19. Chapter 19

Maya doesn’t think she’s going to have a good time at Addison’s party but she’s going for two reasons. One, she wants to spend time with Carina; and two, Addison is Carina’s friend. Now that she is Carina’s girlfriend, Maya thinks she needs to put some effort into getting to know the people in Carina’s life. And also, because Addison has an outdoor pool and it’s finally warm enough to use; and she can’t wait to see Carina in a swimsuit.

Maya is sitting in a chair near the pool as Carina is getting them some waters. She sees Carina take a detour to chat with Addison before coming back.

Someone sits down on the chair to Maya’s right; the one Carina is supposed to be sitting in. She sees Jack Gibson sitting there out of the corner of her eye.

“Hey, girl.” He says to get Maya’s attention.

She turns her head and narrows her eyes at him. Who does he think he is ‘hey girling’ her.

“Woah, woah, woah. Don’t go shooting daggers at me, I didn’t even do anything. Yet.” She raises his hands in innocence.

Carina sees this interaction beginning to take place and is curious to see where it is going to go.

“How was your race today?” Jack asks.

“What?”

“You run.” Jack mimes running by pumping his arms back and forth. “On the track.”

“Yes, I know.” Maya has no idea what this kid wants. She’s only ever seen him as the dumb quarterback of the football team.

He shrugs. “So? How’d it go?”

“Well, I won my race.” Maya takes a drink of her soda.

“Great.” He claps Maya on the shoulder. “Good for you. Next is Sectionals, right?”

“Yeah, next weekend.” Maya says, getting a hang of the conversation. It’s easy for her to talk about running and track. “I’m hoping to get past next weekend.”

“The ultimate goal.” He nods.

Maya shakes her head. “The ultimate goal is to one day get to the Olympics.”

“No way. That’s so cool. I wish I was good enough to get to the Olympics or like the Superbowl or World Series. That’s crazy.” He looks at her in disbelief.

Andy hurries over to Carina’s side. “Your girlfriend is hitting on my boyfriend. Make it stop.”

“No, she’s not. And no, I won’t. I want to see what happens here.” Carina casually tips back her bottle of cream soda.

“You know, Maya and I used to be good friends.” Andy mumbles, feeling jealous.

“What happened?”

“We got competitive about everything. Every sport, every class, everything. It drove us apart. Eventually I chose volleyball, and she chose running. It kind of put an end to the competitiveness, but then we weren’t close anymore either.”

“You could talk to her, you know.” Carina raises an eyebrow.

Andy scoffs. “And what, accuse her of hitting on my boyfriend.”

“If anything, I think Jack would be the one hitting on or flirting with Maya.” Carina smirks.

Andy rolls her eyes. Carina is probably right.

Jack points over to where Dean is standing at the end of the pool. “My boy Dean over there is looking for a lady.”

“Oh, dear.” Maya runs her hand over her face. “Sorry, I’m not interested.”

Jack snaps his fingers. “Damn. Well, I tried.” He looks down the length of the pool at Dean and runs his hand across the front of his neck. He turns back to Maya. “You got a guy?”

“Not exactly.” Maya doesn’t want to reveal too much.

“It’s a yes or no question.” Jack chuckles and takes a drink of his soda. “So, you get like a record time today?”

“No. I was a few seconds off.”

Jack grins, goofy. “You’ll get it next time or at State.”

Maya smiles, bashful. “Thanks.”

Jack stands up. “Hey, everybody.” He yells to the crowd. “Bishop, won her race today.” He points down at Maya. “She’s on to Sectionals next week. And then State.”

Maya turns bright red at the attention. “What are you doing?” She whispers.

Jack grins, real big, and looks at her. He starts clapping and then does a fist pump and makes a whooping noise. Some of this buddies hoot and holler too. “Just pumping you up for your next race. We need something to cheer for. The baseball team failed to even get to the postseason this year. We couldn’t score runs to save our asses.”

Maya shakes her head at that jock mentality. Though, it does feel nice to receive support from her classmates. It’s not really something she’s had before. Running is an individual sport. There’s not a lot of camaraderie there.

Carina comes over, pushing Jack out of the way. “My turn.” She tells him.

