COLORLESS LOVE
Anara is an orphan girl. Her father and mother died when Anara was 9 years old. Meanwhile, his twin brothers Afdhal Alif Fikrie and Akhtar Alfi Faizal are only 3 years old. At that time, Anara's parents would go to the market to sell. Anara's father is a chicken seller in the market, while Anara's mother is a vegetable trader. As usual, Anara's father and mother left the house early in the morning. They went around 2 am to get fresh vegetables from the wholesaler. And broiler chickens directly from breeders. That night it rained lightly, soaking the earth, causing the road to be slippery and Anara's father's eyesight to blur. Anara's father lost his balance, which caused the motorbike he was riding with his wife to roll over. Instantly, the motorbike hit the large truck in front of it, which caused Anara's father and mother to fall and get under the truck that was passing by. The bodies of Anara's father and mother were run over by a truck, so that their lives could no longer be saved and they died at the scene. Anara and her two younger twins Alif and Alfi are now orphans and live with their grandmother who loves them very much. Living in a shack house with her grandmother and her twin siblings does not make Anara feel humiliated and inferior. Anara grows into a beautiful girl who is smart, independent, smart, and also strong. In order to support her three grandchildren, Grandma Azizah sells yellow rice and various kinds of cheap fried foods in front of her house. Anara, who doesn't want to burden Grandma Azizah, sometimes helps Grandma Azizah by selling wet cakes that she makes herself. The knowledge that Anara got from her mother during her lifetime was really useful for her. Anara is good at making various cakes and various kinds of home cooking. Usually Anara will sell her cakes at school, offering them to her friends and teachers. After returning home from school, Anara returned with her wares to go around the village. After it's finished, then Anara will come home with the money from her merchandise.
Chapter 23
Dinner at Grandma Azizah's house this time was normal, so cold and quiet. If usually Neo would be fussy asking this and that to Grandma Azizah, Alif, and also Alfi. This time Neo was more silent.
Neo's changes are of concern to Grandmother Azizah, while Anara herself is not affected by Neo's changes. Even Anara knows very well that Neo is really talkative and seems cold to anyone.
"Neo!" Azizah's grandmother opened her voice.
The summoned Neo didn't respond. He just kept stirring his food without intending to put it in his mouth.
"Brother Neo, why?" asked Alif.
"Who knows!" Alfi shrugged.
"Just one more time!" said Anara.
"Husss! You are!" interrupted Grandma Azizah.
Neo really didn't pay attention to his surroundings, even when Grandma Azizah talked about herself and her three grandchildren, Neo didn't respond at all. That makes Grandma Azizah even more worried about Neo.
"After you eat. Call Grandpa Badrun here! We asked Grandfather Badrun what happened to Neo." Grandma Azizah said slowly.
"Okay, Grandma!" replied Alif and Alfi in unison.
After dinner, Anara cleaned up the plates, glasses and spoons they used to eat. Anara washes all the cutlery herself, without the help of Grandma Azizah and the twins Alif and Alfi and Neo.
"Let me do it myself. You guys just rest first, while Belia is sleeping soundly I can take care of all this myself." Anara refuses when Grandma Azizah tries to help her.
As promised, Alif and Alfi call Grandfather Badrun to his house, to talk about important matters with Grandma Azizah regarding Neo's change in attitude after returning to fish in the river.
"Do you know why Neo daydreams like that, Badrun?" asked Grandma Azizah who was currently sitting on a chair in front of the terrace of her house, while Neo sat down a bit away from Grandma Azizah and Grandpa Badrun accompanied by Alif and Alfi.
"Looks like Neo is heartbroken at the moment." answered Grandfather Badrun.
"Broken hearted? Who is the girl who broke Neo's heart, Badrun?" asked Grandma Azizah.
"Your grandson!" answered Grandfather Badrun.
"Haaah? my grandson? Anara, you mean?" Grandma Azizah asked in disbelief.
"Who else? Really Alif or Alfi!" Grandpa Badrun chuckled.
