The Bigger They Are
{Because the only time you need to worry about a soldier is when they don’t have anything to bitch about. As long as they’re griping about something, they’re doing just fine.}
“Well, then I guess I’m doing just fine, because this shit fucking sucks, Pontiac.”
{Suck it up, soldier boy. You’ve got a big one coming your way,} Pontiac countered, then highlighted a large heat source that was on the move in their direction.
Corporal Cuervo whistled, then sighed, “That thing’s the size of an apartment building, Pontiac. ETA?”
{Faster than you can run. I’d give you the numbers, but it’d just make you cry.}
“You know I can factory reset you, right?”
{Psh. As if you’d do something like that. I’m amazing,} Pontiac bragged.
“Right, right, right, you’re the best. Options?”
{Don’t get stepped on and do your best to leave a pretty corpse? It’s bigger than you, probably stronger than you, and my scans show that its skin is way thicker than yours.}