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Desolate Fate

On the day he first met a cultivator, Yaan’s life was changed forever. All that he cared for was ripped away from him. He was forced into a despair-inducing situation, but he endured, he fought, he refused to give up. But why did he persevere, what drove him to go on? With nothing to return to, his hatred and rage fuelled his will to survive… But hatred begets more hatred and the flames of rage are extinguished with time. He was desperately clinging to any thread of meaning that he could find, but heated emotions do not last forever, and ambitions are rarely easily achieved. A person changes over time, often into that which they once despised… Life…is a struggle. A struggle against the world, a struggle against our own nature, and a struggle against fate. This is the tale of a lone person’s struggle through a twisted world, and his desperate attempt to resist his desolate fate.

SpicyDaoist · ファンタジー
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420 Chs

A Change of Plans

The Primordial Sage's dao heart was…the heart of dao?

Many of the divinities present, and those observing the situation from afar, felt like they must have misheard. Either they had misheard, or this was some sort of deceptive scheme by the World Demon…right?

This must be the case! How could a living being possibly cultivate a dao heart of dao itself?!

Dao as a whole, often called the 'grand dao', was eternal and boundless, it was infinite and without limits. The boundless nature made it impossible to cultivate with any direction, so cultivators did not cultivate the grand dao as a whole directly, but split the grand dao into countless fragments of the grand dao. These fragments were sometimes called 'named daos', not to be confused with the immortal stage named dao heart - though the fundamental concept was the same, they were called 'named daos' because they were defined by a simple name, such as 'fate', 'evil' or 'defiance'. These named daos were restricted within certain limits, they were not endless in all directions and without bounds like the grand dao.

Of course, even a named dao was seemingly without limits when cultivated, but that was only with regards to how far the path of that dao stretched. The grand dao itself not only stretched on forever like the named daos, it also didn't exist within any definable confines, with its endlessness stretching out in every conceivable direction.

To give an example, the named daos were like infinitely long rivers; nobody could say where an infinite river started, nor if it had any sort of end, but you could at least see across the width of the river, from one side to the other. On the other hand, the grand dao was akin to an infinite sea, it had no beginning, nor an end that could be seen, but unlike the river, it also had no boundaries, it was simply an endless expanse of water!

It was possible to pursue a river whilst floating along its current, even if it did flow for an infinite distance; there was a clear direction to be followed and progress could be made along the river, even if the end could not be seen. However, how could one possibly follow the flow of an infinite ocean? If a person found themselves floating within the midst of such an ocean, they would inevitably lose themselves, disoriented by its endless vastness, which seemed to have no rhyme, reason or direction.

For this reason, nobody had even considered the possibility that the Primordial Sage might cultivate the dao of…dao!

It seemed impossible, but Yaan saw things differently. After all, all rivers started and ended in the ocean, did they not? So then, what if a person were to comprehend many, many rivers…say…3 million rivers?

The revelation that the Primordial Sage cultivated a heart of dao was shocking enough, both for her, and for everyone watching. However, this wasn't nearly the most shocking revelation which would shake the entire world on this day.

Yaan looked into the Primordial Sage's eyes, maintaining his gaze of Void in order to persuade her of the truth. He stared at her with wide eyes, his abyssal gaze weighing down on her heart, but his words pressuring her even more.

The Sage was the most intelligent being in the 2nd Origin Era, so she had of course considered the possibility that perhaps, her heart of void might be a false dao heart, she knew that such things existed after all. However, after investigating this matter, after delving into her own heart, and into dao itself, for the past millions of years, the Sage had come to a definitive conclusion – there was simply no dao in this world that could support a false heart of void!

The only possible contender was the dao of origin, but the Sage found that the dao of origin was simply too profound for any one being to cultivate it as their heart. The Origin encompassed all things and all living beings, how could an individual base their heart upon something like that?

Anyway, if she truly did possess a heart of origin, then she should have had an easy time cultivating this dao…but she did not. The dao of origin was too profound, too mysterious, too elusive; she couldn't grasp more than a trace of the dao of origin, no matter how much she tried.

Since her dao heart was not the dao of origin, she had concluded that her heart must indeed be the heart of void.

Even the Sage had never considered the possibility that she might cultivate a heart of dao. It was just common sense that dao could not be cultivated as a whole!

And indeed, cultivating a heart of dao should be impossible. If the Sage was truly an ordinary living being born in this Origin Era, that really would be the case.

But the Sage was not an ordinary living being, that much was clear.

The Sage was not born in this Origin Era, that much Yaan knew without a doubt.

"Sage, did you also know about the stone ring?" Yaan suddenly asked.

