22. Chapter 22

An hour later, and Erin's living room looked like a scene from a holiday commercial. Everyone sat around the dining room table that was laden with a variety of savory, festive dishes. In the center a perfectly cooked turkey sat ready to be enjoyed by her guests. Erin sat at one end of the table, and Hank had naturally ended up at the other end. Instinctively, as their boss, everyone's gaze had turned to him once they were all settled around the table.

He cleared his throat before speaking, "This year has been a difficult one for most of us. It's been a year of loss and difficult obstacles that we've all had to overcome. Our city and nation have been in turmoil and at times it's been hard to find that silver lining." His gaze swept the table, spending a moment looking at each person seated. His gaze skimmed over Alvin, "Some of you have been by my side from the beginning. While others have only been on my team for a few years." His eyes rested on Will Halstead, "and then there's Will, who I first thought was a serial killer." Everyone chuckled, with Will nodding at Voight with a smile. "But everyone here is friend or family, and for most of us friendship is family." He raised his glass. "So this year, I am thankful to those at this table for being my family."

Everyone toasted, and the thankful praises continued around the table. Everyone gave a few heart-filled words, some humorous and some poignant, until finally it was Erin's turn.

Her smile was bright as she surveyed the people at the table, "Thank you everyone for coming here tonight. When I decided to cook Thanksgiving dinner, I don't even know if I thought anyone would come, but it means the world to me that so many of you think of me as family." She stared across the table at Daniel, where he sat in his high chair next to Hank and Jay, and gave the guys a sad smile. "Some families you are born into, but the ones that you choose, or maybe the ones that choose you, sometimes can be the most precious gift in the world." Her eyes drifted towards Jay, who was staring softly at her, his eyes bright with what could only be described as love. She opened her mouth to say something. She wanted to thank him for everything he had done that day. The dinner, the cooking, helping with Daniel. The words were on the tip of her tongue, yet she just couldn't figure out how to start. Her eyes fluttered closed for a moment as she tried to think of the words that could express her gratitude, but not reveal too much to her co-workers. "I, ah,-"

Ruzek interrupted, "I am thankful of the job that Jay did on this turkey, and I am starving, so let's wrap up all this feel good stuff and eat!"

Everyone chuckled at his comment, except Erin and Jay. He just looked at her with those all-knowing eyes, and she knew that he was aware of her words left unsaid. As everyone started passing the dishes around the table, Erin mouthed the words she hadn't said aloud, "Thank you."

The small smile that formed on his lips, made her heart accelerate just a bit. He gave her a small nod, and she could tell he appreciated the comment, even if she hadn't shared it with the group. Erin knew that they had taken a small step forward today. Her anger was definitely gone, but there was still a lot of confusion in her heart.

Dinner was a boisterous affair with wine flowing freely and conversation upbeat and full of humor. Adam tended to dominate the conversation, and with Sylvie, Michelle, and Will there, he had a fresh audience for his favorite stories.

"So then Kevin loses the guy in the crowd and Jay and I have to hunt him down in the middle of a concert." He glances at Jay, "Do you remember that? I think you tackled the guy from some rigging."

Jay laughed, "Yeah, I do remember it, but a little differently. Weren't you tailing the guy, not Kevin?"

Adam shook his head, "No, it was Kevin. I'm sure."

Alvin lifted his attention from his dinner plate, "I notice that all your stories are blamed on Kevin tonight."

Shrugging, Adam shook his head, "Hey, that's what a guy gets for skipping out on Intelligence Thanksgiving."

Kim jumped in to defend her friend, "Hey, his family is in Chicago." Atwater of course was spending the holiday with his little brother and sister as well as the rest of his family. Adam just chuckled and continued with another tale.

