Uncomfortable

I let out a sigh as I sat with my back against Roku's statue. "They're coming soon, your successor," I told him with a sigh. I didn't know how I knew, I just did. I could feel it.

"Fuck, Roku, give me a pep talk... please?" I was nervous, more nervous that I thought I would be. All that excitement at meeting them had gone down the drain, and anxiety filled me.

How would they react to me? I was a foul mouthed individual. I hadn't washed in months. I...

I didn't even know how my own face looked. Because if I did, it would just... confirm that I wasn't ME anymore, or at least, not in my body. I brushes my hands through my greasy, long hair. It reached a bit past my shoulders, never had I once considered cutting it.

'When you're in a new world with magical powers, you tend to forget about hair and all that...' I rationalized to myself. But in all honesty, I just didn't care. It wasn't my body after all, why should I care how it looked?

If I cared, then that meant...

'What does it mean?' I asked myself. Did it mean that I accepted this life now? That I moved on?

'No, that's not it, I just...' I frowned. 'I'm depressed,' I accepted. That's all there was to it. I just didn't feel like taking care of myself. There was also the fear of being face to face with the person who's body I took over.

"That certainly wouldn't be traumatizing, huh Roku?" I nudged the statue with my elbow.

'But... maybe, once I see my face that might get rid of depersonalization? It makes me feel like I'm not in my body, and maybe that's because I still haven't accepted that this IS my body now?' That was something to think about.

I looked at the scars covering my arms. The product of grinding some skills.

"I guess I should... wash up. I need to at least be presentable," I murmured.

With that being said, I took out a bucket and began filling it with water from bottles I had in my inventory. It's unfortunate, but I couldn't just store water without a container in my inventory. If that was the case, I might've had a harder time choosing between being a Waterbender or an Airbender.

Grabbing a clean rag, I began wiping my body down. The cold, still air prickled at wherever the rag passed as it slid over my skin.

Once I was finished, I set it down and then started training once more. I was only doing so to calm myself down.

I didn't know anybody who considered training calming, but at this point, going through the motions had almost become second nature to me. Though I had conflicting emotions regarding. Some part of me hoped to use it on someone, because if I didn't what was the point of training so much? And another part hoped I'd never have to use it.

...

Now that Aang and the rest were going to be here soon, I needed to come up with a reason for why I was here. 'I guess I'll just say my ancestor was an Air Nomad or something,' I thought.

Air Nomads were wanderers. They went from place to place, it's not like a one night stand was impossible. 'Yes, my ancestor was an Air Nomad and I'm an Airbender, and I hail from the Earth Kingdom.'

A good story I'd say.

...

Light burst forth from a crevice that slowly grew as the doors slowly opened. The darkness I had gotten so used to, receded as it hid from the light.

"Hello? Anybody home?" My movements paused, and air got caught in my throat as my body stiffened.

Taking in deep breaths, I calmed myself and began going through the motions again. I closed my eyes and cooled my head.

"Uhm, are you the one I'm supposed to meet?" I heard him ask. Opening my eyes, I saw a bald kid, a fifteen year old holding his club with both hands, eyeing me warily, and a girl.

"I wouldn't say you were supposed to meet me, exactly," I started, "But I have been waiting for you, Avatar"

"You... know me? Who are you?"

"Yeah! Who are you? How do you know about Aang!? Explain yourself!" Sokka backed him up.

"I'm just someone who got stuck in here," I explained with a shrug. I looked away from them, the emotions I was feeling disappearing as they were out of sight.

Familiarity. Comfort. Joy.

A lot of things my {Emotional Detachment} didn't want me feeling. I stared Roku.

"He's probably the one you're supposed meet," I told them, gesturing towards the statue of Aang's previous incarnation. With that, I began walking towards the now open doors.

"You guys should explore the rest of the temple, I'll be outside if you need me. Haven't seen the sun in who knows how long."

"Hey, you-" Katara placed a hand on Sokka's shoulder.

"Katara! Why are you stopping me? We can't trust him! We don't know who he is, he could be from the fire nation for all we know!"

"I don't think he's-" Aang began, but I interrupted him as I shouted from outside the door, "If you want to know come find me! After you're done exploring the temple, of course."

"Yeah... of course," Sokka murmured to himself, rolling his eyes.

...

'Hm. My hearing is pretty good. I could hear him even all the way out here,' I noted that to myself. PER must really be doing work.

With a groan, I had to wait a little while for my eyes to adjust to the bright, cloud covered sky. The white snow all around wasn't helping with that endeavour. Sighing, I sat down on the stairs of the monastery.

'I actually talked to them. They're... real.' It was indescribable. Completely outlandish. But at this point, I couldn't even be shocked or surprised. I've expected it since day one.

