How did you know that.....you are gay?

'I....moved in.....with him.....'

Nakul was clueless about how just in the past 3 weeks the impossible had happened. The one thing from which he tried running away from, he ended up chasing. It had been 3 weeks since he moved in with Dhiraj and time passed by too quickly for him to take a grasp of the changes around him.

Initially, Nakul was hesitant about how he would let Dhiraj know about his thoughts. But the man in front of him was patient as ever. Smiling with his eyes, he just sat with Nakul till he got over his awkwardness. And when Nakul did finally tell him that he wanted to move in, that smile reflected onto Dhiraj's lips.

~Badump

Nakul could feel that same sensation again as he saw Dhiraj making a lame attempt to hide his wide grin. He got anxious, not being able to decipher the reason for his heart pacing up. 'Maybe that's what it is, anxiety. Yes, I'm just anxious.' Nakul reached that conclusion of his self-diagnosis.

Nakul thought he would take some time to move out. But only 2 days later he found himself moving in with Dhiraj. Dhiraj had taken care of everything apparently. And although Nakul had abundant doubts about their co-habiting, they.....surprisingly blended in well together.

Nakul's doubt stemmed from the 4 conditions that he had set. Them being:

1. They both will maintain personal space and the other person won't invade it.

2. Nakul will be the person buying groceries.

This was mostly because Dhiraj denied taking the rent Nakul offered to pay and Nakul most definitely didn't want to freeload.

3. Nakul will also be in charge of cooking

And the last and the MOST IMPORTANT condition,

4. None of them will bring "people '' to the penthouse. As well as no throwing of any parties.

Nakul was sooooooooo sure that Dhiraj would break one of these conditions but unexpectedly, he didn't. In fact, Nakul realized that most of the assumptions and prejudice he held towards Dhiraj were in fact, not true. Dhiraj was.... surprisingly a somewhat straight-laced guy. As mentioned earlier, they seamlessly blended in well together.

Dhiraj usually woke up at 6am and he would be all ready at around 7:30 by the time Nakul would leave for school. Now although Nakul could just simply leave after preparing his own lunch box, he would prepare some extra for Dhiraj. They would then go their separate ways.

Nakul would come back from his school at 3 or so and would usually have the house of himself. He then took his afternoon nap, he loved soooooo much. By 7 in the evening Dhiraj would return too. And what he got to know from the old yet kind housekeeper lady in her 50s was that, it was only recently that Dhiraj came home early. Earlier, he won't be home even after 9. Hearing this, Nakul couldn't help but question, does he come back home early for me?

Same was the case for weekends. Under normal circumstances, Dhiraj would go to his office even on Sundays. But now that his baby was here, he simply loved spending time at home!! Their weekends were mostly laid back and relaxed.

Nakul would wake up much later than his usual time. Dhiraj would try to help Nakul with breakfast, mostly in an attempt to show off his "cool" side and impress his baby. But all his attempts would end up in him creating a mess. Apparently cooking was something that the-almighty-Dhiraj sucked at. But sometimes, his sloppiness would make Nakul giggle. So for Dhiraj, making-a-fool-of-himself so that Nakul would laugh more....wasn't a bad idea.

The weekend evenings had also turned into movie night for them!! Ever since Nakul was able to experience life in colors, he had become somewhat of a movie-addict. On most weekdays he would watch movies and TV series on his own with his laptop. But on weekends, came time when he saw movies in Dhiraj's mini theater. What also was an addition to the big screen and popcorn was Dhiraj's company. On weekends, they both watched movies together. It had become a routine. With all of these new experiences, Nakul didn't realize when 3 weeks had passed by.

But there was something that Nakul had taken notice of. Unlike what he had expected, Dhiraj didn't "pounce" on him at all. He did make cheesy, flirty remarks every now and then. But nothing as such, that would make him uncomfortable. He did have his guard up initially, but as more time passed by, he found himself getting relaxed around Dhiraj.

There was also this one time when he had fallen asleep on the couch while watching a movie. But found himself on his bed the next morning. Upon asking about this to Dhiraj, a proud Dhiraj told him that it was his absolute privilege for being able to carry Nakul in a full-on bride style way to his room. That wide grin of his returned and Nakul couldn't help but wonder: 'Is this the way he treats all the people he likes or am I getting a special treatment?'

