Just Let Me Sleep

Somehow I saw her. I stared in the mirror my black hair sticking to my pale face, sweat dampening my skin. Staring back at me like an after image were two sharp, bright yellow eyes. Eyes that were surrounded by thick, soft black fur. My wolf was staring back at me. How was that possible? I had three years before I was supposed to be able to connect to her and yet here she is showing herself to me at the age of eighteen. The hell was going on? My breathing was heavy, the bathroom a total mess. Bottles were strewn over the floor, the towel rack was holding on by one mount to the wall. My mind continued to race. Seriously what the fuck was going on…

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I snuggled into my bed more. Nothing was going to get me up this morning. I wasn't doing it. Who decided that five in the morning was a good time to start the day? I could barely hear any birds even waking up. I buried my face into my pillow and pulled my comforter up to my neck. Yeah not getting up. Ba-rliiiing! I jolted up out of my comfort. "Who the hell set the alarm!" I whined as I tried to search for it. My phone was mysteriously under my bed, just out of reach as I tried to lean over the side to grab it. I sighed and rolled out of bed, almost literally, the phone still blaring my alarm. I hate getting up…

I finally grabbed the device that shouted an annoying noise at me, my ears still ringing. I hate getting up from obnoxious sounds more. I laid on my floor staring up at my ceiling. I was almost missing high school now, at least I could get up at eight then. I dragged my feet over to my closet, pulling out a simple t-shirt, a light blue hoodie with amazingly deep pockets and my hiking boots. Leggings and a pair of socks with bananas on them later I was ready and making my way out to the kitchen. As I turned the corner I saw Izar, my brother sitting at the table, headphones on, his shaggy jet black hair clipped back with a Bobby pin to keep it out of his eyes. As he noticed me he moved one side of his ear phones, "Finally, what the fuck were you doing in there?"

I slumped down into a chair and rested my head on the table "Do we have to do this today?" I sighed, fatigue failing to leave me.

"Yeah you do, and you're late anyways" my sister, Aella, set a cup of coffee next to me as she crossed her arms in front of her. Her piercing blue eyes gave me her best mom look. "Seriously Astra, how can you sleep through twelve alarms?" She asked, flabbergasted.

"Twelve? Isn't that a new record?" Izar chuckled as he poked my cheek. These two annoying, I mean lovely people are the twins, and the oldest children of my parents Nora and Styrmir Alder. How my mother managed to want to have me after dealing with these two I will never know but good for her.

"I'm so tiiired" I sighed into the grain of the table. I've always had a problem waking up. Mom loved it apparently, I slept through the night fairly early as a newborn, but when I was starting to oversleep, like twenty hours a day if given the chance, and not wake up for anything they started to get worried. Apparently it's normal to be a bit tired before you connect with your wolf but I'm an extreme case.

"Too bad get your ass up" my brother lifted me by my hood and my sister switched my coffee into a travel mug for me.

"The faster you get this over with the faster you can be done" Aella encouraged as we headed out the door.

"Yeah, yeah" I tilted my travel mug at her "thanks!" And out the door we went. Now time to hike 3 miles, over hills, through thick trees, over streams, all while the sun was still gone from the sky. Yay training.

Being a wolf consists of three important moments in our lives. First, when you turn eighteen you start getting your enhanced abilities, speed, strength, hearing, enhanced smell, you know the good ol "wolfy things".

Twenty-one you meet your wolf, this happens multiple ways and it is different for everyone. You gain the ability to shift and become one with your wolf and some can have another special ability, again varying on the person. The twins have two, twin-thapy, twin telepathy, this is different then mind linking. The twins even before they were 18 could connect to each other, feel each other's emotions and could communicate amazing distances. Their second ability that they gained is suggestion. Well to the extent of, people who are extremely weak willed, or intoxicated can be affected by them. Anyone outside of that can resist them if they really want to.