“You gonna give a speech about Bishop now?” Jack asks with a dopey grin.

“No. Get lost.” Carina sits down next to Maya.

“Fine.” Jack grunts, he sets his soda down and runs and does a cannonball into the pool, slashing everybody in the vicinity.

“So, what did Jack have to say?” Carina asks, handing Maya a water.

“He just wanted to know about my race today.”

Carina hums.

“What? What does that hum mean? I can hear the judgement in your hum, you know.”

Carian chuckles. “You’re silly. You talked to Jack, and you didn’t die, and the world didn’t explode. I know you are nervous about being at this party.”

Maya frowns. She still doesn’t understand how Carina knows all these things about her when she feels like she hardly knows them about herself.

“Let’s go in the pool.” Carina pulls her shirt over her head, and shimmies out of her jeans, revealing her bikini. She checks Maya’s reaction. “You might want to shut your mouth, bella.”

Maya clamps her mouth shut and hurriedly gets up and out of her clothes, down to her two piece suit. She jumps in the pool before Carina can say anything.

There aren’t too many people in the pool. Jack is playing basketball at the other end by himself and a few ‘couples’ float around at the edges. Maya starts swimming around a little bit.

Carina is more graceful with her entrance to the pool. She goes over to the pool ladder and steps down into the water elegantly. Well, at least in Maya’s eyes it’s elegant. Carina floats over near her. Jack comes over and splash them with a wave of water. Carina jumps on him, trying to dunk him under the water. Maya laughs as he struggles. They both team up on him and successfully submerge the boy under the water’s surface.

He comes back up, after they let him go, sputtering and muttering under his breath.

“Getting ganged up on by two girls.” Dean hollers and there is a chorus of laughter.

Jack pouts and goes back to shooting the basketball at the hoop.

Carina raises an eyebrow at Maya. The blonde swims over and Carina tries to turn to face her, but Maya wiggles her finger for Carina to spin around. Maya latches onto Carina’s back, to Carina’s surprise, wrapping her legs around Carina’s waist, her arms around her neck.

Carina swims and walks around with Maya on her back for a bit. They swim over by Jack. He lifts the ball to shoot it towards the hoop, but Maya grabs it from his hands as it’s over his head. Carina laughs at this.

“Hey.” He spins around and sees the pair. Jack sees Maya eyeing the basket. “Shoot it.”

Maya does, draining the shot. Jack raises his hands in the air to celebrate her making it. “What you got, Bishop?” Jack retrieves the ball and throws it to her. Maya has to reach outside her arm span to get to it, almost toppling Carina over in the process.

“Easy back there, tiger.” Carina mumbles, grabbing at Maya’s thighs tighter to keep her connected to her back.

“Shoot it.” Jack challenges, this time getting in front of Carina/Maya and defending against the shot. Carina moves to the left and then to the right to get out of Jack’s reaches. Maya laughs from her back, jostling around trying to aim at the hoop.

“Shoot it.” Jack yells again.

Maya takes the shot, but the ball bounces off the backboards and thuds down against the water’s surface. Jack grabs the ball, brings it up, and dunks it in dramatic fashion.

“Ya’ll wanna play a game?” Dean asks from behind the hoop.

“Yeah, man. Get in here.” Jack encourages.

So, a little basketball game starts. Carina and Maya against Jack and Dean. Maya having to get off of Carina’s back to actually play. Her competitive side taking over and they have a good healthy game against the boys.

Later in the day, Maya pulls Carina aside, sitting down in a pair of Adirondack chairs. After they are done playing in the pool, dried off, and put some clothes back on. Though, Carina still lounges around in her bikini top without a shirt on.

“Can I talk to you about something?” Maya says avoiding Carina’s curious eyes. She’s been thinking about this for the past few days. Maya was waiting for the right time to bring it up, but with each day that passed a right time never came. She’s concluded that a right time isn’t going to come.

“Anything.” She can see that Maya is nervous about whatever it is she wants to talk about. Carina wants to let her know that she can talk about totally anything with her.

“Ya know how I asked if we could wait until my birthday.” Maya grips onto the arms of the Adirondack chair that she’s sitting in.

“Yes.” Carina’s wondering if Maya has changed her mind.