The Sage's emerald eyes cleared up, hiding her doubts and daze from her expression. To begin with, only Yaan could see the brief flickers of emotion that appeared in her eyes, though everyone could see the black abyssal cracks which ripped apart her body, each time a trace of an emotion appeared within her heart and damaged her Dao Soul.

"The stone ring?" She repeated back, speaking in her usual monotone voice.

To others, her voice sounded as usual, but Yaan could hear her wavering. Compared to her usual state of complete calmness and zero emotions, the appearance of these faint emotions was akin to the Sage having a full-blown mental breakdown.

She was not accustomed to feeling things…she was not accustomed to allowing herself to feel emotions, without cutting off the part of her heart that could feel. As such, the Sage simply did not know how to deal with these emotions, other than to shut down, put on a plain expression, and pretend – both for those around her, and for herself – that everything was fine.

With just a few words from Yaan, the Primordial Sage was falling apart. He had expected this, for a simple reason.

The dao heart consisted of two components; dao and heart, corresponding to comprehension and will. 

But the Primordial Sage's heart…was also dao.

If Defiance's dao heart could be said to focus entirely on will whilst disregarding comprehension, then the Primordial Sage was the opposite – her dao heart was entirely focussed on comprehension, to the extent that she disregarded will…she did not cultivate the strength of her heart, only understanding.

The Primordial Sage, the most mysterious being in the 2nd Origin Era, one of the most powerful, ancient and feared beings throughout the world…had a weak heart. In fact, her heart was so weak, that simply feeling emotions was enough to damage her Dao Soul…

Yaan couldn't begin to imagine what had caused her to become this way, but it should be her experiences prior to entering the 2nd Origin Era that had shaped her into this sort of person.

After all, he had determined that the Primordial Sage should be the Core Origin Incarnation of whomever she had been before entering this Origin Era, meaning that she held the core values of her original complete self.

As far as Yaan was aware, there was no known 'God of Dao' . Based on the reactions of those around him, nobody seemed to know about any God of Dao.

Yaan wasn't particularly surprised. He had already realised that not every god was known, or perhaps it was just that not every god's dao was known.

For example, Love Empyrean. He felt relatively confident that Love Empyrean was an outsider, and her dao was most definitely the dao of love, yet nobody had connected her with a 'God of Love'. Either she had kept a low profile in the 1st Origin Era, or she had hidden her true dao in the past, or maybe her dao had somehow changed or evolved, or perhaps she was from a different Era entirely…there were too many things that Yaan didn't understand, so he couldn't say for sure.

Hopefully, whatever happened next with the Primordial Sage would broaden his understanding of the world.

"Sage, I'm certain that you already know about the stone ring, since even your sister could see through this matter. The stone ring is a Dao Treasure, yet you three sisters can use it, as can many others. On top of this, every individual who can use the stone ring, shares a unique dao soul trait. What does this all mean? I think you know, Sage, because it can only mean one thing. Dao Treasures can only be used by their creators, because they are intrinsically tied to the creator's dao. If multiple individuals are able to use a Dao Treasure, it can only mean that every single one of those individuals…is in fact the same person, originating from the same Dao Soul."

Yaan paused, giving the Sage time to process his words. Perhaps, she had already realised this truth since long ago, but if she thought about this matter right now, after he had revealed the truth of her dao heart to her, it should help her to break through her false dao heart, accepting reality and revealing her true dao heart within.

He didn't know how she had comprehended a dao heart of dao to begin with. Assuming that all other outsiders were from the 1st Origin Era like Defiance claimed, Yaan supposed that since the 1st Origin Era was far longer than the 2nd Origin Era, and the upper limit of power was much higher, perhaps she had encountered many unique chances over an exceedingly long life.

He couldn't guess how she had reached the point of forming her heart of dao, but Yaan did have some thoughts on how she would need to go about comprehending such a vast and profound dao heart after reincarnating into a much shorter, more restricted Origin Era, like this one…

Cultivators comprehended named daos, because like rivers, they were confined to flowing within a limited space. Cultivators could not comprehend the grand dao directly, because like oceans, the grand dao was boundless, the flow unclear, the direction impossible to grasp.

But was it not also a fact that rivers started and ended at the ocean?

Perhaps an individual could not grasp the ocean directly, but what if three million individuals grasped three million rivers, all of which connected to the same ocean? Perhaps like this, they would be able to see the bigger picture of that ocean!

It was an insane idea, but maybe, such a thing just might be possible.

"Primordial Sage, wake up. There is no such thing as a heart of void, because all living beings possess emotional desires. If you did not feel desire, then why would you so adamantly seek dao to begin with? Your heart is the heart of dao, you are the Core Origin Incarnation of an Origin God from outside of this Era, and you…are one of three million such Origin Incarnations of your full self in this Era!"

