Reason For Being( Part 2)

It took a week until they finished the book. And Rumius's victories over the language of this world was short lived.

There were times where he had managed to somewhat guess the meaning of other words but after collapsing from the mental exhaustion of memorizing, second guessing and the toll of frustration, only a handful of words stayed with him.

It was morning again and once again, the young maid who he had come to know as Rennie was preparing his meal.

The cycle was becoming monotonous and dull at this point and as the feeling sunk in, Rumius couldn't help but feel helpless.

It was still sleep, wake up, eat, crap, sleep, wake up, eat, crap. Nothing had changed. Nothing. He'd achieved next to nothing in the last one week since he'd discovered magic. It was basically a waste of time. 

He didn't even want to think of all the time wasted before that. All those days of complacent nothing.

' What am I even doing?' 

Rumius could feel his fingernails digging into his palm. It hurt but Rumius didn't stop. It almost felt like righteous punishment.

' Is this what I want? What am I even doing? How many people even get a second chance like this?'

 The thought evoked distant memories to the surface. In his past life, Rumius had no complaints about how he lived.. He didn't live a great life, accomplish outstanding feats or became anything worth coming up in the conversations of the neighbors next door but he did feel that he had a good life.

If he were to sum it up in a few words,' Honest',' Humble' and' Fortunate' would suffice.

 But ' Ambition' wasn't one of them. The one word that saturated the lives of stars, leaders, great people. His life didn't have that.

But was it really never there? Did he never dream of standing upon that pedestal, looking down at the world below and feeling the power tied to his name?

No.

No!

No! He wanted it! He wanted all of it!

Even he looked up to them! Even he wanted to become one of them!

But as a child, as a teenager, as an adult, he had never really chased after this dream. It was his ambition, how he wanted his story to unfold but yet he never took up the shovel to dig a path towards it. 

It was innumerable. The many times that he lacked the courage to push through. The many hundreds of times where he would always say, ' Tomorrow' or 'Later' or ' After this'. And by the time he came around again, the golden egg of chance had already rolled on

Did he want a repeat? Did he want to live a life where he continually flailed around but never learnt to swim? Did he want to write the same nameless story or did he want to create a path that ,although streaked with tears, sweat and blood, would be a story that will endure the tests of time?

Did he even have to think?

Obviously the second! Obviously! 

Outside his raging mindscape, Rumius looked up at the ceiling. His jaw ached from clenching and his fingernails had left deep marks on his palm.

" It's never too late huh…"

He'd never believed it but now, perhaps now, he could really do it. Because if not, then when would he? 

It was almost as if something had snapped and perhaps it was there that "I" truly died.

Rumius woke up the next day to manhandling. The first thing he noticed was Maman forcefully stripping him of his undergarments and second, was Rennie's troubled face as she looked on from the sidelines. 

The two women were talking in hushed tones probably to avoid waking him, not like he wasn't already.

Being the mega brained baby he was, Rumius naturally didn't burst into tears like the everyday infant joe, but it was in itself of not being the everyday infant Joe that Rumius knew he had to put up the crying act.

While it wasn't great, practiced certainly did help make perfect.

Tears rolled down Rumius's cheeks as he wailed, practically brawling his eyes out in a Nobel winning act.

The two women froze and immediately tended to his needs, hushing him, stroking him and kissing his forehead to calm him down.

Through his crocodile tears, Rumius sniffled and said:

" Maman…Mme rande ichl.."( Maman…I'm hungry..) 

The amber eyed woman leaned down, bringing Rumius up closer to her and touched foreheads with his. Stroking his head gently, she hushed:

" Manan clara ich vain, roro mis ri noro?"( Maman knows, hold on a little okay?)

" Noro… mat dich firt ten."( Ok, but hurry up alright?)

Rumius had to work hard to get to where he was now but he loved the feeling of progress that he'd made. He couldn't understand everything that his Maman or Rennie said, but more often than not he could already understand the gist.

Maman gave a bright smile: "Bin hon".( Good boy)

Rennie simply looked on in amazement. Since working at the Eldmich manor was the first job that she'd ever gotten, she hasn't had much experience with babies. Apart from the one or two odd babysitting jobs that she had taken back in the village that she'd come from.

However, there was something incredible about how fast the young master progressed. One could even say that it was genius. She had never seen a baby make so much progress so fast before.

Maman soon made quick work of Rumius's soiled pair of diapers and upon finishing, pulled down her left blouse, revealing a side of her plump chest. Maman brought Rumius in close and tucked his mouth snugly into her exposed nipple.

Rumius initially didnt know why he wasn't breastfed more often and was given gruel since it was almost entirely the reverse from his experience. But occurred to him like just how people here could fly, making the breastfeeding phase of motherhood optional was probably a walk in the park.

But regardless, whenever Maman came by during his feeding sessions, she would always breast feed him. The warmth and affection of such an experience was out of this world and it made Rumius wish that every feeding session would be like this. It was like being covered in the physical manifestation of his Maman's love.

Rumius sucked for as long and hard as he could, tucked in his Maman's arms and when he finally pulled back, he let slip his guard and it just slipped out. It was only about as loud as a sign of contentment but if said while in such close proximity, it was a given that it would be heard.

" Ohhhh thanks mom, that was great.."