Maya looks up as someone walks past them. She licks her lips. “I’ve been thinking about it the last few days.”

“Okay.”

“And I think it doesn’t have anything to do with my birthday, or that I’m not eighteen, or that we are in high school, or that we are teenagers, or Mr. Fischer. I think I’ve realized that those are all just excuses I’m using.” She takes a deep breath, waiting for Carina to say something.

“Okay.”

Maya wrinkles up her face. She thought Carina would have something more profound to say than just okay.

“I maybe have been trying to avoid it.” She gives Carina guilty smile. “And I can tell that you feel that. And I’m sorry about that. And-“ She sighs. “I’m nervous because- uh- sex changes everything. That coupled with all the uncertainty in the near future with going to university and you going to Italy. It’s got me freaked out.”

Carina nods. “So, this means you don’t want to have sex.”

Maya shakes her head. “You don’t understand.” She’s getting frustrated now. At herself, mostly, because she feels like she’s not explaining this correctly. “Everything in my life has certainty to it. The rule is eyes forward. I can always envision what’s going to happen. I’m always looking to the future. I know what’s going to happen with my running and training, my schedule. I’ve known where I’m going to college for over a year now. My father has made sure of that. Always look forward. Every day has had a plan. Every day I know what to expect. I know what’s going to happen. Or I did, until I met you. It’s the unknown, the uncertainty that is freaking me out. And while things are good between us now, sex changes everything, and I feel like the uncertainty about what happens after is something I’m scared about.”

“You don’t want it to ruin what we have now.” Carina says.

It’s like a little lightbulb goes off in Maya’s brain. “Yes, exactly.”

Carina nods. “Okay. I can understand that. And we can go with that but what if-“ She raises an eyebrow. “Will you take my hand?” Carina holds her hand out. There is a little bit of space between their Adirondack chairs but not a lot. Maya glances around but reaches out and puts her hand in Carina’s. “What if instead of ruining something it only makes things better, stronger?”

Maya hadn’t thought of that possibility. She’s gotten herself so worked up in her head, overthinking everything that the only possibly outcomes that she can come up with are negative ones.

“I know it sucks. That I’m going to Italy and that we are going to different schools. It sucks but that’s life. And you just have to find ways to deal with it. And I know you have schedules, and routines, and everything is regimented. I admire you for that. I like that you have so much passion and work ethic and dedication. It’s admirable. But maybe, just maybe, that has you stuck or struggling in some other ways.” She raises her left hand. “I’m not saying that’s a bad thing. But not everything is going to be in your control always.”

Maya is starting to realize that the last few weeks. High school was a nice, safe, comfortable place for her. She had total control over her grades, and the races she ran, and who her friends were. Now that real life is knocking, and things aren’t going to be in her control so much anymore, that’s where that uncertainty about everything comes in. And it’s all culminating into a, sort of, fear of the unknown.

“Yeah.” Maya agrees with the last thing Carina said. She squeezes Carina’s hand, hoping it will give her a sense of security.

“So now what?” Carina asks.

Maya doesn’t know if she can talk about this anymore right now. That was already a lot to reveal, and at a graduation party no less. “I don’t know. I’m kinda hungry.” After swimming, she feels like she needs more to eat. That doubled with the fact that a few hours ago she run a 10,000 meter race. Eating again won’t hurt anything.

Carina laughs. She lets Maya’s hand go and pokes her in the side. “Let’s go feed your belly.” She pulls Maya to her feet.

They go over to the food table and Carina hovers behind Maya as they fill a plate with food. Carina pointing at things she wants, like shrimp, and Maya adding that to the plate along with the items she wants. Carina keeps a hand on Maya’s hip the entire time. “I have some questions I want to ask you.” She whispers in Maya’s ear.

Maya nods and swallows thickly. It’s bad enough that Carina is walking around in a bikini at this party. But then here she is with a steady hand on her hip, not quite pressed into her from behind; but Maya can feel her warm presence, and now whispering lowly in her ear, the breath across her cheek. It’s enough to drive anyone mad.