Between the ages of twenty-two and twenty-five you usually can find your mate. This is a connection that is impressed into your soul the moment you are born. Once awakened you gain the ability to sense that person. You can tell from their smell and presence that they are your soulmate. It's a love at first sight moment but more intense, which seems super dramatic but whatever. I mean I get falling in love or liking someone, but it's a little weird to me to just instantly fall in love with someone I don't even know.

We finally reached the Alder's training spot. "You're late" my dad called out, from a small hill top.

"Well sleeping beauty here slept through twelve alarms" Izar pointed back at me with his thumb. I glared slightly as I came up behind him.

"Oh wow a new record" dad looked at me, almost impressed.

"Can we just start?" I spoke with annoyance as I threw my shoulder length hair into a ponytail. Trust me I wish I wasn't this tired all the time. I've been eighteen for eight months now and I feel like the exhaustion has just got worse. Which is kind of funny cause you would think getting closer to twenty-one and meeting my wolf would you know make me less tired but no. Fuck me.

We all walked over to a part of our training area. Since I turned eighteen and got my abilities I've been here pretty much everyday honing my supernatural skills. First up, a supernatural race with my dad and brother.

We all got to the edge of the woodline. I graduated from racing through fields a while ago and now I'm trying not to smack my face right into a tree. Which I've only done twice but definitely 10 out of 10 do not recommend.

We ready ourselves to push off the start line. Ready… set… g- "Hey Izar that's cheating!" I yelled running after him as he sped across the hilly terrain obviously sprinting off before "go". How this person is twenty-five I will never know. Both dad and him were well ahead of me. Like the wind, they easily cut through the thick forest and lept over obstacles. Even though they weren't shifted they were incredible. Each tree I passed was a blur. Streaks of brown and green zipped by. My legs ran as fast as they could, the competitive side of me breaking through as I tried to catch up. How much did my family train to be able to do this with ease? I felt like my future was grim with training for the rest of my life. My breath was already harsh as I tried to control it. We finally ended our "warm up." Coming in last I was breathing heavily.

"Good job kid, you're getting faster" my dad encouraged.

"It" wheeze. "Doesn't" wheeze. "Feel like it" I finally got more than one word out as I caught my breath.

"You ready to spare?" Izar excitingly came up behind me, completely fine. That's annoying.

"Can I say no?" I stretched my legs. I was already feeling my muscles start to loosen and constrict at the same time from the run.

"You can but you're still doing it" my dad threw padded gloves at my brother. Izar has a habit of not holding back when it came to sparring. Dad says he does hold back but this guy is a monster and I'm pretty sure dad's and my definition of "holding back" are two different things.

We stood in a cleared dirt circle. Dad as referee. "Alright Astra, your focus is to try and land a hit on your brother. Remember to pay attention to ALL of your senses" he yelled at me. We have been doing the same thing for months, not once have I even touched a hair of Izar's. I took my breaths. My hands instinctively came up to my sides. My fists just loose enough as they blocked the side of my face. Izar did the same, except he had a stupid grin on his face.

"Begin!" Dad shouted. Before I could react Izar was in front of me. My body prepared for his first punch. He went for my stomach, I brought my elbow down and swept my arm to the side so he didn't hit me. This made him grin more. I quickly brought my guard back up and started taking steps backwards. I was dodging, but barely. Luckily Izar had a set of moves he liked to do, but being fast enough to counter those attacks effectively was a different story.

The hair on my arms stood up, tingles ran down my spine. My instincts to protect myself started to urgently appear. I tried to control my breathing as my brother continued to throw his fists at me. He was controlled but ruthless. I felt the ground under my shoes as I became hyper aware of each step. Suddenly my ears picked up Izar's breathing. And my eyes adjusted to his movements. While still incredibly fast I could see the fluid motion more easily. Maybe I could-

I quickly threw my own jab, Izar blocking his side. Quickly! I changed my footing and threw my other hand toward his face as I saw an opening. He blocked it just as fast. His eyes flashed with glee. I'm screwed.

