376. Chapter 376

After Always

Episode 4.23

By

UCSbdad

Disclaimer: Of course I always don't own Castle. Rating: K Time: See above.

Author's note: Andrew Marlowe said, at some point, that he doesn't believe in "soap opera dialogue". That is, where characters pour their hearts out to one another. So, I'm assuming that somewhere in their night of passion, Rick and Kate must have had a conversation something like the following. Or, maybe not.

Kate snuggled up against her husband as they walked to their bedroom. "You took your time getting me that John Woo marathon you promised me." She teased.

"The Killers and Hard Boiled?" Castle replied. "Kate, you can't just watch a John Woo movie. You need to prepare for it. You need to savor it, like a rare delicacy."

Kate looked up at him. "Is that Castle-ese for you completely forgot about your promise?"

"Pretty much." He admitted. He picked Kate up and set her down on their bed.

"I wonder what would have happened if we had had our John Woo marathon when we originally planned it? If things had gone differently."

"We would have gotten together eventually. I loved you, you knew it and you were almost ready."

Kate shook her head. "I wonder. I was taking forever to decide I could tell you what I wanted. I needed a good swift kick in the ass to get me to see what was right in front of me."

"You did not need a good kick in that magnificent ass of yours. Not one that almost got you killed." Castle got in bed with her and looked at the ceiling. "You almost got killed, Kate, and I'll never forgive myself for that. I never should have left you that night. I left the woman I love to face a murderous conspiracy."

Kate rolled into his arms. "Bullshit, Castle. Cedric Marks and Bracken are responsible for what happened to me. Hell, I'm responsible. I was the one that went all Dirty Harry. I should have listened to you. Montgomery was right. I went straight at them without thinking, just like they knew I would."

"Still, I never should have left you alone to face them. I should have accepted what you wanted to do and gone with you. I should have been with you."

"And what if you had gotten killed on that rooftop, Rick? That would have destroyed me. It would have been worse than anything else Bracken could have done. And before you start apologizing again, you apologized enough that night. I finally had to give your mouth something else to do besides talk."

He smirked. "Did it ever occur to you that was my plan?"

She slowly shook her head. "No. You were way too upset." She kissed him softly. "I still remember that night like it was yesterday."

Kate began to recall that night.

After their very first lovemaking, Rick had stroked Kate's hair and nuzzled her neck. "What did you mean you said you almost died?" He had asked her.

She explained about the fight that had left her hanging off of a roof.

"Oh, god! Kate, you can't do that anymore. Promise me you will never go anyplace without me if you're tracking down anyone who has anything to do with your mom's murder."

"I'll try, but you know enough about police work to know I can't absolutely promise that. Sometimes you just have to do something then and there. Besides, you're not a cop and you don't have a weapon."

"No, but I love you more than anything. Doesn't that count?"

"That makes me want you far away from these people as possible."

Rick gave her an odd look. "Kate, there's something you need to see." He had taken her hand and led her into his office. He grabbed a remote and turned on his electronic murder board. He retrieved something from the recycle bin. Suddenly Kate had seen that this was a murder board for her mom's case."

"Castle, what is this?"

"Our mystery man said you couldn't pursue your mom's case. No one ever said anything about me looking into it. So I did."

She had shaken her head. "Are you crazy?"

"Crazy in love with you."

She had had to smile at that. "I already knew you were crazy when we had our first case together. But these people aren't the kind that'll split hairs like that. This just puts you in the crosshairs with me."

"Which is exactly where I'd be anyway. Kate, I don't think it's that big a secret that I love you. Maybe you didn't notice, but a lot of other people did. And I'm sure our Dragon and his friends can figure it out as well. I'm a very wealthy man with lots of connections in…odd places. I really can be dangerous. If they killed you, they'd kill me, too. Or I'd kill Bracken."

Kate looked at the board. There were things there that she didn't know about. "What did you find out?"

"Nothing, really. I checked out the arson investigator, Halstead, a bit more thoroughly than you were able to. I couldn't find a thing. I had guy check his report. But he said there were no red flags."

"Castle, if you asked another arson investigator to check this, it'd get back to Halstead. If he was in on it, it'd lead them straight to you."

Rick had looked a bit embarrassed. "I used another kind of arson expert."

"What other kind of arson investigator is there?"

"I used an arsonist. He was a pro, did it for money, not for the thrill of it. And he was in prison when the fire occurred. I also asked him to ask around. See if anyone in the arson business had a big score about that time. He found nothing."

"He could have been lying."

"And the fire could have been an accident. We'll probably never know."

"Anything else?" She had asked.

"I checked out Bill Moss, the lawyer who represented Jordan Norris, the guy who set up Mayor Bob Weldon."

"Dare I ask how you checked him out?" Kate said with a slight grimace.

"I had his office and his home burglarized and his computer hacked. He got the request to represent Norris from a friend who got it from a somewhat shady lawyer who got an anonymous request and Moss was paid in cash. He even paid income taxes on it."

"At least you didn't have him sent to some third world police state and have him tortured." Kate had suddenly looked at Castle. "You didn't, did you?"

"No, but I wish I thought of it then. Let me make a note of that."

Kate had grabbed the remote. "No. Absolutely not."

Rick shrugged. "I guess that's that I get for falling in love with a cop."

Kate had blushed and stared at the ground. "Rick, I'm not a cop anymore." She had confessed.

"What? Did Gates fire you? I'll call my lawyers in the morning. She won't get away with that. I'll make sure that…."

"I resigned. I quit. That's why I'm not a cop."

"Kate? Why? You've been a cop all of your adult life? What about your mom's murder."

"Gates was only going to suspend me, but when I came back, she'd never have let me anywhere near Mom's case. And after what I did, One PP would have had to back her up. Even Mayor Weldon couldn't have helped."

Kate had put her arms around him, suddenly very conscious that they were still both naked. "But the main reason I quit was that I was tired of having a life that was about the past. I want a future, and I want that future to be with you."

"Do you have any plans for that future?" He had asked.

"I intend to spend a large part of the very near future making up for all the things I've done wrong in the past. I've put you through too much, waiting for me to get better. I need to make up for all that."

She shook her head, bringing her mind back to the present.

Kate lightly stroked her husband's chest. "And all of my great plans for us disappeared in a heartbeat. We found out who had ordered my mom's murder and we eventually got him."

"And here we are, Mr. and Mrs. Castle. We would have gotten here sooner or later. I could have handled it being later if it hadn't risked your life." Rick said.

"I often wonder." Kate said softly. "Suppose Joe Pulgatti gets a favorable reply from another lawyer and never writes to my mom. She lives, I stay at Stanford and become a lawyer. Would I have ever met Richard Castle? Would you have wanted to shadow some hyper-ambitious lawyer? Written a book about her? Probably not. I wonder if the Universe took away my mom's life and gave me my life with you?"

They were silent for a minute.

"The universe doesn't seem to be replying." Rick said.

"You never can trust the universe to fess up, can you?"

"I'll make a note to get a better universe for you."

"You would, wouldn't you?"

He kissed her. "Always."