“Later though.” Carina adds. She likes this. She really does. Carina has slept with a few boys but that’s all it ever was. There was no conversation, no flirting, no enticing the other person, teasing them. A quick bang and nothing more. She had a fling with Arizona from a rival high school last summer. But that was four weeks of them meeting up in secret, not much conversation, no romance or relationship. Mostly just them hooking up and living off the thrill of it being a secret and not getting caught.

But this thing with Maya is different than all of that. And she loves it and craves it. Even if Maya is a little all over the place. There is conversation, there is goofiness and fun, teasing. And romance and intimacy and quiet and peacefulness. An actual relationship. Something that Carina hasn’t had before. Just to be able to smile at Maya and be acknowledged is such a lovely feeling that a simple smile in return from Maya makes her feel good. And a kiss makes her feel great and full of hope and little butterflies in her stomach and all sorts of cliché things.

They say patience is a virtue. If so, Carina is going to be the most virtuous person on the planet. She totally understands Maya’s trepidation. She wants to blame Lane for that, along with so many other things. He has his daughter so dialed in and thinking in a certain way that she doesn’t know what to do when something doesn’t go as planned; other than freeze up, stiffen up, and clam up about it. She thinks it’s a shame that it has to be this way, but Carina isn’t going to let it deter her any.

They sit down at a table and eat, and Carina finally asks her questions afterwards. “What will make you feel better, or more comfortable, or ease that feeling of the unknown? Is it me?”

Maya screws her face up in confusion. “You? No. What?”

Carina smiles at the adorableness of Maya’s confusion. “Is there something about me that you’re not comfortable with? Are you intimidated?” She words the question better.

“Oh.” Maya’s face stays confused though. She looks over. Carina is sitting right next to her. Next to being more like, Carina is straddling the bench, her right leg actually behind Maya’s backside, the left leg practically pressed up against Maya’s. Maya eyes shift from Carina’s face, glancing down and then back up. Carina just grins, knowing what Maya is looking at. “No.” Maya says, lying, smiling a little to let Carina know that she is lying.

“Oh, really? Cuz I think you were just staring at my boobs.” Carina wiggles her eyebrows.

Maya clears her throat. “You’re so hot, sometimes it makes me nervous. It’s intimidating, yes.”

Carina laughs. “Thank you, bella. But you shouldn’t be nervous about it. It’s just body parts.”

“See, and I don’t know how you do that. It might be just body parts but-“ Maya has to collect her thoughts. “But- I’m not a doctor’s kid.” Maya thinks that’s it.

Carina hums. “So, you’re at a disadvantage.”

“No.” Maya shakes her head. “You’re at an advantage. How many other kids are as comfortable as you are with body parts and sex and talking about sex?”

Just then, Owen Hunt sits down on Maya’s right side. “Are we talking about sex, ladies?”

Carina rolls her eyes. “Go away, Owen.”

He pouts. “In a week I will be going away for eight weeks.”

“Why?” Maya asks.

Owen raises an eyebrow, interested to see that Maya doesn’t know why he is going to be gone for eight weeks. “I’ve joined the Army. Eight weeks of basic training.” He smiles proudly. “I wanna be an Army medic.”

Maya hums. Interesting.

“Go away, Owen.” Carina says again.

“Ohhh, you’re going to make me leave? That’s no fair. What did I ever do to you?” His lips twist up into a snarl. “Now that I think about it, I think I’ll stay.” He folds his hands together on top of the table. “What were we talking about? I was walking by, and I heard the word sex. Who’s having sex with who? Do you have some hot gossip?”

“No one.” Carina tells him.

He raises a challenging eyebrow. “Then why were you talking about sex?” He’s suspicious.

“Just go away.” Carina waves a hand at him.

He frowns and gets up, eyeing them suspiciously but leaving.

“Is he always that nosy?” Maya asks.

Carina rolls her eyes. “Yes, it’s annoying.”

Maya leans in and smirks at the annoyed look on Carina’s face. She puts a hand on Carina’s thigh. “You’re the one who slept with him.” She grins and the look of surprise on Carina’s face is totally worth it.

“You know what? If I didn’t want to get out of here, I would totally pick you up right now and throw you back in the pool.” Carina threatens.

“You wouldn’t.”

“Try me.”

Maya raises her hands, waving them in front of herself. She doesn’t want to get all wet again either.

