The tournament ball pt1
-Harry Pov-
It's been a week and a couple of days since I hired Micheal Pierce, and currently, I am planning my theft of the Statue of Liberty that will take place later tonight, and in two days the ball will happen. I have already scoped out the place to see just how big it is and I have to say I'm happy with it. Now I'm just building my own statue. The statue of Harry Potter! It will take the place of the Statue of Liberty and it shall be glorious.
I was at first thinking of messing around and using the black pearl for this operation but then I might fuck everything up by showing magic to the world.
But hey then again do I really care?
I mean in 2012 the world will face the arrival of aliens. But, if I do bring the pearl there will be a huge cover-up, and my statue will be taken down before the public can see it.
Hmmm, what to do.
Ah, I got a great idea I can make a blood statue of Jack Sparrow and fly into the ball with the pearl. That should be perfect, In all honesty, making the wizarding world outraged and in an uproar is one of my guilty pleasures.
In the past week, my shop in knockturn alley has been a big hit. Not only do vampires have a reliable way to get the good blood but dark wizards sometimes find some cool things to buy. I have some manuals on Snapes spells there for a lot of Galleons and I claim they are made by me.
The funny thing is apparently Snape went in and tried to fight his way into the backroom because one wizard used the spell on a couple of Aurors he was running from and moody and Sirius recognized it. I heard through the grapevine Snape had to go through a lot of trouble explaining that he didn't tell anyone about it.
He then proceeded to try and fight his way into my shop but my main man Micheal activated the wards on him.
He should have known not to try when moody of all people doesn't come near my shop. Those idiot Aurors tried several times to do an inspection when Fudge told them to leave the shop alone. Yeah, those Aurors got ejected from my shop and into the fangs of some pissed vampires.
I'm still mad about them finding out about my business so early but there is nothing I can do about it.
Checking over the huge ass statue I made of myself I chuckled a bit, the statue was stone transfigured and alchemized into gold. I used the full metal alchemy instead of the wizarding world version. And my wands were spread wide like I was greeting the world. I also had a crown on my head. Everything else looked exactly like me, it was magnificent!
Smiling with satisfaction I stuffed the statue into my inventory and left Britain with a portkey. I landed in the American magical community version of TSA. My identity this time around was Daniel Radcliff. Super original if I do say so myself.
From there I left the magical area and headed toward the statue of liberty. After a couple of apparitions, I reached the base of the statue of liberty. I must admit it is a beautiful piece of work only second to my statue.
I carefully began to use cutting charms to separate the statue from the stone base it stood proudly atop.
Once it was cleanly off I then put it into my inventory, it's just too easy the inventory really is unfair I don't understand why some people would still use garages and stuff if they could stuff anything into an alternate space.
I then took out my statue and placed it where lady liberty once stood, I then began to place some sticking charms and some compulsion charms that would last a couple of days. The compulsion charm will make anyone that sees it want to immediately take a picture of it.
I then placed another requirement compulsion charm that will only go into effect if someone wants to take down the statue. They instead will think it is the coolest thing ever.
I hopped off the base of my new statue and took a couple of steps back, It looked glorious! I then took a shit tone of photos and proceeded to portkey to Diagon alley and from there I headed straight to the headquarters of the daily prophet.
Using my fake credentials I easily got in and from there it was a piece of cake, my trustworthy vibe helped a lot as I weaved my way through the Daily Prophet office. Now I just need a distraction.
I saw Rita Skeeter writing away and an evil smile crept up on my face.
I wandlessly put her in an illusion, said illusion was much like the reality she was in but with a little twist.
-narrator pov, ritas illusion-
Rita Skeeter was typing away when her boss came up to her looking furious.
"You are an unregistered Animagus! You are fired, Skeeter I don't need the bad press from you any longer!" her boss yelled furiously
Rita paused for a second before saying, "boss! What do you mean I'm not an unregistered Animagus!"
"Yes, you are! You fucking disgusting beetle! Get out!" he snapped back and pointed at the door
The next thing that happened is a common workplace occurrence when someone gets fired like this. She lashed out leaving nothing on the table.
"Huh! So what if I am a beetle animagus! What are you going to do you fat pig! I will ruin you! You will regret ever firing me! You fat insufferable limp dicked little man!" Rita screamed in anger
Someone chuckled softly hearing what she said.
Rita's head snapped in their direction and she yelled, "what are you laughing at! You slut! Your cunt had been ran through more times than platform nine and three quarters!"
Just then the illusion broke. And standing in front of her was the boss's daughter. His twelve-year-old daughter.
-Harry pov -
The prophet turned into chaos as the boss's daughter started to break down crying. The boss looked pissed and Rita was trying to explain everything. No one saw me slip into the editor and printing section of the prophet, I began to change the whole article that was being sent out tomorrow. And no one will realize before it's too late.
After I finished typing my article and making sure everything is set I left swiftly.
[the next day]
I woke up in an amazing mood, I swiftly got dressed and brushed my teeth.
I said good morning to the portraits and began to devour my breakfast.
Soon Hedwig flew in with the Prophet. Looking at the headline a large smile spread across my face.
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HARRY POTTER KING OF AMERICA?
