Remember

"Was it worth it? To discard all you strived to protect in your obsession for power?" An elderly man calmly spoke as he stood on the peak across from the white haired man who's back was turned.

The white haired man turned his red eyes towards the elder. "I won't know, until the day I see the answer with my own eyes. I will continue to climb, even if it's on a mountain of corpses." he spoke with conviction.

The elder opened his eyes and flashed his heavenly gaze. His vision could illuminate all the truths and concepts of the universe. "Do you truly believe you can stop the inevitable?" he questioned as his old form trembled in disbelief.

The man's red eyes bursted with resplendent light as he matched the elder's gaze. "Perhaps not, but I have already steadied my dao heart. Even in the face of the end, I will go all out." His dominating will flared out and shook the firmaments. The two drew their blades with a heavy heart, this would be the last time they would speak to one another.

Hessian opened his eyes as he found himself in the infirmary. He released a tired sigh as his eyes had lost their former light.

∞

"Captain! twelve more injured have just arrived! We're running out of available beds." The relief team's leader reported as Unohana examined their outer wounds.

"Then we'll treat them outside if needed." she spoke before moving to another patient.

It had been the day after the Zanpakuto Rebellion began. The injured were still being found underneath rubble caused by the destructive abilities of the sword spirits. Of course, the medical squad had been completely busy since the attacks ended. Spirits were low as many soul reapers felt distraught at the fact that they were betrayed by their own weapons.

"How long are you going to lounge around here? There are others who are in need of beds you know." Captain Unohana spoke as she stared at the young magician who still hadn't left his bed.

Hessian was already healed, but he had been blankly gazing out the window the entire time he was here. He was unusually quiet, and was in deep thought for the majority of the time.

"Captain Hessian, I think it would be best if you were to go somewhere else to clear your mind. We unfortunately do not specialize in mental healing here."

"Right.. my bad." Hessian finally responded quietly as he stood up to leave.

"Perhaps it is insensitive of me to say, however that expression on your face is truly depressing me. You're even depressing some of the others who look up to you." she bluntly said

Hessian glanced at her for a moment to retort, but nothing came out of his mouth. In the end he simply settled with saying "Thanks for the concern." he said before leaving to wander.

∞

FLASHBACK

Pages exploded in the air as they were cut down before they could release their memories. Hessian continued to run within the forest, he was moving at incredible speeds yet his pursuer was still catching up to him. Realizing that he couldn't outrun his opponent despite running at super-speed, he slid to a stop and focused on his hand.

A blade with the conceptual ability to cut through everything appeared in his grip. He swung straight to meet Nanashi head on. Nanashi narrowed his eyes as his sword hymns resonated through space. With a flash of resplendent light in his eyes, he cleaved straight through the magical sword. Hessian widened his eyes as Nanashi was capable of cutting through his conceptual super sword. Pages dispersed from the magician's belt as he created distance.

Nanashi ignored the explosions and continued his charge towards his former master. In his panic, Hessian opened up a portal towards another reality. He immediately closed the portal and released a breath of relief. However he froze when he heard the sound he had heard all too often in the past. The sound of Nanashi cleaving his way through anything he cut.

"Since when the fuck can you do that!?" Hessian cried out in disbelief as Nanashi literally cut his way back to the current reality.

Nanashi stood stoicly as he stared down his former master. The cut in reality automatically fixed itself behind him. "Why are you denying the truth?" was the first words that came out of his mouth.

"The fuck do you mean?" Hessian asked incredulously

Nanashi narrowed his eyes. "You cannot feign ignorance forever." he swung his blade vertically as everything in his path split in half. Hessian didn't move as the attack was merely a warning.

"You remember what we were. Why are you unable to accept it?" he questioned more fiercely this time.

"Remember?" Hessian spoke a bit annoyed before bursting out in laughter. "So what if I do!?" He actually scowled.

"You've stopped climbing." Nanashi stated

"It's always climbing with you! WHAT DID CLIMBING EVER DO FOR US!? NOTHING!" Hessian roared uncharacteristically as he raised his hand.

A resplendent blade of light towered above him in his rage. With a furious swing, the blade descended towards his opponent. Nanashi watched with an unperturbed expression. Disappointment was all that his eyes displayed. With a single horizontal swing, the collosal blade shattered to pieces and Hessian found himself on the ground with his chest slashed open.

"Your dao heart reflects in your fragile blade." Nanashi stated "I have always been listening, ever since you remembered. Your resolve has wavered." he stared down at Hessian who was roughly breathing.

"I am Hessian Aversis von Schweinorg, and I am going to keep doing things." Nanashi quoted as Hessian avoided his gaze. "Since you've remembered, you've stopped 'doing things' for the sake of it. You've stopped climbing, you 'do things' simply to distract you from facing the past."

"Merely a coward who cannot face the truth."

Something within Hessian snapped as he met Nanashi's gaze.

"And you're merely the remnant of a failure!" Hessian growled out.

Nanashi didn't react to his words. Only continuing to gaze at him for another moment until turning around. "I said that I would make sure you reached the peak. I will wait until you are ready to face the truth, no matter how long I must wait." The sword spirit disappeared.

∞

Hessian POV

It doesn't look the same. This ocean, this mountain, this world. It all feels so depressing now.

"What the hell is wrong with me." I asked out loud as I stared at my reflection in the water. For a brief moment, it looked like blood.

I turned to the Mountain, for a moment I couldn't help but see it as a pile of corpses. My breath became a bit ragged as my emotions were in turmoil. My emotions, I haven't felt such strong emotions in a long time. Why is this the only thing I can't be nonchalant about? Why do I care so much about this!?

"Hey Hessian? Are you alright?" I turned to Sylph who seemed to be concerned.

"Yeah, sorry about that." I steadied my mind.

"Are you sad about Nanashi too? Gnomy has been really depressed about it lately." Sylph said sadly.

I moved to the peak to see Gnome facing a wall. She didn't look much different, but she was sort of radiating depression. "She's been like this since Nanashi left." Undine informed me from the pond.

I sighed out loud and made my way over to the little earth spirit. I stroked her head a little to get her attention. "He'll be back, I'll make sure of it." I promised as I prepared to get my shit together.

Maybe I need a therapist.