Eventually, I heard Aang jumping down from a balcony, chasing after what I assumed to be Momo. The distant shouts of Sokka screaming meat entered my ears, and I slightly smiled.

'I always thought that scene with all the Avatar statues eyes glowing was pretty cool.' Too bad I wouldn't get to see it.

Then, I felt it. The wind picking up, swirling violently. I could tell what was happening. Katara and Sokka would calm Aang down after learning his entire home had been slaughtered.

'We're your new family, huh?' I thought back on what Katara said which eventually did the trick.

...

The first thing Aang did when he saw me again, was bow.

"Aang...?" Katara asked softly. He didn't say anything, still bowing. But eventually, he stopped and looked at me.

"You're the one who buried them, aren't you?" he stated.

"Yeah... I may not have known them, but it was the least I could do," I said.

"Thank you, for that, I mean."

"Alright, alright! Hold your thanks Aang. So, mister shirtless guy, why was it the least you could do exactly?" Sokka inquired, squinting at me.

"Well, we're sort of related." I said nothing else as I raised my palm. Air began swirling into a ball, floating above my hand.

"After all, I'm an Airbender." Before I knew it, I was cheekily grinning at their dumbfounded faces.

...

We all decided it'd be better to talk on the road. So all of us were on Appa in a circle as the bison flew through the sky. It wasn't a bad experience.

"So one of your ancestors was an Airbender?!" Aang said excitedly, very happy to learn that he wasn't the last one.

"Yup. And once I found out I could... well, Bend, I decided to make my way to the Southern Air Temple. I decided to wait here, hoping one day you'd show up," I elaborated.

"Wait, but why come here? Instead of just staying home?" Katara asked, confused.

"The fire nation would..." I slid my thumb over my throat, "You know?"

"Oh, right, that was... stupid to ask."

"Yeah, well, I decided the safest place for an Airbender would be at an Air Temple. It'd be right under their noses. Especially since the fire nation stopped sending patrols here decades ago, from what I've heard at least," I explained to them.

"Makes sense," Sokka agreed.

"But, are you sure you want to come with us? We're going to be fighting Ozai," Katara said, concerned. Aang nodded, agreeing with her.

"With just the three of you?" I asked with a raised brow.

"We have Appa and Momo to-" I interrupted Aang.

"Yeah, no. You guys are gonna need all the help you can get. Plus, while I may not follow the Air Nomads traditions, being an Airbender myself... it sort of feels like I have a responsibility to at least help stop him. You understand, right Aang?" He agreed with me, it was rather reluctant though.

I could tell he'd rather have me anywhere but with him fighting Ozai. After all, if he dies and I die... no more Airbenders. None. Nada. Zilch.

Unfortunately I wouldn't be doing what he hoped. When have I cared for others opinions since coming here?

"Okay, I'm done talking for now. I'm gonna sleep," I told them as I yawned.

"In the middle of the day?"

"Yup." I didn't bother explaining that your sense of time gets warped when there's no sun and moon.

...

I lied in my sleeping bag, drowning out the sound of their voices as I focused on the air. I calmed myself, clearing my head.

'Kyoshi Island is up next... should I kill the giant Koi fish?' I pondered.

'I guess I should see what Level it is before deciding anything.' Aang was level fifty-six, Katara twenty-seven, Sokka twenty-four.

'So if Aang's level fifty with just Airbending, doesn't that mean he'll be around two hundred once he's mastered all four elements?' I wondered. But I wouldn't be able to answer that now, all I could do was wait and see.

'...'

'It's weird,' I thought. I was comfortable and yet, at the same time, I felt out of place. I was part of the Gaang. But was I really? I didn't know these people. I only knew the characters. It felt off.

'They won't become my new family,' I told myself. Nobody could replace them.

Nobody.

I also realized something else as I rested there. 'I've been lying smoothly to them this entire time.' I didn't even feel bad about it.

Was this... another way of me emotionally distancing myself from people?

'If it is, well... It's working.'

My ancestor wasn't an Airbender. I didn't feel obligated to defeat Ozai. The only thing I said that was close to the truth, was me burying every corpse. It WAS the least I could do, since they practically taught me how to Airbend with the scroll they left behind.

"Ha... wow," I laughed.

I'm such a piece of shit, aren't I?

...

It was night, and I was wide awake. The nap during the day didn't help me sleep. I was practicing Airbending, going through the motions, and I finally realized why I liked training Airbending, or just training in general, so much.

It was simple. I didn't need to think. I didn't need to worry. It made me feel...

Training made me feel in tune with this body. I couldn't quite describe it. It felt like when I trained, this was my body. Weird, right? I know. I knew I wasn't at a good place, mentally, and training just made me forget about that. Was that healthy? I'd like to think so, at least.

'The sun's rising...' I had been up all night, without even realizing it.