Conversation continued to flow as everyone ate and enjoyed the dinner. Erin's eyes kept drifting to where Jay sat. He was smiling all throughout dinner, but he was still pretty quiet for Jay. He allowed Adam and Will to fill the conversation with their stories. Both were natural storytellers, and usually Jay joined in with his sarcasm and humor. Tonight though, he allowed the other guys to tell the stories and only occasionally added a comment or two. Since Daniel was seated in between Jay and Hank, his attention instead seemed to pass back and forth between enjoying Daniel's antics with his dinner and looking down the table to watch Erin thoughtfully.

Erin wasn't the only one taking note of Jay's attention. Kim and Hank both seemed to spend an inordinate amount of time watching Jay and Erin than she felt was necessary. Hank seemed to be watching with curiosity at Jay's interest in Daniel, or more correctly Daniel's interest in Jay. "Jay, Jay, Jay," seemed to be one of Daniel's favorite new phrases. Daniel was constantly trying to capture his attention, and Jay seemed pleased to give it to him. Hank seemed to be quite interested in their interactions and Erin had to admit the scene was pretty heart-warming. Hank's smile was bittersweet. If he was thinking the same things that Erin was, then he was thinking about Justin. It was sad knowing that Daniel was going to grow up without a father. Erin appreciated the effort that Jay was making towards being a male role model for Daniel. He would probably need a lot of those with growing up without a dad.

Kim's attention wasn't so much on Daniel as on Jay. It seemed every time Erin and Jay met eyes, she'd see that Kim was watching with interest. She kept throwing raised eyed knowing glances at Erin. Erin was completely regretting telling her about the proposal and everything else. She knew it was going to be hard to keep her friend from wanting to gossip about her and Jay. Erin just imagined hours of teasing coming her way. The thing was, Erin didn't really know what to say about the relationship. Where would they go after today?

….

It had been a great night. After dinner, everyone had hung around the living room for quite a while, just talking and having a relaxing time. Hank had been the first one to duck out. While he enjoyed spending time with his team under circumstances that weren't work related, he was aware that he was their boss. Nobody really relaxed when their boss was in the room. Olinskly and Michelle left a few minutes later as well. Erin had been able to put Daniel to sleep in the bedroom, and then joined everyone else for drinks and dessert. Will had bought the makings for Irish coffee and played bartender for bit while everyone indulged in the selection of desserts. Will and Jay had shown abundant enthusiasm for Erin's homemade pumpkin cheesecake, and Erin had been inwardly delighted that she had made it for the Halstead brothers.

It was getting close to ten when Dawson and Sylvie started making noises about leaving. From the sly looks they kept passing back and forth, Erin suspected their night might just be beginning. Erin had every intention of giving her a call in the morning to harass her about this latest development. After all the teasing Erin had received the last few years about her relationships, she was glad to finally have some ammunition for some payback. Once Dawson and Sylvie started getting their jackets on, Kim, Adam, and Will started to head for the door, too. Erin walked everyone to the door, fully aware that Jay lingered alone in the kitchen.

Kim gave Erin a big hug at the door, "Thank you again for having us all over. When my mom decided to visit her sister in Colorado for Thanksgiving, I was worried about not having anywhere to go since I only had today off. Today was perfect though. It felt like family still."

Erin hugged her back tightly, "Cause we all are family."

Kim gave her an encouraging smile as she slipped her coat on. She leaned close, her voice low. "Talk to him." Her eyes almost were pleading, "Be nice, too. It's still Thanksgiving."

Erin gave her a slight nod. She was going to try. She didn't know what she was going to say, but Jay basically pulled off Thanksgiving single handedly. She felt she owed him that much. Not to mention, his obvious care for Daniel. When he'd held Daniel in his arms after the accident, it was clear Jay's concern for him was just as strong as her own. Because Daniel mattered to Erin, he mattered to Jay. Erin knew he was all in, and she had to think about what that meant. It's not that she didn't care about what had happened, but maybe she was ready to put it behind them. Calling out her final goodbyes, she shut the door behind her last guests. Besides Jay that is.