Somehow this knuckle head sped up his attacks even more. Great, he has been holding back. I dodged to the left blocking my face, the wind from his fist undoing my hair tie. My eyes were wide. "What the fuck Izar?!" I yelled as he kept punching, my defense that I thought I built up over the months was quickly becoming my weakness as it became harder to fight back. "Are you trying to kill me?"

"Oh come on Asty you know you'll be fine!" Suddenly a quick jab landed on my stomach. I coughed, spit flying out of my mouth. I took as many steps as I could to put distance between him and I. My stomach throbbed as I could feel an instant bruise forming and as much as I wanted to hold it I knew the second I dropped my guard Izar would easily knock me on my ass.

He gave me no time, as he ran after me. Fuck, fuck, fuck! Each punch was whipping through the air. I was almost afraid to block it as I kept dodging. I ducked down and everything slowed. My heart was pounding in my ears louder and faster than it has in a while during a sparring match but everything around me almost stood still. 'Now!' A voice rang in my ear faintly. My body quickly moved without thought as I stretched out my leg and swept it toward my brother's legs. He was still in a slight lunge from his attack. As his body was reacting, his fist pulling back to place, I saw a quick flash of surprise on his face as everything started to speed up again. He started to try and jump away and as he was my foot caught his ankle causing him to stumble backwards. I stood up as fast as I could, getting in my stance instantly.

"Enough!" My father's voice rang out. Izar was already in front of me again, his fist an inch away from my nose. A look of disappointment fell on his face. I stared, surprised. Surprised that Izar's fist was so close. Surprised that I could actually see a bit of sweat on his brow. Surprised that I caught his ankle! Surprised that I landed a hit! Surprised that I didn't accidentally die cause Izar can't hold his ass back! I broke out into my own grin. That grin turned into a chuckle, then a laugh as I fell back onto the dirt ring.

"I did it!" I laughed. Eight months and I finally was able to make Izar stumble! "I finally did it!" I sighed. My breathing was wheezing out of my lungs as I shut my eyes tight. Adrenaline started to leave my body causing my legs and hands to start shaking. I replayed the moment in my head. The way everything just happened. 'Now' I remembered the words. What was that?

"Good job nugget!" My dad shouted with pride as he came over breaking me from my thoughts.

"Daaad" I griped at my nickname, still on the ground. He pulled me up and onto my feet with ease and gave me a huge bear hug.

"You did so well sweetheart" he said. I hugged him back tightly. It felt great, even though my body was constantly exhausted it didn't seem so bad to be able to almost knock my brother on his ass.

"Holy shit Asty! Good job" Izar gave me a fist bump, and a hug of his own.

"Maybe now I won't have to fear for my life everytime we spare" I joked.

"Oh come on! It's not that bad, plus you'll heal anyways"

"Yeah but slow as hell!" I complained, "I'd rather not have a black eye again."

My brother and dad started to walk back home, the training session over for the day. I took a small step forward my legs shaking more from pushing myself too hard. "Guys!" I called to them. They turned and looked at me a few feet away. "Do we have to walk back?" I whined taking a few small steps.

"We didn't bring a car, so yep!" My dad smiled and started to walk back to the house.

Oh yeah… damnit.

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"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!" My whole body tensed up as my sister massaged out my calves.

"Well if you weren't always so competitive we wouldn't have to be doing this" she pushed on my muscles a little harder. I squeeked.

"I couldn't help it! You should have seen the way Izar was coming at me! If I didn't get the small nic on his ankle you would be planning a funeral for your sweet baby sister" I whined to her.

"Goddess you're so dramatic" she finished up and threw the heating pad at me. "You still going over to Trish's tonight?" She asked as she was leaving my room.

I put the heating pad on my neck, wishing I just had a giant heating pad. "Yeah, why whats up?" I looked over at her trying not to die as all my muscles started to become sore all at once.

She stared at me for a long time "Don't wear my clothes" she left the room.

"What the hell?" I mumbled, "I didn't want to wear your clothes anyways!" I yelled out to her. I did want to wear her clothes. "And shut my door!"