Nakul's train of thoughts was interrupted as Dhiraj walked by him. Despites them getting along together, there was 1 thing that Nakul didn't like. It was Dhiraj's habit to walk around shirtless. 'Sure, it's his place so he can do whatever he wants, but why make others uncomfortable?'

Nakul couldn't help but compare his somewhat flabby stomach with Dhiraj's chiseled and well-toned muscles. His complex would only worsen every time he would see those damned muscles.

'How does he get the time to work out when he's working all the time?' Nakul thought as he pinched the extra fat he had on his tummy. Dhiraj took a bottle of water and sat beside Nakul. All Nakul could do was stare at him with envy. Dhiraj saw those gawking eyes and asked Nakul with a smug smile on his face,

"Like what you see?"

It was only then that Nakul realized he was staring at Dhiraj for too long in a not-so-subtle way. Rolling his eyes, Nakul made it seem as if he is the innocent one, but Dhiraj is framing him as the one having "naught" thoughts.

"What? People go crazy over it." Dhiraj replied to that eye roll with a smirk on his face.

"They sure must have a pathetic choice in men" Nakul snapped back.

Although harsh, Dhiraj didn't really mind it. By now he was fully aware about how his baby avoids and adverts anything that makes him embarrassed. Despite that, Dhiraj's heart would always go pitter-patter when Nakul threw a sarcastic remark at him while rolling his eyes. 'I'm definitely turning into a Masochist. But it isn't that bad of an experience', he always concluded after such remarks.

While Dhiraj was busy replaying little skits of him, a humble servant trying to please his Master Nakul in various ways, his baby was being bothered by a question. Nakul was previously plagued with it too. But he chose to bury it down. Especially because it seemed too personal of a question to ask Dhiraj.

Noticing his baby lost in some thought Dhiraj nudged him again.

"Hey?! What are you thinking about?"

Nakul stared at him. Hesitantly, not sure if he should ask the next question.

Dhiraj was now a bit worried due to Nakul's silence. "What's wrong?" He steps closer to Nakul focusing all of his attention on the man silently standing in front of him.

"Ah..." a hesitant Nakul began.

"Yes?"

"Actually.....I had...a question I wanted to....ask." Nakul said with a tone of uncertainty.

"What is it?"

"It might be a bit personal. You won't mind right? Like...you won't be mad right?"

His baby trying to ask him something personal? Dhiraj was everything but mad. He controlled his smile that was trying to seep out by pressing his lips real tight.

"Why would I mind? Just ask it....."

"Okay...but don't answer it if you don't feel comfortable. Okay?"

Now Dhiraj was a bit worried. What was it that Nakul was so hesitant to ask?

"Okay. Just ask it."

"So...how did you know that.....that like...." Nakul fumbled upon how he should present his question.

"Like.....?"

"Like....that.....you are...gay?" Nakul finally said it. Phew. He left a mental sigh. He expected Dhiraj to become uncomfortable but on the contrary, Dhiraj let out a small chuckle.

"What? That's what you wanted to ask?" Dhiraj questioned while chuckling more.

"Sorry. I just thought it might make you uncomfortable" a dejected Nakul replied. He was trying so hard to be considerate so as to not hurt Dhiraj's pride. But here he was being laughed at.

"Sorry...It's just that you made it seem like something so serious but..." Dhiraj laughed a bit more relieved.

"Sorry, for trying to be considerate. Apparently, I am the fool here." Nakul turns to leave.

"Stop.....stop-" Dhiraj was grateful for the fact that Nakul was finally interested in him, so he didn't want to miss even a single opportunity to get closer. "-I'll tell you."

Nakul halted, giving the man another chance. A second later Dhiraj began.

"Well, technically I'm not gay. I'm Bi. I've been with both men and women. And yeah.....I am attracted to both.

As far as: how did I know? I cannot really put it on a specific day. Although I do remember the 1st time I was attracted to a guy. It was a club. I was 17-"

"You were a minor and went to a club?" Nakul-the teacher popped out suddenly.