Making her way back into the living room, she looked over at Jay who was rinsing dishes at the sink. He gave her a quick glance before continuing with his chore.

Erin leaned against the kitchen counter, watching him wash and dry one of the serving platters. "Jay, you don't need to do that."

He shrugged but continued drying, "I'm just helping with dishes." He gave a quick glance to the pile near the sink. "There's still quite a mess."

"I know, but I can do them. You cooked the turkey and basically everything else. You shouldn't have to clean up, too." Erin didn't mean for her voice to have a tone of irritation, but it did. It wasn't irritation at him, however, but at herself. She felt guilty that he had felt obligated into cooking the entire holiday meal.

Jay tossed the dish towel onto the edge of the sink and walked over to his side of the kitchen bar. He leaned against it as well. They stood there for a moment, both eyeing the other. "I was just trying to help you out today."

She could tell by the tone in his voice, that his feelings were hurt. She felt bad immediately, "I appreciated it. I did." She gave him a light smile, "Maybe not at the beginning, but it was helpful that you were here. I'm not sure I would have gotten it all done by myself. So, thank you."

Jay gave a quick look over his shoulder at the pile of dishes that still needed to be cleaned, "Well, maybe after we finish cleaning, we can talk for a bit." She saw a dash of hope in his eyes, and she wavered, but she knew she was just emotionally drained. Bringing everything up, sharing all the thoughts that had been occupying her mind for the last two days, would be too much. She didn't think she was in the right frame of mind for that conversation.

Erin sighed, and she saw Jay note her response. Disappoint flared on his face. "It's just been a long day, Jay. I'm exhausted. I don't think I'm up for it."

He looked at her for another moment, before dipping his head a bit. Erin could tell he was disheartened. He let out a deep breath. "Okay, then. I guess I'll just go." Jay moved out of the kitchen and headed toward the door. He pulled his coat off the rack and started to pull on his jacket.

Erin knew she couldn't just let him walk away. She quickly followed him, and placed her hands on his arms. "Wait, Jay. I…" she paused for a moment, looking up into his eyes. She didn't know how to express what she wanted to say. She wanted to let him know she wasn't mad anymore, but some hurt still lingered. She wanted him to know that she still had doubts, but never doubted his love. There was so much she wanted to say, yet no words formed. Instead, she just pushed forward and wrapped her arms around him tightly. He stood still, possibly stunned, for a few seconds before reciprocating the hug. Erin felt him bury his face in her hair and breathe deeply. His hands were firm on her back, and Erin relaxed in his embrace. It embarrassed her a bit how safe she always felt when he held her in his arms. She allowed the moment to continue for almost a minute, both seemed to be just content in the contact. Then Jay's hand slowly started to slide down her back, following the curve of her spine. She could feel his warm breath against her ear, and he pulled back just a bit, to allow his lips to graze its sensitive shell.

"I didn't say anything earlier, but you look amazing in this dress." His whispered words and the heat of his mouth sent shivers down her spine.

Erin started to pull back, "Thanks, but-"

"Wait, Erin. Just wait." Erin leaned back a bit, so she could look up at him. His eyes weren't filled with the desire she thought she would see, but they were penetrating. "We don't have to talk, but can you just listen to me for a minute." He took a deep breath. "I've been thinking about everything all last night and all day today, and I just need to tell you what I'm feeling. You don't have to say anything. Just listen."

His eyes were pleading, borderline desperate, and truthfully, getting into Jay's head on the situation just might give Erin the perspective she needed. She bit her lip lightly and nodded. "Okay," she softly responded.

"Okay," Jay nodded. He let out a huge breath of surprise, as if he hadn't thought she'd agree to listen. "Okay." He repeated a light smile crossed his lips.

One of his hands moved from its resting place on her back to gently stoke her hair. Lightly caressing the curling waves before tucking one stray lock behind her ear. He allowed the back of his hand to graze her cheek before finally coming to rest on the back of her neck. His gentle touch sent her heart racing. Jay's touch always had.