Yaan's words resounded like thunderclaps, not just in the Primordial Sage's ears, but in the ears of all those who heard him speak. Those Origin Gods who understood the implications of his words shuddered, hoping with all their hearts that this was just some sort of ruse, that what he said was not the truth…

But then, those individuals noticed something.

The hateful Primordial Spirit was no longer struggling to conceal her immense pain and hatred.

The concealed killing intent that forever lingered around the Primordial Asura, had simply…frozen.

In fact, both women had completely frozen!

It wasn't just them, either…

Down on the continent, Ji Suzu, the immortal who cultivated the dao of dreams, had also frozen in space and time.

On Rainbow Mountain, Xuqi Laila finally stopped cultivating, as everything about her froze.

There were several examples like this throughout the world, but even more of these examples could be found hidden deep within the Origin. The absorbed Dao Souls of the three million deceased Origin incarnations, suddenly became active once again, separating from the Origin, despite having been reabsorbed by the Origin since long ago!

For one reason or another, they were all female. For another reason that Yaan couldn't quite discern, though it certainly related to his fate, those women had all impacted his life in one way or another, either directly or indirectly.

The three Primordial Demon sisters, Xuqi Laila and Ji Suzu, were the only incarnations that he had met whom were still alive. Aside from then, several other women who had seriously affected him during his life appeared in his mind…

Zue Yin.

The Bloody Totem Tribe Leader.

Elia.

June.

Flora.

The Void comprehension manifesting within him made it such that Yaan could not feel any emotions right now, but why was it that this numbness seemed to hurt worse than any emotion ever could?

Just whom was this mysterious God, and why did he share such deep fate with them, to the extent that, in one way or another, with one incarnation or another, with one relationship or another…they had almost always been by his side?

Really, what the hell was this? So many women who had impacted his life, from his introduction to the cultivation world until now…from friends, to enemies, to allies, to teachers, to manipulators, to subordinates, and even his mortal wife…all those relationships…were actually the same person.

What a twisted world this was.

He didn't have time to dwell on this, Yaan suddenly felt like he couldn't hold out anymore. He didn't know if he had said enough, but he was unwilling to fall into that state of Void again – if he did so, then there was no telling if and when he would wake up once again.

He quickly shut his eyes, then counteracted the Void comprehension by focussing on his dao of fate. Based on his very vague understanding, the reason that he was able to comprehend the Void without simply ceasing to exist, should be related to his dao heart of fate. He had realised this during the past 10,000 years - this could be considered an unexpectedly huge gain from this lengthy period of time, making him feel like the time wasn't completely wasted.

It might seem insignificant at a glance, but it actually gave him much deeper insight into his own dao of fate.

Back when he first comprehended the Void, his dao heart hadn't even reached the immortal stage, meaning that he had not fully established his dao heart as a dao heart of fate back then. And yet, even at that point in time, his dao of fate had protected him…

This showed that his dao of fate which only appeared in his future, had protected him in the past! Much like the paradoxes that he had been starting to explore, his past was somehow affected by his future dao!

His dao of fate was actually so profound that it did not abide by the usual laws of space-time!

If he could fully grasp this aspect of his dao of fate, and learn to utilise his future dao attainments to support him in the present, the benefits of this couldn't even be imagined.

Perhaps this was the reason that his future self seemed to deliberately establish that paradox, creating an inheritance to support his past self!

 

The Sage had entered a state of enlightenment, and with her two sisters frozen, the divinities immediately felt completely dumbfounded, hardly able to believe that this was real.

The Primordial Sage was really an outsider? This alone shocked some people, since they knew that when the Origin Gods entered the 2nd Origin Era, they were forced to give something up, such as their memories, strength, dao comprehension, and so on. The more shocking their Origin Incarnation, the more they would need to give up, so just what exactly did they sacrifice, to become the Primordial Sage?

But this…

The Primordial Sage was just the Core Origin Incarnation…the two Primordial Demon sisters were both subsidiary Origin Incarnations…along with three million others?

Just which God was this?! Just what did this God give up, in order to enter this Origin Era in such a terrifying manner?!

As the Void faded from his gaze and he took in the surroundings – the dazed Sage finally entering a true state of enlightenment, and her two sisters who had been drawn in – Yaan's eyes sparkled with a terrifying glint.

The divinities were already so shocked right now, it made him wonder how they would feel soon enough. 

What was it that Yaan wanted from all this?

Simple – he wanted the Primordial Sage to ascend.

Others wouldn't be able to understand his logic, because they didn't know the truth – that the Sage Plane was in fact the Primordial Sage's Sea of Consciousness.

What would happen to the world, when the Primordial Sage ascended past the Origin, leaving this world behind?