Now that I was alone in silence I remembered that voice. It was faint but I definitely heard it. It was familiar, but I didn't know who it belonged to. It was familiar in the way that a dream you started to forget after waking up was familiar. Like you knew what it was but couldn't remember the details. I tried to focus on it, thinking of everyone I knew and how they sound but nothing was matching up. I let out a huge sigh all of my breath escaping my body. Fine, I'm dramatic. I slowly, and painfully grabbed my phone from my night stand. 1130. I had about eight hours before Trish's party, so eight hours to get my life together and get my body moving again. I went to get up laying back into my elbows as I stared down toward my feet, my legs refusing to move. Damnit. I flopped back down and decided to take a small nap.

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It wasn't a small nap! I stared in horror at the time on my phone, 7:00 pm, Trish's party was at 7:30. I once again, quite literally rolled out of bed. "Ow, ow, ow, ow" each movement made my muscles scream at me in pain.

"That's why you should have stretched!" I heard my brother yell from the living room.

"I know!" I yelled back, "Ow, how come no one woke me up!" I panicked, thrusting my closet door open.

"We tried" Dad yelled from the living room, "but we would have better luck waking up the dead"

Damnit! Alright shower, change makeup, shower, change, makeup. I repeated what needed to be done in my head throwing some painkillers in my mouth. That's the shitty thing about getting abilities, you're still basically human until you meet your wolf. Your body takes longer to heal, and muscle aches stayed around for a few days. Brightside painkillers actually worked and you could get drunk a little easier compared to when you have a wolf. So you know loose, win.

My routine quickly somehow finished. My black hair was down and a bit wavy, my brown eyes outlined in just the right amount of eye shadow and eye liner. I threw on my sister's pastel blue cami dress that I've been hiding. It was a more form fitting style compared to other cami's and stopped about mid-thigh. I threw on a silver necklace with a small crescent moon hanging from it with other simple silver accessories. 7:20. Fuck I'm ganna be late. I threw on my light blue vans and grabbed my bag as I started out the door.

"Bye I love you guys" I waved.

"Hey, that's my dress!" I heard my sister complain as I ran to the car.

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I pulled into Trish's yard, a good handful of cars were already there. 7:40 pm. I took a deep breath and stepped out of the car. I didn't go to parties much in highschool its been a month since graduation and all of a sudden I want to go to parties. I think it was the feeling that I was going to be alone as my friends were going to go do their own things after the summer. We all were working with our families or mentors to train our bodies whether or not we wanted to. There have been cases of people either going into a coma, or dieing when they try to turn before their bodies were ready. I sighed as I peered at Trish's two story home, people mingled outside, plastic cups of whatever in their hands. I got up to the door, Ajax, one of Trish's four older brothers greeted me at the door. His hazel, blue eyes lighting up "Hey kid, welcome, welcome!" He smiled at me, putting a plastic container in front of me. I dropped my car keys in with the others. The Launders were pretty good about throwing their parties. Two people from the family were sober and designated drivers every time. All of Trish's brothers were above 5'11" and Ajax was usually the one to run the door because he was the tallest coming in at 6'5" and with his brawny built he could easily throw someone out if they were being stupid. I mean in a literally sense, I saw him throw out a kid who wouldn't Trish and I alone. He picked up the guy by his belt and the collar of his shirt and just chucked him out the door. Ajax didn't even look phased.

Ajax met the other guests behind me as they came in. Trish saw me across the room. She waved excitedly. "Asty!" She pretty much ran to meet me. Her long sandy blonde hair that was pulled up in a high ponytail bounced as we met in the middle of the living room. Music was already blaring and people were already starting to dance around. Drink in hand. "You're late girl!" She yelled over the music, handing me a plastic cup. I took a sip, pink lemonade with vodka. She knew me so well.

"Yeah my bad" I yelled back to her, "I decided to take a nap" I laughed a bit as Trish shook her head. We've been friends since little, her parents were always traveling for work so Trish and I hung out all the time. We both knew each other's habits well.

