!"

That's when I realized something was terribly wrong. People began scrambling out of their seats, heading for the tavern's bathroom in a mad rush. But there was just one problem, the tavern had only one bathroom, and the line was already out the door.

And then, they saw me.

"Wait a minute," one of the panicked adventurers gasped, pointing in my direction. "That's… that's the toilet! The magical one!"

Suddenly, all eyes in the tavern were on me. I could feel the terror building inside as every single person in the room realized the same thing: I was their only option.

"Oh no," I muttered. **"Oh, no no no, "

Before I could even roll away, the entire tavern surged toward me in a wave of desperate, bowel-clenching agony. They needed relief, and they needed it now.

"Jake!" Nixie yelled, leaping to her feet. **"We've got to get out of here!"

But it was too late. The first adventurer reached me, his eyes wide with desperation as he unbuckled his pants. "I'm sorry, man," he whimpered. **"I've got no choice!"

I barely had time to process what was happening before the adventurer sat down on me. The moment he did, I felt it, a surge of power, a horrifying surge of power. As the adventurer let out a relieved sigh and the inevitable sound of nature took its course, I could feel the magical energy inside me swelling, growing stronger with every second.

"Oh god," I muttered, feeling the sheer trauma of the experience. **"This is… the worst."

But despite the psychological horror of having random people taking massive dumps in me, there was something else happening, a strange, inexplicable power-up. I could feel my magical energy building, growing stronger with each "donation" from the poor, cursed townspeople.

The first adventurer finished, staggering away from me with a look of relief. "Thanks, man," he said, wiping his brow. **"You're a lifesaver."

I didn't have time to respond before the next one arrived. A large, burly merchant with a desperate look in his eyes practically threw himself onto me, groaning as he, too, relieved himself.

"Why is this happening to me?" I groaned, feeling the magical energy inside me swell even more.

It wasn't just the tavern. As more and more people rushed in, it became clear that the entire town of Lavatoria had been hit by this mysterious curse. Everyone, from adventurers to shopkeepers to the mayor himself, was in desperate need of a toilet, and I was the only one available.

The crowd around me grew, each person waiting their turn to relieve themselves, and each one adding to the growing pool of magical power inside me. I could feel my body practically vibrating with energy, but with each new level-up came the growing horror of what I had to endure.

Nixie and Ursha were doing their best to hold off the crowd, but even they couldn't resist the effects of the curse.

"Jake," Nixie whimpered, clutching her stomach as she doubled over. **"I… I don't know how much longer I can hold it…"

Ursha, usually so tough and stoic, was in the same predicament. "I hate this," she growled, her face pale. **"I hate this so much."

I stared at them, wide-eyed. **"No. No, please. Not you guys too, "

But it was no use. The curse had hit them both, and in the end, even my closest companions had no choice. With looks of utter humiliation, both Nixie and Ursha took turns using me.

The power surge that followed was enormous. I could feel the magic inside me reach a breaking point as both of them added their own "contributions" to the endless stream of cursed dumps.

"I'm sorry, Jake," Nixie whimpered, standing up shakily after finishing her turn. **"This is… this is the worst thing I've ever done."

Ursha just grunted, her face flushed with embarrassment. **"Let's never talk about this again."

I could barely respond. My body was glowing brightly now, practically bursting with new magical power, but the trauma… oh, the trauma. The level-up was undeniable, but it came at such a terrible cost.

By now, the situation had spiraled completely out of control. The tavern was packed with cursed townspeople, each more desperate than the last, and the line to use me stretched out the door and down the street. Every few seconds, another person took their turn, groaning with relief as they added to the seemingly endless stream of magical dumps being deposited inside of me.

Each new "visit" sent another surge of power coursing through my porcelain frame, but the trauma of enduring this was wearing on me in ways I couldn't begin to describe. Every time someone sat down on me, I had to fight the overwhelming urge to scream, or flush them away forever. But, as horrible as it was, I could feel myself growing stronger with each new level-up.

