Chapter 5: The Grim River (narrator)

The sound of Romans heart gently beating, resembled a sound he had heard once before. The beating heart of a fetus. In the darkness of his eyelids Roman began to feel as if he was in the womb once again, the warm sanguine fluid seemed to cradle him back through time, in the only place he was ever safe, inside his mothers womb. Within the woman who would have given the world for him, the woman who had given her life just so this pitiful man could open his eyes and breathe.

Suddenly Roman's chest rose and he felt the flow of oxygen into his lungs, he felt a sense of tingling liveliness through his entire body, his limbs stretching out into space as, his blood circulating through each sprawling limb, giving Roman the breathe of life. Roman had reverted into a state of youth. In his age, his brain had begun to betray him, creating illusions of that which he longed for each sedentary day of his despicable existence. That longing to be a child once again, a fetus, to be at peace with no rhyme nor reason. He wanted to be blissfully ignorant once again, so his eyes projected that which he wanted so deeply. Though it was not all the workings of his mind, Roman could feel something, someone, a life that seemed to keep near him. In his sleep he saw its shadow in the window, during the day it would haunt him with chills in his spine and darkness in the morning. He had become afraid of this figure. As his mind had entranced him with a mirage of youthful, childlike wonder, he began to forget the realities of his life, forgotten the figure, the regret, and the pain that rattled every inch of his body. For a moment as he awake and lay in his bed he was reminded of his childhood bedroom, the smell of the morning bacon, pancakes, the warmth of the sun on his face every morning. He felt for once at peace, but alas this mirage faded, he opened his eyes to a room of sound and fury. His brain felt as if it was swelling, and pain overcame his elderly frame. His chest grew heavy and dry, it felt scratchy as if something had scratched the inside of his throat. He began to cough, cough, wheezing for air. Roman collapsed tot he ground in a fit of coughs and saw blood on his hand.

He hobbled back onto his stick like legs and made his way tot he bathroom, he looked in the mirror, but there seemed not to be any blood anywhere, looking back down at his hand and the ground which he had spewed the blood. There was nothing there, as if it didn't exist at all. He looked back into the mirror, he looked as if he was morphing, his wrinkling skin became tight and slowly he morphed into a depiction of his younger self. He saw the complexion of the smooth tanned boy he had once been. He felt marvelously young again(but only from a mental perspective) he outstretched his arms in awe. This illusion of youth had almost swollen Roman's ego, he smiled a toothy yellow smile to himself and began to laugh in elation of the wonderous feat. Roman pushed his body off the floor and tottered his truthfully senile body to his bedroom. Upon arriving he noticed something odd a note on the ground, not just any note but one from Sebastian Solas, he had memorized the curvature in Sebastian's signature. He had written it a hundred times and a hundred times again. Until the letters had soaked in his brain. The letter frightened him to his core, as it was covered in cardenal red finger prints. Stains that reeked of dried a dried copper, and salty tears. His heart began pulsating rapidly, sporadic and unevenly. He stepped closer to see what exactly on the letter.

Coming closer to the paper Roman realized that there were no comprehensible words on the page at all, nothing but a cacophony of symbols that rattled in his brain. Ramon could hear Sebastian in his head mumbling, pleading for something he could not understand. The befuddled man, looked around his now oddly unfamiliar room helplessly looking for his beloved, but Sebastian was no where to be found, he was long gone. Even so, the voices in Romans head deluged his eyes with tears of agony, tormenting his fragile mind.

"Sebastian!"

Roman Shouted with tears flooding his eyes, he shouted for his long lost love. His lamentation grew so loud that it echoed around the house, the walls began to tremble. They shook with every blood curdling scream.

"I'm so, sorry Sebastian!" He fell to his knees, and he became like a fountain, his eyes spouting tears.

"I love you Sebastian!" The regret filled his soul, Roma was no innocent man, Roman had committed a heinous act. Something that he could never undo. This guilt filled his soul with misery and turmoil forcing out the tears like a hose. It was as if his body was a vessel for all the tears of every miserable soul that had ever existed. Roman cried, and felt the screams, the pain, the guilt, the misery of a million different souls.

"Please come back to me Sebastian!" He screamed like a dying man, his tears be again to fill the room, as he slowly drowned in his own befuddled screams of pain.

The man yelled until he felt his lungs give in on him, and his stomach turning in a pitiful misery. his eyes watering out until his tears started to fill the room, his body becoming submerged in his overflowing sorrow. After struggling to swim to the top of the water, breathing in his very last breathe, his weak bones grew tired of the struggle, and he let go. His room overflowed with the salty lake of desolation, the elderly man grew despondent, allowing his hollow body to skink to the very bottom of his sorrow, until his sorrow had turned into a dismal and empty lake.

He allowed his lungs to give in, they filled with water and his body was unresponsive.

Roman had reached his final state. In his final stage of grief his disappeared into the murky river of mourning.