Carina sets a hand on Maya’s back. “I can get you all wet in other ways.” Cocky, confident Carina smirks.

Maya closes her eyes. “You’re very naughty. I know you know that.” She opens her eyes and looks over at Carina. Carina just grins and Maya shakes her head at her. “Let’s go.”

They get up and Maya throws away her paper plate and they go around saying goodbye to everyone. Carina leading the way, holding on to Maya’s hand as she trails behind. They get done with that and move toward the gate to the back yard and run into Owen again.

Owen moves to stand in front of the gate opening, not letting them pass.

Carina nods her head at him. “Get out of the way. Now isn’t the time for childish games.”

He folds his arms over his chest and nods at Maya. “You left me for her.”

Carina stares at him for a moment. He can’t be serious but the expression on his face never changes to indicate this is a joke. “No, Owen. I didn’t leave you. We hooked up a couple of times. That was it.” She turns to Maya, but Maya is looking at the ground, so she turns back to Owen. “We were never a thing. I don’t know what little ego trip you are on right now, but this isn’t about you. Now move.” She shoves past Owen, pulling Maya ahead of her and having her go out the gate first. Carina turns back to Owen for a brief moment and glares at him. “Grow up.”

Carina follows after Maya, who seems to be almost running to get to the car. “Hey.” Now she’s going to have to deal with the aftermath. “Fucking egotistical manic.” She mumbles under her breath about Owen. “Hey.” She calls after Maya.

Maya gets to the passenger’s side of the car and pulls on the door handle, but it won’t open. “Unlock the car.”

Carina doesn’t. She doesn’t want Maya to get in yet. She catches up and stands next to Maya. “Don’t listen to him. Forget what he said.”

“What if he tells everybody about us?” Maya whimpers.

Carina wants to say so what, screw him but she knows that won’t be helpful. “He might. It’s a possibility. But-“ She licks her lips, reach out and putting a hand on Maya’s shoulder, turning her so she can look at her. “-what’s anyone going to do?”

“Gossip about us.”

Carina sighs. This is one of those things that she feared would happen. She thought it would happen while they were still in school because she couldn’t resist sitting with Maya, talking to her, sometimes holding her hand, but she always tried to conceal that from other’s eyes. But if other kids were paying attention, and a few were, they would know that something was going on between them. It didn’t seem like anyone talked about it though. And maybe it was just that. No one was bother enough to talk about it. Stuff happens all the time in high school but only some things or some people get talked about. Maybe no one cared enough or there was other hot gossip to talk about. Carina doesn’t really know.

“We’re not in high school anymore.” Carina reminds her. “Whatever happens back there, happens back there.” She thumbs over her shoulder back towards the party. “I don’t care what anyone has to say. If someone talks today, or if they talked two weeks ago, or four weeks ago, I don’t care. It’s just talk. And I know that’s easy to say, but it’s true. What matters to me is you and I. Not what anyone else says or thinks.”

“You’re a lot braver than I am.” Maya sucks her bottom lip into her mouth. She speaks slowly, making sure that she gets every word right.  “I love that you don’t care about other people’s opinions.” Maya looks into those dazzling warm brown eyes and feels better. “Owen’s a toolbag.”

Carina laughs and pulls Maya into a hug. “He is.”

“Then why did you sleep with him?” Maya doesn’t mean to ask. That’s really none of her business.

“Ah-“ Maya has caught her off guard with that question. “I suppose I probably had more to drink than I should have at the time.”

“It was more than once.” Maya mumbles.

“Okay. True. Twice.” Carina shakes her head. “I don’t know. I honestly- there’s nothing about his personality that I like. He’s got a nice smile. I don’t know. It was poor judgement. It was one of those things-“ She doesn’t really have an explanation for it, at least not one she wants to tell to Maya just yet. Not that she thinks she needs one either. But being put on the spot, she rambles a little. “We were both at a party and it happened. Twice. That’s it. It was a fun moment and that was it. At least for me. Apparently, he seems to harbor some different feelings.”

“Can we go home?” Maya doesn’t think she wants to hear about Carina sleeping with Owen, knowing the details. She just wanted to know the why.

Carina nods, glum. “Yeah.”