"How do you know that Neo is heartbroken because of Anara, Badrun? Don't make it up to you!" said Grandma Azizah.
"This afternoon I challenged him to catch a big fish that would make Anara happy. I don't think Neo would have done that if he didn't love Anara, that's why Neo came home to bring big fish for Anara. This afternoon I heard everything, Anara and Neo talking behind. So I know how Neo feels right now." said Grandpa Badrun.
"Then what should I do to make Neo happy again and not gloomy like that?" asked Grandma Azizah worriedly.
"You take Alif and Alfi to bed first! Let me talk one-on-one with Neo. After I'm sure Neo loves Anara, then I'll think about how to make Anara fall in love and like Neo." Grandpa Badrun's suggestion.
"It's up to you, Badrun! I don't want to bother! My grandson still doesn't understand love, that's why he's acting normal to Neo!" said Grandma Azizah.
"I will be responsible for making Anara understand and know Neo's feelings. There already bring Alif and Alfi in!" Grandpa Badrun ordered.
Azizah's grandmother then asked Alif and Alfi to sleep immediately, remembering that tomorrow at dawn they have to get up early because they will have the first sahur meal at the beginning of the month of Ramadan tomorrow.
"What are you doing, young man? Doesn't seem excited! Does your body hurt after catching a big fish this afternoon?" asked Grandfather Badrun who had already sat down and moved closer to Neo near the front porch steps of Grandma Azizah's house.
"I'm fine, Grandpa!" replied Neo lazily.
"Your mouth can lie! But your eyes can't, Neo! Your body language shows the contents of your heart that is disappointed and heartbroken. Why? Did Anara reject your proposal, hem?" Grandfather Badrun's question spontaneously made Neo turn his head.
"Grandpa can do it! Where is my broken heart I'm just tired, Grandpa." Neo replied lying.
"You can lie to your own feelings, Neo! But you can't lie to Grandpa. Tell me what must Grandpa do so that Anara reciprocates your feelings? Do you have to be frank with Anara on behalf of you expressing feelings for Anara?" asked Grandpa Badrun.
Neo froze in silence when he heard Grandpa Badrun's words. This middle-aged man seemed to understand Neo's current anxiety. I don't know since when did Neo feel the anxiety in his heart when he remembered everything about Anara.
"Since when did you feel the feeling of falling in love with Anara?" asked Grandpa Badrun.
"I don't know since when I don't know, Grandpa! What is certain is that at this time my feelings for Anara have deepened and it is difficult to let go again. That's why I was so disappointed when I found out, Anara only thought of me as an older sister. I accidentally caught a big fish with I worked hard all for the sake of making Anara happy, and to be able to love me for who I am. I hope Anara can accept me not as a Neo child of a conglomerate like my Dad. I want Anara to love me as Neo, a simple man who can live happily without wealth, but can love a girl named Anara completely. My love doesn't need wealth, but it needs a warm welcome from a girl I really love and that is Anara." Said Neo frankly.
"What is your purpose in coming all the way to this house because you want to show your love for Anara, by not seeing who Anara really is?" asked Grandpa Badrun convincingly.
"Yes, Grandpa! I'm willing to live modestly for the sake of Anara. Because so far I have always lived as it is and away from my family. I choose to live with my friends in a boarding house, rather than living on wealth which always makes my heart empty and unhappy." Neo said.
"Why? other people actually want to live happily with wealth, you actually reject it all." Ask Grandpa Badrun.
"Wealth alone is not enough, Grandpa! I just need affection and love from a girl I love. My life has been suffering since my mother and sister died a few years ago, now I only have Belia. That is the reason I can survive, all because of Belia." Neo said with teary eyes.
"If your Mom has died a long time ago, then her Mrs. Sonya?" asked Grandfather Badrun, not continuing his words.
"Mom Sonya is my Daddy's second wife. My mother died shortly after giving birth to my Brother Atha. At that time, I didn't want Atha to feel sad and broken, just like I did when I had to lose Mommy. For this reason, when Atha was only one year old, I asked Daddy to marry Mom Sonya." Neo took a deep breath.
