Illicit Affair

Nikita put her hand on my back and gave it a gentle, caressing massage. She continued to tenderly rub my back with her palm. I gently wiped the tears from my eyes. I will do all in my power to avoid breaking down in front of her and revealing how fragile I am. But I was unable to contain my emotions any longer and had to express myself. I am really self-conscious about the way my appearance looks. It's possible that she thinks that I weep a lot because of my situation now. I can't stop the gust of my emotions. Right now, I have a lot of frustration directed against my mother. And I can't hide it anymore from Nikita's curious eyes.

"When I questioned her about why she had done it, she stated that she did it because he was her first love. The reason for me is just too simplistic, wouldn't you agree?" I turned to her in the hopes of gaining her sympathy and said that it might not be such a bad thing that I felt awful because of my mother's stupid logic. I believe that because Mom wants everyone on the island to talk about her, she did it without giving any second thought to whether or not it was ethical. In addition to this, she is no longer ashamed of what the opinions and comments of other people may be. "Despite my best efforts, I am still not capable of fully understanding the situation. Even if it's her first love, she doesn't show any respect for my dad, who is also her husband. It's not there anymore. It's gone, just like that."

My eyes filled up with tears until all my emotions escaped and showed on my face. I don't care what I look like now. My frustration became impossible to conceal any longer, as I was about to explode.

"That was her first love, but isn't it fair that she is now married to my dad? She was quite unfair. Mom didn't even respect that in any way. Because of her first love, I can't stop wondering if she cheated on Dad or was already having an illicit affair when he was still living with us. I can't stop thinking about it. And now that Dad is gone, does she have the guts to bring her first love home? Whoa! Can you imagine that, Nikita? She brought her first love into the house that belonged to my dad." I added to show my disappointment at what my mother did.

I buried my face in my hands. I can't really fathom all the problems I'm facing. Without saying a single word, Nikita continued to rub my back to make me feel better. I am aware that she feels sorry for me in this way. Many people have said that you can tell who your true friends are by how they treat you when you're in need or going through a difficult time.And I can say that Nikita is one of them.

"Do you have any idea, Nikita, what it was that got me so worked up with my mother? My next revelation is something that you didn't want to believe at all, just like my reaction." I murmured, with my eyes brimming with disdain and animosity for my mom. "The two of them just got married without my knowledge. Can you hear me? They are already married, and she also informed me that the man she married is the one she has always considered to be her husband and that I should start thinking of him as my father. Is it acceptable? Is she kidding me? Tell me honestly, Nikita. Am I wrong? Is it not possible for me to be frustrated by the decision that she made? Nikita, they have officially tied the knot, and what is even more infuriating is that Mom said to me that I need to start to move on from losing Dad because that's how short his life is. They didn't give me any consideration. That's making me more mad."

Nikita had just finished giving me a bear hug, which made me feel even more emotional at that moment. It was supposed to comfort me, but all it did was make my tears flow even more. My mind is racing with contradicting thoughts and feelings.

"This man is going to move in with us starting today and will start living in our home. The moment I laid eyes on his appearance, I knew I wouldn't get along with him. I am aware that I am acting immaturely, but I do not like to be in the same room as him or share the same air with him. I don't want him for my mom. They are not compatible with each other. And to think about it every day of my life—that he is living with us—makes my blood boil. I hate him! I will have as much hatred for him as I desire. He does not have my approval to be part of my life or my family."

"Amelia, do not even forget that I am just here in case you've forgotten that I exist. Poor girl. I can't even begin to imagine how distressing things must be for you, but I really hope that you'll be capable of enduring through it all and making it all the way to the end. Have no fear; I won't ever leave you in this battle. I'm here to hug you and express my sincere heart as one of your friends. If you sense the need to do so, you are more than welcome to cry and lean on my shoulders. Release all of the rage you possess. It's possible that your mother was being selfish when it came to keeping you in the dark about her intentions for the future, but let's be realistic here. It was no longer a figment of your imagination. It was now your reality and not only part of your dream at night."

"That's impossible to happen, Nikita."

"While it may seem impossible right now, I have faith that one day you will come to terms with everything, despite the fact that it may continue to cause you discomfort. You know why? That's because of love. You don't even feel it now, but one day you will forgive them, just as you learned and accepted how to love them as your parents. This forgiveness will come even though you don't feel it right now."