-The great Harry Potter yesterday night stole the statue of liberty from the Americans and put in its place his own statue! If some of you daft morons are confused and don't know what the statue of liberty is then learn more about the world you live in you fucking knob heads. I say we reward the brilliant Harry Potter for his bravery. #TenPointsToGryffindor #DumbledoresABitch. Also in the news, Rita Seeker admits to being an unregistered Beatle Animagus and then calls her boss a "fat pig" and his twelve-year-old daughter, a "slut whose cunt has been ran through more times than platform nine and three quarters,". In other important news, Harry Potter's grand tournament ball is tomorrow I can't wait to see what he wears!
-Amazing article was written by Harry Potter
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Ah, I'm so good with words. The hashtags were perfect too.
-Sirius black pov --
"HAHAHAHAH! Cissy come and read this paper!" I barked in laughter
"Fine what has that boy done now?" Cissy asked in exasperation
She snatched up the paper and began to read it I could see her lips slowly tugging up into a smile.
Harry is a true marauder! Well, almost he still needs to catch a couple of fair ladies~
-Narrator pov -
Everyone had varying reactions to the morning's paper, Dumbledore looked less than pleased being called a bitch out of nowhere.
And Ron still looked slightly dead in the eyes, he still hasn't found himself a date to the gala. And the main reason is.... He can't look at human girls the same anymore. His taste have changed to a more exotic brand.
The American ministry was in an uproar because the American government was pushing the blame on them for not protecting such an important monument.
Nick Fury went to the statue to try and tear it down but right as he got close he whipped out his phone and snapped a photo of it, "shit that's dope." he said out of nowhere
Shaking his head Fury cursed out loud, "motherfucker It's charmed!"
[the next day]
Inside the tournament stadium, a room was expansion charmed and decorated to look like a fancy ballroom. There were amazing tables and even better food to be served.
The majority of people started to arrive when the black pearl started to descend from the sky. There were a lot of murmurs and whispers going around immediately. Who wouldn't everyone knew Captain Jack Sparrow was the one who stole the ship along with Harry Potter. Some Durmstrang graduates and current students were cursing up a storm in German.
Captain Jack Sparrow jumped off the ship double-fisting bottles of rum and began to do his signature drunken walk toward the stadium.
Just when he was about to enter the ballroom he saw Amelia Bones with her niece.
Strutting over he smiled and said, "Amelia you look ravishing tonight! Fancy a bottle of rum!"
She looked at her niece and then back to him, "No I don't, and Sparrow you are lucky we can't arrest you here."
Smiling he replied, "Captain Jack Sparrow,"
"What?" Amelia replied
"My name is Captain Jack Sparrow savvy?"
"*giggle* but you don't have a crew!" Susan Bones Amelia's niece spoke up
Looking down Jack grinned before squatting down to her level, "I'm currently in the market, do you fancy being on the crew of thee, Captain Jack Sparrow? You will get the set sail on my ship the black pearl!"
"No! She doesn't want to be on your crew! Now if you will excuse us," Amelia butted in before dragging Susan away
As they left Jack heard Susan say, "But Aunty I wanted to join!"
Jack smiled broadly and continued to make his way into the ball.
Soon everyone arrived but the contestants, Harry then stood in the center of the room and began to announce the attendees.
"Welcome everyone to the tournament ball! I hope you have all been enjoying yourself! I see you over there Captain Jack!" that earned him a few chuckles
Harry continued, "Now I will be announcing the arrival of our contestants, First we have Albus Dumbledore with his date MERLIN'S BALLS HAHAHA with his date Severus Snape!"
Dumbledore and Snape walked together, and Albus looked happy but Snape looked ready for murder. His scowl was so deep it looked like it was carved onto his face.
The few chuckles that sounded when he and Albus were announced certainly didn't help.
"Next we have Ron Weasley and Hermoine Granger!" a flew claps were heard
Much like with Albus and Snape it was clear that these two didn't want to go with each other.
"Now, please welcome Cornelius Fudge with oh my Alcina Dimitrescu!" Harry announced and Fudge strutted In with Alcina like he was the man
Loud applause broke out for the two, even if she was a vampire the Dimitrescu Vampire family is extremely famous and well known. So the wizards didn't dare to not applaud.
-Harry pov -
"Next we have Tom Riddle with Bellatrix Lestrange!" the two walked in and the room was dead silent
I heard Sirius cough, "snake face and crazy bitch."
Both obviously heard him and glared daggers in his direction.
"Finally we have Gellert Grindelwald and holy mother of magic her majesty Queen Elizabeth II!" a defining silence ensued then a loud very loud applause broke out it was almost defining
I could see Dumbledore's eyes comically widen.
Voldemort looked like he was hit with a crucio.
Fudge looked giddy
Ron looked like he just wanted to shag a troll.
And I, well I couldn't believe my eyes because for someone in her sixties in this period she should look old but she didn't, she looked young! And Gellert looked quite young himself.
-End-
A/N: Hahaha I bet no one expected Gellert's date! Queen Elizabeth is a witch! That has to explain how she is still kicking.... And she and Gellert seem to have a history. Oooo~ and to those people who immediately thought 'they would never be close because gellert wishes to remove muggles from power.' I just ask for you to wait.
There was literally no plausible way for Ron to bring a troll. And this isn't me trying to shove Hermione into the story, she logically was the only choice.
And thank you NoobLad for the idea of the statue although I didn't make it Jack Sparrows it was a good idea.
I love seeing all of your suggestions and I try to keep track of who suggested what but sometimes I see a suggestion and like it but lose who comments it so if you see I use one of your suggestions just know I thank you very much for it!