"I asked Daddy and Mom Sonya to keep Mom Sonya's status a secret from Atha and other people. In fact, I am even willing to consider Mom Sonya as my biological mother for Atha's sake. No one else knows about this, only me, Daddy, Mom Sonya, Mbok Ijah, and the late Sis. Arsyila, the woman who gave birth to Belia into this world." Neo couldn't help but cry.
"Sis Arsyila's fate is the same as Mom's. Shortly after giving birth to Belia's baby, Sis Arsyila died due to loss of blood due to bleeding before giving birth. Sis Arsyila fell while chasing Rudi, her husband, who was caught having an affair with another woman. That's why I always kept Belia's baby away from Rudi, her biological father, Sarah, and also Mom Sonya. I only believe in Anara who always sincerely loves her baby." Now Neo's face was very wet with tears.
Test…
Without Neo and Grandpa Badrun knowing, since earlier Anara had been listening to all the stories that Neo had told Grandpa Badrun. Currently Anara was crying behind the door and hiding her tiny body there.
There is a feeling of guilt in Anara's heart, remembering her sometimes annoyed attitude towards Neo. Due to her ignorance, Anara sometimes keeps her distance from Neo. In fact, consciously and deliberately, Anara was once close to Rudi and Sarah.
"I'm sorry, Brother!" Anara whispered before finally leaving where she was standing at the moment, because she saw that Grandfather Badrun had come home and Neo was about to enter the house.
Anara closed her bedroom door very slowly. Seeing Belia fast asleep, Anara rushed to embrace the tiny body of Belia's baby. Anara kissed Belia's baby's face repeatedly, causing her to stretch her body and occasionally smile during her sleep.
"Anara! Are you sleeping?" whispered Neo behind Anara's bedroom door, and of course Anara didn't hear it.
Azizah's grandmother, who saw this, discouraged her from going to the kitchen with a drink. at this time Grandma Azizah was thirsty and was about to take drinking water to the kitchen. However, his steps stopped when he saw Neo sitting leaning against the door of Anara's bedroom.
"Poor Neo! But what can I do? I can't force Anara to love a man she already considers a big brother. Moreover, Anara also seems not ready to have a serious relationship with any man." Grandma Azizah muttered on her bed.
Azizah's grandmother had to hold back her thirst because she didn't want to embarrass Neo, because she found the man silent at Anara's door.
"Anara! I really love you. Isn't there a hint of that feeling growing in your heart for me, Anara?" whispered Neo behind Anara's bedroom door.
While Anara, who was in her room, was currently hugging her baby with feelings of guilt towards Neo. But, Anara confused with her own feelings at this time.
Anara never fell in love with anyone. Since she was at school, Anara has had many male friends, but Anara has never felt love. Moreover, Anara used to always close herself off from anyone because she felt inferior about her family situation.
Anara doesn't want to excuse herself who is an orphan, makes men look down on him and look down on himself and his family. Many men like Anara, but Anara never responds.
Likewise, when Anara knows and is close to Neo. Anara always closes herself not to fall in love with Neo. Anara doesn't want to hurt herself by falling in love with Neo, especially since their family is like heaven and earth.
"Mamamamama… dadadadadada…" Belia's baby babbling interrupted Anara's reverie.
"Honey, are you awake? Would you like some milk?" Anara asked the baby Belia.
As if understanding the baby, Belia smiled sweetly showing her new teeth. Anara was excited to see the baby Belia and kissed the baby's chubby cheeks.
"Let's make milk first!" Anara then got up to the table in the room.
Anara saw that the water in the thermos was empty and Anara had forgotten to fill it this afternoon. anara was forced to carry a thermos and a bottle of milk to the kitchen with a young baby in her arms using a cloth.
Anara was surprised not to play when she opened the door to her room. Neo, who was leaning against the door, woke up when Anara opened the door.
"Brother?" Anara was surprised.
"Anara!" Neo was nervous to see the expression on Anara's face.