All Yaan could say for sure, was that it would create a moment of absolute chaos, a moment that only he knew was coming, giving him a chance to escape, conceal himself, and then watch the show play out from the shadows. So long as he had some time, Yaan had absolute confidence that he would be able to completely conceal all traces of himself from the world.

As soon as Defiance determined that Yaan could not be found, he would definitely switch his target to Shi, especially if this plan went as he hoped, and the net of destruction was brought down, forcing Shi to return to the world in human form. Defiance did not actually hate Yaan, he only hated the Origin Fate and wanted to disprove its inevitability. Since Defiance also hated Shi, he would naturally target her over Yaan, if Yaan vanished and Shi reappeared.

Defiance had taunted Yaan, saying that running away and simply surviving 'wasn't wilful', but what did he know of Yaan's will? 

Surviving was Yaan's greatest battle tactic. So long as he survived, he could live to fight another day. On that day, he would definitely be stronger than before.

Until he had the strength to suppress the world directly, why should he fight directly?

But when the day came that he finally had the power to suppress the world directly, why would he bother with schemes and trickery?!

Yaan saw no reason to fight directly right now. In fact…he saw no reason to even entertain the 2nd Origin Era with his efforts any longer.

The mortal world had been destroyed, and he could feel that the Heavenly Dao's dao of creation had collapsed, meaning that no new living beings would appear from this point until the end of the Era. Defiance Sovereign was obsessively hunting him down, and whilst he could probably hold his own against Defiance, now that he had touched the boundary of the Origin Step…why bother?

Yaan did not care about the battle with Defiance, the only battle he cared about was the battle against fate. Now that he had comprehended the true meaning of his will, fighting Defiance had lost all meaning, for now at least.

He had spent some time and effort establishing the Paradise Sect, but without the mortal world, this organisation no longer had any use. Sure, he could return to the Paradise Sect, he could fight and spread his conquest through the stars, perhaps he could even establish the world's largest force, but…why bother?

He wanted to comprehend the use of nurturing and expanding his own force, but he saw no merit in conquering a broken, dying world. Battling Defiance was even more meaningless, especially since he had no chance of taking his life in this Era.

And then, there was still the impending invasion of the Paragon Wills…

The world had become more hassle than it was worth. The world had changed, and Yaan had achieved his previous objectives, so naturally, he immediately adapted his plans.

He would throw the world into a state of chaos, conceal himself, sit back, then watch the show as the divinities slaughtered each other, destroying the world in the process. 

At this point, Yaan only wanted to explore the world alone, hidden, and in peace, seeking dao comprehension as he properly processed his many gains that had been accumulated since reaching the Divine Step. He no longer cared to involve himself in worldly matters; the current world simply wasn't worth it. At most, he would silently observe the world, studying the end days as the world walked towards its destruction.

And so, Yaan had decided to completely disappear. He would conceal himself not only from Defiance, but from the entire world. Unless something came up that made it worth his while to reveal himself, he would wonder the world as a ghost, vanishing from the public eye.

He just needed to get away from Defiance, remove the Primordial Sage from the equation, and break the net of destruction. So long as he could achieve these three things, he was confident that nobody would be able to find him; for a period of time, he would be able to experience a unique sort of freedom…

Of course, this all relied on his plan working out.

As Yaan watched the Primordial Sage rapidly accumulating millions of threads of fate, both to the living and the dead, he knew that he had chosen the right path. 

Gradually, the other divinities started to feel alarmed as an immense sense of danger filled their hearts. They couldn't help but look towards the World Demon warily…

This was definitely his doing!

Yaan smiled faintly.

Indeed, whilst he primarily just wanted to disappear, it would also be good if he could kill some of those individuals who had the potential to transcend the Era. The fewer Origin Gods that left the 2nd Origin Era, the less competition he would have later on. 

Once again, he was making use of various powers that did not belong to him, in order to kill the enemy. 

Yaan felt no shame in doing this; the way he saw it, this was just another battle tactic. Why fight in an upright manner, when he was so good at fighting in a non-upright manner?

Grasping every variable within his palm, capitalising on his strengths and using them to his advantage.

Fighting rampantly when possible, fighting intelligently when needed.

Biding his time as he accumulated momentum, then exploding outwards in one go, shaking the world with a single step!

Living unrestrained by any notions that he should be a certain way, act a certain way, or fight a certain way.

Doing whatever needed to be done, without hesitation, regret or doubt.

It didn't matter how others saw him; he saw himself, and he was living as he should.

All that mattered, was fighting with all his might to emerge victorious in the end.

And if he lost?

So long as he did everything that could be done, he would never have any regrets.

For Yaan, this was what it meant to live according to his heart. His ambition was his heart, and his heart was his ambition.

This was his dao of fate. This was his will of fate. This was what it meant to create his own fate.