Chapter 19: 26 Years Old

Advanced chapters on P@treon.com/Rentakun.

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The cries of birds echoed through the forest as treetops trembled and every creature within a hundred-mile radius fled in a desperate attempt to escape the imminent collision. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched as small fires ignited on the surrounding trees, the sap within them bubbling and hissing from the intense heat. A silent agreement passed between Blast and me. Thirty seconds later, with remarkable synchronization, the trees exploded in a blaze of fire and splintered wood. I stepped forward. Our battle had begun.

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**A Couple of Weeks After a Seriously Good Fight**

"Pass the potatoes, dear," my mother said, her voice calm yet expectant. I complied, sliding the bowl across the table with a flick of my wrist, earning a disapproving look from her for my laziness. We were having a family gathering for no apparent reason—unless, of course, it was someone's birthday and I had simply forgotten.

I glanced around at the extended family, searching for any signs of celebration that might suggest a birthday, but everyone met my gaze with neutral expressions. A sudden realization dawned on me: *Could it be my birthday?*

*No, that's not right,* I reassured myself. *My birthday's in June... Wait, what's the date?* I tried to mentally recalculate from the last time I'd bothered to look at a calendar. *It was still May last time I checked,* I thought with a bit of relief. *Wait—that was eighteen days ago. Damn, it's June now.*

My face tightened as I saw my younger sister approach the table carrying a two-story cake. *For God's sake,* I thought, *I can see the future. How did I not see this coming?* In front of me, the cake was placed, and 26 candles were lit.

"Happy Birthday to you…" The chorus began, and I put on that awkward smile everyone who's ever been the subject of a birthday party knows all too well. Twenty-six years old, and my family still insisted on this yearly ritual. Not to mention, there was at least one other birthday every month, and I was always 'encouraged' to attend—though I rarely did.

I nodded along to the off-key singing, blew out the candles, and gave the customary nod when urged to make a wish. I partook in the final ritual, cutting the cake before taking a slice, which signaled to everyone else that they could dig in.

The cake was... average at best, and I found myself wondering if my special diet had ruined normal food for me. Still, birthday cake never tasted amazing. It's generally served at kids' birthdays, and anyone who's spent time around children knows they have no taste.

The congratulations came thick and fast, and once again, I lamented having such a large family in this life. My inner introvert longed to crawl into a hole and turn off the lights. I felt more mentally drained in half an hour of small talk than in several battles where my life was on the line. Tired, I eventually managed to sneak away and collapsed on the couch next to my Uncle Duke, who was quietly watching the news. He glanced up, nodded at me in acknowledgment, and returned to his program. We sat in silence for a few minutes, the television droning on in the background as I drifted off into a light doze.

"Hey, that monster on the TV," my uncle suddenly said, interrupting my thoughts. "Are you going to deal with it?"

"Contrary to what people think," I replied, opening my eyes, "I don't hunt down every monster that appears. Only if the—" I stopped mid-sentence. The monster on the screen was one I had seen before. A grin spread across my face as I recognized the overgrown humanoid crab creature rampaging through the streets, wearing only white briefs with drawn-on nipples.

"I'm heading out," I announced, standing up from the couch. "Save a piece of cake for me," I added, knowing it was a futile request. As I made my way toward the front door, I murmured hurried excuses to those who tried to speak to me, feeling my anticipation build. I gently rebuffed attempts to engage me in conversation and swiftly extricated myself from the pit that was any family reunion I'd ever attended.

Not even a second after closing the door, I leapt off the ledge, gaining some distance before kicking off the air and breaking through the sound barrier without even a hint of a sonic boom. Once I had crossed that threshold, I accelerated toward Z-City, surpassing hypersonic speeds as I hurtled toward the creature's last known location. In less than ten minutes, I arrived at the city and came to a stop mid-air, summoning Life Fibers to patch up my scorched and torn clothes, which had failed to withstand the friction, leaving them with a distinctly reddish hue.

*Office block, park, restaurants, shelter,* I mentally listed, scanning the city below as I tried to pinpoint the monster's location. *Wait,* I thought, my eyes catching on a specific building. It was Bang's dojo. I hadn't seen the old man since he'd kicked my butt nearly twenty years ago. Maybe it was time to pay him a visit and see what I could learn from a true martial arts master.

Even as I considered this, I continued my search and quickly spotted an area of disturbance—overturned cars, a few bodies, crushed concrete, and glass, all signs of recent destruction. I landed gently on the ground and jogged through the eerily quiet streets, noticing a few heads poking out of shop windows as I passed. A few people beckoned me inside, and one young adult recognized me, cheering as I jogged by.

A few seconds later, I came upon a gruesome sight. The aforementioned crab monster stood before me—or at least its bottom half did. The top half was splattered everywhere, leaving the whole scene looking like a crab buffet gone horribly wrong. I didn't need a degree in ballistics to know what had happened, and a grin spread across my face as I realized the implications. The Mysterious Being had been obliterated, its entire upper half vaporized in an instant by a single cataclysmic blow. The realization that I had thoroughly messed up the timeline dawned on me as slowly and inevitably as the rising sun.

"It's King!" someone suddenly shouted, and I heard the patter of feet and the sound of doors slamming open as people rushed toward me, thankfully keeping a respectful distance as they cheered. A few asked for my autograph, and more than a few cameras flashed.

"Oh crap, did I steal the credit?" I mumbled to myself. I briefly considered pointing out the real victor, but the monster was such a minor threat in the first place, and honestly, I just really hate talking to crowds. It always turns into a contest of who can talk louder, and no one ever listens. After a few failed attempts at clarifying the situation, I gave up and walked away. I didn't see the kid with the soccer ball, but then again, this didn't seem like the same place where the crab monster had been killed last time. I nervously wondered if I had accidentally erased the formation of the Hero Association.

Shaking off my pursuers, I ducked into a side street and changed my appearance, slipping out as a new man—shorter, more unobtrusive, with black hair, brown eyes, and a hunched-over posture. No one would associate this man with King. I entered the nearest clothing shop, a small family-run business, quickly changed clothes, left the money on the counter, and exited as a completely different person.

So, judging from what I'd seen earlier, Saitama had already started his hero training and acquired at least some of his titular strength. I briefly wondered if this was all my fault or if I had started off in an alternate universe. The easiest way to find out was to check on a canon character, and the closest one was Bang. In fact, I could see his dojo from my current location, or at least the mountain on which it was perched, along with the hundreds of stairs leading up to it.

I bought two meat skewers from a nearby shop and ate them as I took a leisurely stroll toward the dojo. I was in no hurry to return to the family gathering, so I took my time, savoring the food as I ascended the hundreds of steps. I finished the skewers and pulled out some snake fillet from my inventory. The rich, crispy meat from the defeated Mysterious Being was far more savory than anything I'd eaten since returning to the supercontinent. I was still in the process of transforming one of my Instant Dungeons into a Gourmet World. I had already trapped many of the creatures from the Abandoned World and infused some of them with my own Gourmet Cells. I hoped they would soon multiply and become the dominant, yet tasty, force in that particular Instant Dungeon.