"I hate being the only girl home!" She would whine pretty much every time I came over. I had Izar and he was plenty. I definitely couldn't imagine having four older brothers. Dating definitely has been hard on her. I glanced around the room, Trish saw my eyes wonder and smirked. "Atlas is in the game room playing beer pong," she teased. Before she could notice my blush I took a gulp of my drink. Atlas was another brother of Trish's. I don't know when but at some point being around the family so much I started to get a crush on him. It was embarrassing, not because I didn't have any experience dating but because everything about him made me tingle.

"Asty!" I heard my name yelled and quickly turned once more, Eros another brother came over and bear hugged me. "How is little Asty doing?" He teased me as he brushed a strand of his long hair behind his ear.

"Hey! I'm only little cause you're like 8 feet tall" I laughed up at him. Eros was the shortest of the brothers, but at 5'11" he was still a giant to my short ass. Trish's family was like my family and mine were like hers. It was hard not to love them as they were always so amazing to me.

"Oh!" Eros linked arms with me "I have someone I want you to meet!"

"Oh yeah!" Trish chimed, "let's go!" She led the way as Eros and I followed behind. I heard the party music fade as we left the living room and into the game room. Pop punk and other alternative music played a bit more quiet as the hum of conversations continued mixed with cheers as a ping pong ball swirled into the last cup.

My attention quickly snapped to Atlas as he high five the person next to him. I couldn't help but have a crush on him. I bit the corner of my bottom lip. He ran his fingers through his medium length sandy blonde hair. It fell off to the sides of his part after his fingers ran through it. I could hear his warm voice as he congratulated his partner. It was inviting and pleasant and it sent tingles across my body. "Atlas! Dante!" Trish rushed over to her brother and the guy next to him. She spoke to them smiling and pointed over to Eros and I. Atlas turned his head and looked toward me, his cobalt blue eyes sparking my soul. It was so hard not to want those eyes on me. He was twenty-two and didn't have a mate yet. Both mates have to be awakened to know so I was still holding onto the fact that maybe I could be his.

"Astra!" His voice called my name, making my heart race. How could one person do that?

"Atlas!" I beamed back at him running up giving him a hug. It was just for a moment but as his well-built arms wrapped around me I couldn't help but melt. I don't know what I would do if I couldn't be his mate. Every Time I saw Atlas I felt like I was falling harder and deeper for him. I wish I could just tell him how I feel. Maybe then if nothing else before he found his mate I could have a chance with him.

"Hey Eros" the guy next to Atlas gave Eros a quick bro hug "Long time no see man" his voice was slightly deeper than Atlas's, his eyes flickered with excitement as he looked over at me. He quickly reminded me of a golden retriever. His hair was slightly shorter than Atlas's and faded from his ears up. The longer parts layered over in a way that showed he hasn't stayed put since getting here, his golden waves definitely reminded me of a golden retriever. "So who's this?" He asked.

"Oh yes that's why we came over here!" Trish remembered "Astra this is our cousin Dante! Dante, this is my best friend Astra!" She grabbed both of our hands and linked them together in a hand shake.

"Nice to meet you" I smiled genuinely happy to meet their cousin.

"Trish and her brothers have told me so much about you Astra" he shook my hand with a slightly firm but warm grip.

"Now that I got you guys here, grab Ajax and Owen I got something big to share with you guys!" Atlas seemed impatient and ecstatic. My heart raced at whatever he was about to say. I felt like I was the one about to announce something.

We all sat in Atlas's room, his smell covered the air making my heart race more. I'm pretty sure my face was flushed. I took another drink from my cup. Maybe they will just think I'm a bit tipsy. "Alright I wanted to tell you guys first…" he paused and looked around the room while all of us were waiting. "I found my mate!" He beamed breaking the silence and my voice caught in my throat. I held my breath, my heart breaking in a moment. I knew instantly it wasn't me because even though I was over the moon for him there wasn't the soul connecting bond that comes with being mates. Not to mention I wasn't awakened with my wolf yet, it would be a few years before I could experience that bond…

"Congrats!"