"I...come on....it wasn't a big deal. All kids do stuff that they shouldn't be doing. Don't make it seem like I'm the only one. Besides that's not what we are talking about-"

Nakul just kept staring at him, hands folded with an exaggeratedly disappointed look. Deep down he was just teasing Dhiraj, "tsk. And here I thought you would be a model student. So disappointing.....tsk....tsk...tsk..."

Dhiraj too realized Nakul was only trying to tease him, so he quickly jumped back to the original topic of discussion.

"I WAS a good student. Besides that, is not the point of discussion here. We are talking about my story here. And let me do that.....So yeah. I was in a club and there was this really....." Dhiraj pressed his lips, trying to find the right word. "- really gorgeous... sexy guy. He was older than me. 20-ish maybe. I saw him and there was nothing more captivating in this world than him. He had a slim-fit body type. And gorgeous hair and such beautiful eyes-"

'He said he likes me right? And he is praising another man in front of me?' Nakul couldn't help but question.

"-And the 1st time our eyes met, we just....instantly clicked. He approached me and yeah....we got into things....."

Nakul was just too stunned to say anything. It was because his thoughts were focused on other things.

"Wait!! So..... so you were 17.....a minor.....and he was 20.... An adult.... And he approached you?-" a visibly concerned Nakul questioned Dhiraj

"Yeah?!" Dhiraj wasn't able to understand what was wrong.

"Dude...you were taken advantage of!!!!!!!"

"No....we both knew what we were getting ourselves into"

"NOOOOOOOOO"

"Nakul..." a part of Dhiraj was grateful that Nakul showed at least some amount of concern for him. But he HAD to assure his baby that things just happened. There was nothing "serious". It was just what it was. A fling. A curiosity Dhiraj wanted to explore, "-trust me. It wasn't like that. It was just 2 horny teens and nothing more."

Nakul stared into Dhiraj's eyes. He knew.....he could let things go this one time." what happened after that?"

"After that.....I started finding guys attractive too. And I didn't mind it"

"How can you not mind it? Its LIKING THE SAME SEX we are talking about...."

"Yeah. I know. And yeah, usually things like these should affect you as a person a lot. But for me it's just...the way things are. If I like someone, I like them. Then even if they're the same gender, it doesn't matter to me..."

"How...?" Nakul was still unable to comprehend Dhiraj's point of view.

"I.....don't know. That's just the way I am" Dhiraj gave him a feeble smile. And looking at it, Nakul felt somewhat miserable. He knew Dhiraj was sincere. And he also wasn't able to ignore the fact that this man had expressed his feelings for Nakul time and again. And although Nakul now believed that Dhiraj was sincere, he couldn't understand how one man can be attracted to other.

That made him feel even more miserable. Because despite knowing that the man in front of him was ready to do anything for him, he won't be able to reciprocate Dhiraj's feelings.

"You know.....you know that I don't like men...." Nakul still had to make his stand clear.

"Yeah. You don't have to...."

"So I might not be able to reciprocate what you....feel for me....." Nakul said with his gaze averted, looking somewhat embarrassed.

"Yeah..." Dhiraj took a step closer to Nakul. Finally their eyes met. Dhiraj smiled with his eyes and with a soft voice replied, "You don't have to...."

'Not yet. Take your time. I'll make sure that you will fall for me.'

Dhiraj let out a smile at that thought. In an attempt to make lighten the grim air around them, Dhiraj caricaturishly asked Nakul,

"By the way, we still have 2 dates....I mean hangouts left right? Where should we go next?"

The subtle attempt to change the topic didn't go unnoticed by Nakul. How far can this man go? He was already so indebted to Dhiraj for giving him an experience of his life in the past month. He wanted to return it somehow. That was when he decided his next move.

"Yup. Let's hangout. This time, let me treat you" Nakul proposed.

* * *

Hello!! 

If you like my work please do leave a review!!

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~Thank u~

* * * 

Trivia:

In the initial chapters, Dhiraj presented a somewhat different narrative to Nakul. Like he had a confusing phase about his sexuality. And about that- He was lying.

Dhiraj's sexuality never really bothered him. That's just the way he is. He's a sort of person who doesn't really need anyone's validation in life. The same reflects in his sexuality too. He is fine with it because he never really gives a damn about what people will think about him or how they will view him.