"I can't believe this is happening," I muttered to myself, my porcelain body glowing with magical energy. **"Why me? Why a toilet?"

Nixie and Ursha, who had just finished their own traumatic experiences, stood off to the side, looking pale and shaken. Even they couldn't escape the curse, and now they were stuck watching as more and more people came in to use me.

"This is insane," Nixie said, still clutching her stomach. **"How is this curse even real? Who did this to us?"

Ursha, who had been pacing angrily by the tavern door, crossed her arms and grunted. **"I don't know, but whoever's responsible is going to pay. This is beyond humiliating."

"Jake," Nixie said softly, looking over at me. **"Are you okay?"

I stared at her, my porcelain body still vibrating with the sheer amount of energy flowing through me. **"I don't think I'll ever be okay again, Nixie. I'm… I'm traumatized. I've never had this many people take dumps in me."

She cringed. **"Yeah… sorry about that. I really didn't want to, but the curse, "

"It's fine," I interrupted, though it really wasn't. **"Let's just get through this."

The crowd kept coming, each person adding to my growing power, and as horrible as the experience was, something strange started happening. With each new "user," I could feel new abilities unlocking inside me, as if the sheer force of this curse was evolving me in ways I couldn't have imagined.

I was still reeling from the last round of dumps when I felt a strange, tingling sensation in my hands, or what should have been my hands, if toilets had them. Slowly, my porcelain frame began to shift, and to my shock, my hands transformed into… urinals.

"Oh, come on!" I groaned, staring down at the urinal-hands. **"This is ridiculous."

Before I could process what was happening, one of the men from the tavern, already in line, caught sight of my new urinal appendages and gasped.

"Whoa!" he shouted, his eyes lighting up with excitement. **"Did you see that? He's got urinals for hands!"

Several other men in the tavern turned to look, their faces lighting up in the same way. It was clear that, to them, this was a dream come true, a magical toilet with urinals for hands.

"We've got to try it!" one of the men said, already unbuckling his pants.

I backed up as far as I could, horrified. **"No! No, please, not this too! I've been through enough today!"

But it was too late. The men surged toward me, eager to test out my new urinal-hands, and I had no choice but to let them. One after another, they stepped up, using my urinal-hands as if this was the most normal thing in the world. Each time they relieved themselves, I could feel another surge of magical power building inside me, adding to the already overwhelming amount of energy I'd accumulated.

"This is a nightmare," I muttered as the line of men continued to take their turns. **"I didn't ask for this. Why is this my life?"

Nixie, watching the whole scene with a mix of horror and amusement, shook her head. **"Well, on the bright side, it looks like you're leveling up again."

"That's not a bright side," I groaned. **"I'd rather go back to being a normal toilet."

Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, another wave of magic surged through me, and I felt my porcelain body shift again. This time, the sensation was focused around my lower half, or, more specifically, where my flush valve should be.

Before I knew what was happening, a stream of water shot out from beneath me, hitting one of the tavern walls with enough force to blast a hole straight through it.

"What the, ?" I stared in shock, watching the water jet shoot from me like a powerful bidet on overdrive. The force was incredible, more than I'd ever felt before. This wasn't just water; this was water magic.

Nixie's eyes widened as she watched the stream of water obliterate a section of the tavern wall. **"Whoa! Jake, you've got bidet powers now?"

I blinked, still trying to process what had just happened. **"Apparently. But it's not just any bidet power, this is… water magic!"

Ursha, who had been standing near the door, raised an eyebrow. **"Well, that's new. Useful, though. If anyone gets out of line, you can blast them across the room with that."

I was about to respond when another surge of people rushed into the tavern, their faces filled with the same desperate panic as everyone else who had been hit by the curse. The line to use me stretched out the door, and I could feel the pressure inside me building again.

"Not again," I groaned, preparing myself for yet another round of cursed dumps.