"Hell yeah man where did you find them?"

"I'm so happy for you!" Words of excitement came from his family as they hugged him and congratulated him.

I forced my best smile "I'm happy for you Atlas!" I spoke and while it was the truth I was worried my voice was shaking. Trish looked at me with a small sadness in her eyes. She knew how I felt about her brother. I smiled at her to reassure my friend. Dante looked at me with a hint of pity in his eyes as well. Damn was I that see through? I smiled and waved at him slightly. He gave a quick nod and we all went back to giving Atlas our attention as he continued to talk about his mate.

"She's amazing! Her strawberry blonde hair and tan skin smells like coconut and a sun kissed beach" he looked in the far distance, his eyes longing and a calm smile over his face "When she speaks it's like music flows through me and everything around me just fades and it's only her."

It hurt more the way he spoke about her. Why couldn't it have been me? I felt so many emotions that threatened to break through but I stopped myself. I had to stop myself, I wasn't his and he was never mine.

"How did you find her? How did you guys meet?" Eros spoke excitedly.

"When I went out west to the medical expo with my mentor I met her there. She's trying to become a pack pediatrician" he continued, not wanting to stop talking about her and how amazing she was. I stepped back and quietly slipped out into the hall. Finally I took a deep breath but with that breath came tears to my eyes.

'Damnit…' I looked up trying to keep the tears from falling. Trish peeked her head into the hall where she saw me. She gently came over and pulled me into a comforting hug.

"I'm so sorry Asty" she comforted me. I still refused to let the tears fall as I hugged her back.

"Its-" my voice cracked, I cleared my throat "I'm okay" I reassured her. I took another moment calming myself in her arms. Tears never falling. We both took a deep breath and broke the hug. Before anything else could be said Atlas poked his head out of his room.

"There you two are!" He excitedly came over to us. I put on the best smile I could. I wasn't going to cry, he was happy and as much as it hurt that's all I wanted him to be.

Owen came up behind, his burly form towering over Trish and I "You guys ready to go party?" he cheered as we continued down the staircase. "Graduation parties only happen once, or twice if you go to college I guess… but you get what I mean! There is alot to celebrate!"

His family hurried down the stairs, more laughter and music filled the house as the night was only getting started. Dante and I were left to bring up the rear. My movements a little more slow. I felt Dante's eyes on me for a moment. I turned to look at him, his green eyes searching my face. "You okay?" His voice was soft and I stopped in my tracks and looked up at him.

"Yeah" I smiled "of course I am"

He stared a few moments more. "Alright" he finally said. "Well let's go have a blast then" he grabbed my wrist but before he completely pulled me away he glanced back to make sure I was okay with it, his eyes searching my face. I took the last gulp of my drink.

"Yeah let's go!" I cheered both of us heading down the stairs.

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I found myself back in the game room. Trish and I were already on our second cup of mixed drinks laughing about when we were younger and she literally fell on top of me from a tree when she thought a spider landed on her. I could hear Atlas and Dante high fiving in the background. Apparently they have been unbeatable in every round of beer pong they played.

"Ugh boys" Trish rolled her eyes at her family as they fist bumped each other.

"Hey Trish, you want to take us on?" Atlas called.

"Why would I want to?" She spoke bluntly.

"Oh I see, you're scared you'll lose then?" He teased her back. Trish frowned and grabbed my arm.

"Alright you're on! But don't cry when you lose!" Growing up with just guys made her the most competitive person I knew besides my brother. Being her best friend ment I got roped into her competitions.

Standing at the other end of the table I found myself being Trish's partner. "You two ready?" Dante asked.

"Lady's first" Atlas said, throwing the ball to me.

"Don't regret that" I joked back to them, keeping my heart in check. I threw the first pong ball and it swooshed right into a corner cup.

"Hell yeah Asty!" Trish hyped me up. Atlas took a swig of his cup. I could see a small pout at the corner of his lips. Dante looked at me playfully as he brought his cup up to his lips.

