Chpater 6

Rai's heart skipped a beat. This was the first time he had set eyes on Kota since the day he made those rules. If he counted right, it was exactly a week. Of course, he had tried to see him but Kota never left his room. Sometimes, if he listened well in the middle of the night, he would hear Kota crying.

Kota's health and state of mind worried him greatly. "Kota..."

Kota held up a hand to silence him, eyes dead set on Kosuke. "Of course, you can't tell your parents. You don't love Yuri"

"Who the fuck are you!" Kosuke yelled, angry that someone had been eavesdropping and dared to even butt in.

Kota gave a cold laugh. "Who I am doesn't matter. What fucking matters is how you don't love Yuri enough to give him what he wants. What matters is how much of a fucking coward you are and how you're willing to live a lie to save your own stupid ass".

He paused, took a swig from the bottle and glared harder at Kosuke who was slowly going pale. "If I were you, I'd drop that life in a heartbeat, get some job and make the one I love happy but you're not like me. You're a fucking user. Just like everyone else. I bet you're leading the poor boy on. Using him for your own selfish needs and amusement and when you're tired, you'll fucking dump him and marry that chic your fucking parents picked for you"

They were all shocked.

"Kota" Rai started.

"Shut the fuck up!" He snapped at Rai, switching his icy glare to him. "You call yourself his friend and you're letting him do this. You're all assholes. Fucking fakes!"

"Kota, it's not like that. Kosuke would never hurt Yuri. He loves him"

"And yet he did hurt him didn't he?" Kota asked. "Lying to him for fucking years! In fact, he lied to all of you. If he still has any good conscience left, he'll leave Yuri alone and do what he really wants. To marry the fucking perfect girl!"

Kosuke was crying uncontrollably and Haru couldn't bear it so he moved down and hugged him. "Stop it," He said. "You don't even know him. You have no right to say such things. He's not using Yuri"

Kota scoffed. "You're all fucking blind. Better open your fucking eyes and see the truth. All he cares about is himself"

Rai couldn't take it anymore. "That's enough. Let's go upstairs" he said as he stood up and walked towards Kota but Kota pushed him away as soon as he touched him.

"Don't fucking touch me!" He yelled, staggering a bit. His eyes seemed unfocused and his words were more slurred. "Don't lay a fucking hand on me!"

Rai wasn't deterred. He advanced again but Kota pushed him and in the process, the bottle of wine slipped and crashed on the floor, smashing into a million pieces, red liquid staining the tiles. The crash seemed to bring him back to his senses. He looked at the people around him in horror and the shattered glass then ran away.

"That guy's got some major issues," Yami said, looking concerned. "Is he the Kota?"

Rai nodded. "He's been going through a lot. It's kinda like what Kosuke is doing to Yuri. I guess that's what triggered him"

Yami nodded in understanding. "I have to admit that some things he said were true though. Anyway, we'll take care of Kosuke and see ourselves out. You should go to him. He needs you now"

'If only he'd let me help' Rai thought but nodded then looked at the mess on the floor. He'd take care of it once he was sure that Kota was okay.

He got to Kota's door which was wide open. Something that has never happened since he moved in. Was it an indication that he wanted Rai to follow or was it a mistake?

He pushed it further. "Kota?"

No answer.

He stepped in and his nose was assaulted with the putrid stench of alcohol, cigarettes and puke. The room was a total mess. Clothes were strung everywhere. On the bed, the table, the floor. In fact, there wasn't a single clothless spot. There were also alcohol stains on some while some had dried vomit. Cigarette ashes and stubs were scattered almost everywhere. It was a complete utter mess.

The sound of retching suddenly broke Rai from his shock and he ran to the bathroom. There, hunched over the toilet seat, he found Kota crying and puking. Hot tears pooled in his eyes. His heart hurt seeing Kota like that. The Kota that was once full of joy. His world was filled with rainbows and bubbles but now, it just seemed like an endless dark void.

Kota heaved and heaved. Nothing came out but saliva. Rai felt that was enough. He picked him up and helped him take off the robe. He was surprised that Kota didn't struggle.

Kota remained calm and watched as Rai stripped off his robe. The cold air assaulted his skin and he shivered. Rai noticed and immediately wrapped him in his arms. Again, Rai thought Kota would struggle but to his surprise, Kota's body relaxed and he closed his eyes, savouring the warmth. He sighed. When last did he get hugged like this?

Rai was gentle, his scent pure and calming, like the sandalwood and the cool breeze of the sea. His body was firm, his arms strong, and secure and Kota felt safe wrapped within the cocoon of strong muscles. He suddenly felt like he could sleep forever. Tears came to his eyes and he let them fall. They slid down his cheeks to Rai's shoulder, wetting his shirt. Rai didn't kind. He even snaked a hand to the back of Kota's neck and rubbed it, silently urging him to let it out.

Kota sobbed on his shoulder. When did he become so pathetic? All because of one guy he gave his heart to. People lied to him when they said love is beautiful. It brought nothing but heartache and pain. Misery and self-hatred. 'Why Shun? Why did you betray me like that?'

Slowly, he felt Rai's fingers in his hair, softly stroking. His breathing was calm and Kota found himself listening to him breathe and soon enough syncing his own breaths with Rai's. At that point, Kota knew that he had never felt so calm in a long time.

"Kota" Rai called after a while.

"Hmm?"

"I'm going to move now," he said.

'No! No! Please stay!' Kota screamed in his mind but nodded meekly.