"I've lived my life without you, Erin. I now know that it's not something I want. I want you in my life." His grip on her neck tightened slightly. "I want to be with you. Forever, if you'll have me, but just for now if that's all you want."

Erin sucked in a shaky breath at the word forever. It was such a foreign idea to her. To decide on forever with such a long future ahead of them. Yet, it didn't scare her as much as it might have a few months ago. She'd lived life without Jay, too, and it hadn't been the life she'd wanted.

His hand once again was on the move, brushing her cheek and his thumb lightly stroking her lower lip. It trembled slightly, and Erin knew that it was taking a lot for Jay to hold back his emotions as well. His voice was low and rough sounding, "If all you want is friendship, I will take that. I'll be your friend, your best friend. I will show you that you can trust me and that I will never hurt you again. I'll wait for you. Forever if I have to. I'm sorry I didn't before, but this time I know what I'm waiting for, and I know it's worth it."

Erin just looked up at him wide-eyed, relieved he had asked her just to listen because she knew that if she even tried to speak, she would probably be an incoherent mess of emotions and tears. Even still, she could feel that her eyes were watery and that familiar sting of tears burned her eyes.

Jay's eyes scanned her face, noting the tears. Both hands reached up to gently cup her cheeks. His head dipped down and his lips touched hers in the sweetest and lightest kiss. The pressure of his lips, the heat of his mouth, electrifying like the strike of lightning. The moment was all too brief, and he had pulled back before Erin could even process the kiss or his words. "Whenever and forever, Erin. I am yours."

Releasing her, he took a step back, his hand reaching for the door knob. Erin still standing, stunned, just a step away. "When you are ready to talk, I'm there." His deep eyes gave her one more soul searching look, before he slipped out the door and quietly shut it behind him.

Erin didn't know how long she even stood there. One hand resting on her lips, the other on her heart. The two parts of her body that Jay easily possessed. Only her brain still hesitated. Despite his declaration, there was still a lot they needed to discuss. A part of her knew their reunion was inevitable, but she appreciated that Jay was willing to give her the time and space she needed. The idea of reuniting with Jay, sent her heart racing again. A smile found its way to her face. They were going to figure out a way to make it work. She suddenly just knew it. Somehow, someway, they were going to find the common ground they needed to rebuild their relationship.

Erin ran her fingers through her hair as she walked back into the kitchen. She was now energized and actually thought for just a second about racing after him. If only Daniel wasn't fast asleep in her bedroom. Erin regretted that she hadn't taken Hank up on his offer to take him for the night. There was still tomorrow though. Erin knew that Jay was off tomorrow as well. She already started thinking about his reaction, when she might show up. Maybe she'd bring him breakfast. He'd surprised her with his early morning arrival today, maybe she'd reciprocate tomorrow. Her and Daniel could surprise him with coffee and donuts. Maybe they'd spend the morning at the park. If they felt brave, they could hit a few local stores and check out the sales.

Erin cheerily started finishing up the dishes that Jay had almost completed earlier. She felt so ridiculous because she couldn't keep the smile off her lips. Suddenly, her phone that sat on the table rang. A huge grin lit up her face. It seemed she wasn't the only one who just couldn't wait to begin the next step of their relationship. Grabbing the phone, she didn't even glance at the name, and just pressed the green answer button.

"Hello," she cheerfully answered.

There was a long silent pause. Erin pulled back and looked at the number. It said 'unknown.'

"Hello?" She repeated to the silence, confusion in her voice.

"Erin, it's Olive."

Author's Note: I don't want to alarm anyone, but the end is coming near for this story. I've got maybe four chapters left. I know everyone has wanted Jay and Erin to reunite, but since that moment is coming soon, that also means the end of the story is coming soon. I'll need some story ideas by the end of the month I think. While I've enjoyed Season 4, it hasn't sparked any story ideas for me.

Enjoy reading, and please review!