"We might regret it," Dante laughed as Atlas scooped the ball and threw it back to Trish. It was a house rule that the same person couldn't throw twice in a row. Trish threw it aiming for the front cup, it clipped the corner and rolled off the table.

"Damnit! Sorry" she sighed.

"Don't worry! We'll get it back" I said confidently. The next twenty minutes was a back and forth battle of beer pong. Finally each team was down to two cups, and up another drink. "You're gowing dwown losers!" Trish slurred. She was already one too many drinks in. I switched her cup for water and quickly chugged hers before she noticed. My alcohol tolerance was luckily higher. Dante noticed this and raised an eyebrow at me. I shrugged, not worried. It was our turn and my turn to throw. Dante and Atlas both watched in anticipation as I threw the ball. It flew in an arch and landed in the first cup spinning on the rim a few times.

"Dammit" I hear Atlas sigh under his breath. "There is no way Trish is going to make this next shot though" he tossed the ball back once more.

"What?! You don't know that!" Trish pouted, catching the ball with ease. Her face was flushed from the alcohol, and talking was a bit hard but I knew something that the other's didn't know. Even though they were family they never noticed how much more coordinated Trish got when she was drunk. To an extent I was waiting for this moment.

"Alright Trishy, you got this!"

"Yeah!"

"Don't let those annoying boys win!"

"I got this!" Trish yelled.

"Yeah you got this!"

"Yeah! Fuck them!" She cheered and readied herself. My hyping up was working.

"This is for Asty and her broken heart!" Trish yelled as she arched the ball. Wait what? It quickly and easily landed in the last cup. Everyone in the room cheered as Atlas hit his forehead on the table. Our opponents finished their drinks and came over to congratulate us. Trish instantly started to rub it in her brother's face. "Ha! That's what you get thinking you're so much better than me!"

"Yeah yeah, you did good." He rolled his eyes playfully. "What was that last part though? Right before you threw it you said Asty had a broken heart?" He questioned and looked at me with a bit of concern in his eyes. My heart stopped. Please don't give me that look.

"What are you talking about man?" Dante stepped into the conversation. "I'm pretty sure Trish said "This party is about to START" he emphasized making sure Atlas heard the rhyming sounds.

"Oooh! Got it!" He turned to me again "I mean last time I knew you didn't have anyone you liked recently right Asty?" My hands got a bit clammy as he stared at me, his eyes caring.

"Yeah! I mean it's been a bit since I've been involved with anyone" I laughed nervously.

"Yeah I was so confused!" He came closer. "Just know, if anyone did break your heart I would break their face" he reassured me a wide comforting grin on his face.

"That would be hard" Dante mumbled under his breath.

"What's up?" Atlas asked.

Dante gave him a confused look "What? Oh I said we should go dance" Dante smiled. They all agreed and headed to the living room. I gently grabbed the back of Dante's shirt and he quickly turned and looked at me.

"Thank you" I mouthed. I don't know if I was super obvious or what but he knew what I felt for his cousin and for whatever reason he was helping me play past it.

"If you want to thank me then how about dancing with me?" he leaned closer and gently took his hand in mine. He looked into my eyes for an answer. Every action where he touched me was soft, like he was asking for permission. If I wanted to I could have easily said no. I could have taken my hand back, but I didn't. Maybe it was the recent, devastating heartbreak that literally happened an hour ago but everything in me said to go with this guy with the forest green eyes and golden blond hair that wanted to dance with me. I needed to forget about any romantic ideas I had for Atlas. I reminded myself I wasn't his.

I smiled at Dante and gripped his hand slightly tighter "Sure!"

He led me to the dance floor, lights, and strobes surrounded the living room. Club and hip hop music blared on the surround sound speakers. Trish was dancing with a guy probably about a year older than her. She pressed her body as close as possible and grinded her body against his. He whispered in her ear and she laughed. I could physically feel the death stare of Ajax and Owen as they watched their baby sister and the unknown guy being flirty. They were making sure she was safe while at the same time trying to watch the rest of the party so nothing sketchy would happen. Dante chuckled behind me as he saw the same thing. He guided me over to Trish and her dance partner. Trish looked at my hand in Dante's and raised an eyebrow with a sly smirk on her face. I laughed and rolled my eyes. The music was still circulating with the crowd of people, it sent shivers across my body. Dante pulled me just close enough where our bodies were only an inch apart. We matched our movements, brushing ever so slightly against each other.

