354. Chapter 354

After Head Case

Episode 4.03

By

UCSBdad

Disclaimer: Only a head case would think I owned Castle. Rating: T Time: See above

As the doors of the elevator opened, all eyes turned to watch Kate Beckett as she walked through the bullpen to her desk. All of the men's eyes were drawn to her round, firm, melon shaped boobs, the upper halves of which were clearly visible above her low cut top. That she wore no bra was evident from the sight of her thick, long nipples poking out against the tight, sheer fabric of her blouse. She smiled to everyone. First Espo and then Ryan managed to draw their eyes back to their work, followed by the eyes of the other men and women in the bullpen. One exception was Rick Castle who had immediately averted his eyes and was staring at the floor.

Kate sat at her chair, crossing her long, slim, muscular legs, allowing her short tight skirt to ride up her thighs. She was sure that Castle could see her bright red panties if he'd only look. But his eyes darted from the floor to look her directly in the eyes.

"Um, Beckett. What happened?"

She smiled at him, leaning forward to afford him a better view. "You asked me the other day if I would get the implants. I asked you if you thought I needed them. You said you were talking the pharmaceutical implants for an increased life span. But you never indicated if you thought I should get the breast implants or not." Kate smiled and leaned forward. "What do you think of them? I got the double D cups."

Castle made a strangling sound in his throat. "You're always beautiful to me."

"That's sweet." She said, leaning forward to grab her coffee cup and rubbing one boob against Castle's arm. She then stood up, turned away from him and bent over to put something in the bottom drawer of her desk, putting the most glorious ass that Castle had ever seen within inches of his face. Castle managed to move backward slightly.

Kate turned around and then slid forward on her chair, then crossing her legs. This time she knew he could see her panties since she could clearly see the bright red cloth triangle as she looked down. "Like what you see?" She said in a low, sexy voice.

Castle took a deep breath. "Kate I love what I see. I've been in love with you since forever and I love you unconditionally, whether you've had breast implants or not. Kate, I love you. I love you, Kate."

Kate's eyes glowed with happiness. "Rick, I… l…"

Kate Beckett's eyes shot open and she stared at the ceiling of her bedroom. "What the hell was that?" She wondered out loud. Her eyes went to the alarm clock by her bedside. It was only a few minutes until the time that she normally woke up. However, today was her day off. She decided she was wide awake and might as well get up. She stripped off her Yankees tee shirt and NYPD running shorts. She noticed that the dream had affected her. She was quite wet.

She walked into her bathroom and examined herself in the mirror, trying to imagine herself with double D cup boobs. She shook her head. She couldn't see it. She examined herself more closely. I have a good face. My boobs are okay, although they've sagged just a bit since I was in my twenties. My stomach is nice and flat, although my surgical scars means I'll never be a bikini model. My best features and my legs…She turned around and looked at herself over her shoulder. "…and my ass.

She started her shower and wondered what the dream she had just had meant. I know that Castle loves me and I'll love him in turn when my wall is down. But why would I dream about a sexed up version of myself coming on to Castle? At least he didn't jump me right there in the bullpen. It suddenly occurred to Kate that that was exactly what she had wanted. She wanted Castle to make love to her.

She got into the shower. It's not like I never thought about it. When he first started shadowing me, I thought about going to bed with him just to get rid of him. I thought that once we'd slept together, he'd lose interest and go away. I'm glad I didn't do that now. I know he wouldn't have lost interest in me, but it would have changed the dynamics of our relationship. We might not be where we are now.

When did I realize we had a relationship? She asked herself as she started soaping her body. The Candela kidnapping. He volunteered to make the ransom drop. We were facing no one but a CPA that even Castle could have taken in a fight, but for all we knew, he might have been facing a ruthless gang who'd have killed him without a thought. The other times he'd had his life in danger, he'd just wandered into a dangerous situation, like with that Nigerian. This was the first time he cold bloodedly did something brave. It impressed me and made me think there was more to Castle than I had thought.

She began soaping her legs. Then there were the women. As much as I hated to admit it, I was jealous of Kyra, Meredith and Ellie Monroe. Castle was my partner and my friend, and I was determined that he would never be anything else. I pushed the feelings of jealousy down. But the heart wants what the heart wants. And he was jealous, too. Okay, I did enjoy his jealousy of Tom Demming. Screw some actress who's only interested in you for a part, will you, Writer Boy? How do you like it when I do it? Of course, I tried to tell myself he was just jealous of Tom taking his place on my team. Right up until I screwed up his invitation to go to the Hamptons. What would have happened if I'd spoken up earlier? I'm sure he wouldn't have tried to get me in bed. He was interested in me by then and not just as another conquest. Kate smiled, imagining herself walking into Rick's bedroom completely naked. I'm sure Castle would have tried to be a gentleman, for a short while. But who's going to resist a good looking naked woman wanting into your bed? Richard Castle? No way. Where would we be if only I'd…She shook her head slowly. I can ask myself stupid questions like that forever and get nowhere.

The kiss. Kate was working on her feet and toes. Even though I was with Josh, I wanted him and I wanted him badly that night. But I convinced myself it meant nothing. He was with Gina and I was with Josh. I had more chances to tell him how I felt after he broke up with Gina, but I couldn't quite manage it.

She went to work on her back. I was positive before I was shot that he loved me, but now he's come right out and told me. And I lied to him. I cannot ever let him know that. I can get through this, break down my wall and be with Castle. I just need time.

She got out of the shower and started drying herself with a large towel. She smiled at her reflection in the mirror. I can do this.

She walked out into her bedroom and checked the time. I wonder what Castle's doing right now? She shook her head sharply. No! I can't think like that. All I need is time.