CHAPTER 30

Well, that's awkward, but because of respect, I didn't want it to feel that way.

"Oh, hi. You want to come in?", I asked.

"Uh, no, no. I was actually, err, waiting for you.", he said, stammering, scratching his head and smiling nervously, "I'm sorry, did I shock you?", he asked.

"Kind of, yeah.".

"I apologize. I didn't mean to.",

"It's alright. Did you need something?", I asked, knowing pretty well what he was going to say.

"I-I-I don't know how to say this but you're absolutely glowing.",

"What?", I scoffed.

"I don't mean to sound like a pervert, I'm not. It's just out of pure honesty, and you deserve to know it too. I don't want anything from you, really. So don't feel pressured.".

If I say I was surprised, I'd be lying. I was more than surprised. I was too dumbfounded to speak. I had to excuse myself and leave the setting before it got any weirder. Sweet compliment though, I'd give him that.

When the celebrations ended and everyone was leaving, I felt a hand on my back. When I turned around it was him, smiling.

"It was good to see you, Jenara.", he said. His wife and some other people were standing with him, and nobody thought it was weird. It made me wonder, for a millionth time that day; Is this the American way? I guess it's not even a tiny deal for him to put his hand on my back like that. I guess I was the only one being weird, right?

…

When we got back home and Maria went ahead to shower, I took that time to investigate. It was just me and Jonthan in the living room and I did believe that he knew his in-laws enough to answer my questions.

"Hey, tell me about Maria's mom and dad.", I said.

"Why?",

"I'm just curious.".

"I don't know what you want to know, but maybe this might be enough. They were supposed to get divorced when Maria was 20.", he said.

"Mh, why?".

"Apparently they fell out of love, and it became too much for them.".

"Why didn't they do it then?".

"Two reasons; Financial and religious. Financial because divorce is expensive especially for a couple who's been married for quite some time. Dividing assets and all was not a picnic.".

"And religious?",

"Roman Catholics don't have divorce. It has annulments. When Maria's grandma divorced her husband, as a Catholic, it was a huge issue and the whole family and society ended up abandoning her because of that. It was that fear of abandonment that made Maria's mom decide to just stay in a loveless marriage.".

I did understand why she made that decision, but it also made me think; Life is too short to lock yourself in an unhappy marriage. Love is the most beautiful thing in the world, and sharing your bed with a man who doesn't love you like that is torture. I did get the fact that they both fell out of love, which meant she also didn't love him intimately, but well, no judgment here. I'd just hate to be in her situation. 

I somehow came to a revelation that our parents were the last generation to be that sacrificial, enduring a painful marriage for the sake of their children. But it is said, children of divorced parents grow up better than children of married parents who were supposed to be divorced but decided to stay married. If you know what I mean.

Nobody in their family knew of the divorce and all the ugly fights. It was just them and their children. Which meant what everyone saw during that Christmas celebration and possibly more celebrations before, was an act, trying to make people think that they're a strong couple in love, but as soon as everybody leaves, they sleep in different bedrooms. It's sad. I really felt bad for Maria's mom. But I felt worse because of that mini conversation I had with her husband earlier that evening. I felt like a bad person, I don't know why.

***