I felt my cheeks warm as the drink I swapped from Trish started to hit me. I giggled to myself as I remembered the swap. I'm sure Trish didn't even realize I gave her water. "Whats so funny?" Apparently Dante heard me. He glanced down at me with a smile and curiosity in his eyes.

"Nothing really" I chimed "just kind of impressed with myself and my sneakiness."

"Oh you mean with Trish's drink?"

"That's right, I forgot you saw that" I laughed more. Okay I'm at least sneaky enough.

"Yeah and since you had her drink, do you even need this?" He scooped my current drink out of my hand. "What's this you're sixth one?" He teased as he dangled the cup above his head.

"Hey!" I stood on my tip toes trying to reach for it, but he was so damn tall. "It's actually my fourth" I complained.

"Alright you're fourth" he corrected with a smile "but can you even handle four?" He teased me once more, leaning his face slightly closer to mine. I noticed his lean body as he came closer to me. I was starting to realize as far as looks went I was into in-shape golden retrievers. I also noticed a small hint of worry in his eyes as brought himself to my level a small look of curiosity on his features. My body relaxed under his gaze despite the excited vibe of the party around me.

"Of course! But even if for some reason I couldn't you could just save me again" I teased him back, taking a step closer, "like you did with Atlas" I peered up to him as I pressed my body into his slightly. Atlas's name left a spark on my tongue that I ignored. It was easier considering the sparks that lingered on the top of my skin from flirting with my body against Dante's. I wasn't naive enough to not realize what I was doing.

"Alright, alright" Dante gave in and handed my drink back to me.

"Thank you kind sir" I took a sip.

"You're welcome my dear lady" he bowed slightly to me and I giggled again. I felt my cheeks flush hotter and I was starting to wonder if Dante was right and if I could even handle a fourth drink. The music switched from hip hop to EDM causing the strobes to flash quicker. EDM was so much easier to vibe too, all I had to do was jump up and down to the beats and feel the bass rush through my body. I quickly chugged the last half of my drink which made Dante raise an eyebrow at me in concern.

"What?" I questioned, "I didnt want to spill it. '' A small laugh on my lips. Dante sighed and shook his head.

"I guess you just want me to be your knight in shinning armor" he smiled joking back. We both let out a small laugh and started to feel the beat of the music around us. We started to jump up and down on our toes. Any song with words that came on the crowd screamed the lyrics sending waves of excitement around the room. I put my hands on Dante's shoulders and he grabbed my waist as we both jumped up and down, fists in the air. My heart raced as the crowd started to be in sync with the music. Trish and her dude guy thingy partied right next to us, her and I laughing as we bumped into each other. She waved and Atlas made his way through the crowd and joined the excitement. Soon we all were head banging to bass drops and screaming lyrics at the top of our lungs. My hair flew in front of my face and for a moment I thought I was going to be okay. I could still be around Atlas and wish for his happiness as my heart slowly healed from my crush on him. Trish, Atlas, myself and Dante all held hands jumping up and down like school children. As more people joined the dance floor it was almost impossible not to touch bodies together. Suddenly Atlas stopped jumping next to me and he quickly reached for his pocket.

"What's up man?" Dante yelled over the music. I saw Atlas pull his phone out of his pocket. His phone screen lit up and I could see a tan girl with strawberry blonde hair who was kissing Atlas on the cheek as they both beamed with happiness. The caller ID read "Natalie" with heart emojis on either side of her name. I watched as his eyes lit up.

"Sorry, be right back, Nat is calling!" He rushed past the crowd like a kid on Christmas as he went outside. A tear rolled down my cheek.

I wasn't okay…