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HP X LOTM : Please Call Me Mr. Error.

"When did I sign away my wealth to you!?" Lockhart asked, shocked. "That's the neat part about it, you don't know.", Loki said with a smile. "Hmm...I can feel it. I can feel the power coursing through my veins." Voldemort said as he felt his face after his rebirth. "Huh? Where's my nose!!!?" "Obviously, I have it! Do you want it? If you want it you need to praise Dumbledore!!" Loki said with an innocent smile. "Lord Voldemort does not need to listen to yo- Dumbledore is the greatest wizard of all time!!" Voldemort said with fanatic eyes, creating confusion amongst the death eaters. 'What!? Why am I saying this!? What did he do to me!?' "Who are you!??" Dumbledore asked calmly. "Me? Have I not introduced myself yet? Please call me Mr. Error." Loki said with a smile while adjusting the monocle over his right eye. Read more about Loki's adventures as he walks through his years at Hogwarts meeting and scamming an array of famous personalities that have become infamed in the world of Harry Potter. ********************************************************** Read 20 chapters ahead on my p@treon for $3 (USD) by going to the link, pa treon.com/hooin_kyoma_au . Remember to remove the space between 'a' and 't'.

Hooin_Kyoma · 書籍·文学
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308 Chs

Dominic Shacklebolt.

Stepping down the never-ending staircase, Loki wondered, 'Hmm…given this is an ancient castle, wouldn't all the plumbing end up in the great lake? And given how I'm in the dungeons which are closest to the lake, doesn't it mean that the dungeons are the closest to the shit?'

'Eww…is that why Professor Snape's hair is so greasy? 'Cause he takes a shower with shitty water?'

Bile shot up in Loki's mouth but he barely managed to hold back the food that followed.

Stepping into the common room, Loki laid his eyes on the extravagant decorations that the room had and felt like a royal.

'Beautiful.' Loki said looking out of the sealed window wall on the dungeon that had little lights around it to shine a little light into the dark black lake.

Loki could swear he saw a large eye peering at him through the darkness for a second, but he chalked it to his imagination due to his sleep-deprived state.

Walking into the common room, Loki froze when he saw what appeared to be a seventh-year student lying sleepily on the couch.

Attempting to tiptoe past the student was a failure since as soon as Loki stepped foot into the room he found the student waking up and looking right at him.

"Finally! You're here!" The student said.

"Who might you be?" Loki asked with a little worry.

"Dominic Shacklebolt." The student said with a smile on his face.

"Are you going to do something to me?" Loki asked a little warily.

"Well you are right to be worried, given how many students you turned to be against yourself during dinner. But I'm not here because of them. Well to be precise not here to help them."

"What are you here for then if you're not here to beat me up?"

"Well, I would love to beat you up too since you've created a divide between the purebloods, muggles and half-bloods in the house with such few words, but on the account that I'm a good person, I'm not going to do such a thing."

"That's what a bad person would say to make me believe they're good.", Loki said pulling his wand out to scare the student.

"Ha!? And what are you going to do? Fire sparks at me?"

"I kno-"

"Oh please! You're a first year, even if you've read all your books you know nothing. So shut it and listen while I'm being nice! I'm tired and I don't want to do this again."

"...ok."

"Good, firstly, welcome to Slytherin. And secondly, Professor Snape informed me to see that no one takes steps to hurt you directly or indirectly, so from tomorrow, you're leaving the common room with me and never coming back into it until it's night and you've finished your detention and need to sleep."

"...understood." Loki nodded, he knew his actions would have consequences but he didn't expect to have gotten off so light. "Won't they try and attack you?" Loki asked a question next.

"Not unless they want to go against the three-time under-seventeen world duelling champion.", Dominic said with a smirk on his face.

"Can you teach me!?" Loki instantly asked with sparkly eyes.

"Haha! I would've if it was my sixth year, unfortunately, I'm in my seventh and I have to study a lot and prepare for my NEWTs. So I'm sorry."

"Aww…that's sad you just went from a superstar to a nerd real quick."

"But I could give you my notes and study materials if you behave from now on." Dominic said with a smart smile.

"Alright, you're a good nerd." Loki nodded and then asked something else, "By the way, aren't you a pureblood too? Aren't you affected by my comments?"

"Eh..I don't take offence to it because I find most of it meaningless and I wouldn't have become the Head Boy if I was so biased against the rest of the student population in Hogwarts would I have?"

Loki's eyes sparkled so he immediately asked, "You're the head boy? Do I get special privileges since you're taking care of me?"

"Haha~! No don't expect me to be partial with you. Now off you go, you've got to get up early tomorrow to match my schedule. See you." Dominic said and began walking towards the men's dormitory but he paused and turned back. 

"Oh, and the men's dormitory is this way, while the women's is that way. Don't attempt to ever sneak in there, you'll get stung by quite the nasty curses and then the women will wake up while you're curling on the ground and screaming to curse you even more."

'Oddly specific, but ok.'

"How will I find my dormitory?"

"The door will have your nameplate on it." Dominic simply said and waved his hands as he walked away into the darkness of the dungeons.

With Dominic gone the common room had become empty and Loki collapsed onto a sofa.

Tracing his finger around the whistle on his wrist Loki pulled it up and blew into it, causing Sunny to appear in front of him exiting from the spirit world.

"You cute little fella, how are you!?" Loki asked squishing the chubby Niffler's cheeks.

*Squeak* *Squeak*

"Oh? You've gotten close to completing your potion digestion already?" Loki asked with surprise since he was still just fifty-one per cent of the way there.

Although the stunt at the train where he stole money from children had given him one extra per cent, it still was nowhere near completion.

"Then we need to get you your next potion ingredients so that you can have your next potion immediately once you're done with this one." Loki said with a smile, happy that he at lest had one little friend who would always have his back for him.

Loki examined the common room a little, observing the bust of Salazar Slytherin in the room and finding it a little ugly.

'Did they change the bust to make him look ugly?' Loki wondered. 'Since the higher the sequence the more charm a person has and given how they were the most powerful Witches and Wizards of their times, shouldn't the Hogwarts Founders look prettier?'

'And wasn't there a reason to believe physical forms of gods caused them to lose control? Is that why his face looks so deformed? Someone schemed to make him lose control and kill him?'

'Is he even dead?'

With the Niffler on his shoulder, Loki walked through the aisles and reached a door with a golden nameplate on it that read, 'LOKI'.

"Finally, a room to rest in for the day."

Walking into the room and shutting it behind himself, Loki found the emerald-themed room to his liking.

There was a luxurious bed, his trunk at its foot, a dresser and a bathroom attached to the room through a door.

The room felt just the right amount of grand and gave Loki a sense of peace that he'd been missing throughout the day.

Carefully checking that the door had been locked behind him, Loki pushed his trunk in front of it to make sure that no one would get in without waking him up.

'Although there might be protections that do not allow one person to enter another person's room, it's best that I take precautions and don't let myself become an easy target. Who knows what might happen otherwise.'

Pulling out the Two Way Mirror from his trunk, Loki looked at the sleeping Elane who was on its other end and whispered, "Goodnight Elane."

With one last look around the room that had been lit magically and was now darkening, Loki collapsed into the bed with the Niffler who was going to stay awake for a while and make sure to digest his potion further.

"Goodnight Sunny."

*Squeak*

And Loki was out like a light.

Thank's for reading, I hope you have a nice day!

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