35. Chapter 35

AN: More chapter. Also, I've been getting a lot of comments from people who've been enjoying the whole 'Samzilla' development. Which I love, but is also really amusing because like so many things in this story, it was supposed to be a one-off joke and ended up developing into its own thing. To people who'd like to see more of that kind of thing, and may not already be aware, I wrote another story called Gigant, which is a slightly more serious take on that sort of concept, but in the context of an actual superhero story, not a tabletop game. Sam's not in the story yet, but she'll show up eventually.

"Bring it on, Loud!" Sam snarled, rising to her feet.

Lynn's lip curled into a sneer as she climbed onto her chair. Her powerful leg muscles coiling, not unlike those of a jungle cat's, as she prepared to pounce at her prey.

"Wait!" Screeched Leni, causing both girls to stumble as her shrill cry cut through the tension in the room like a hot knife through butter.

The fashionista flounced over to Lynn, the younger girl's current vantage point conveniently putting the pair more or less at eye level. Lynn turned to the older girl, presumably to ask why she'd interrupted this confrontation that had been a long time coming, when Leni reached out, grabbed hold of Lynn's leotard, and—

RIP!

Literally tore her a new one. More specifically, a hole in the top of her garment, more or less matching the boob window that Sam had taken developed a taste for as of late.

"Leni!" Lynn shrieked. Her demeanor had completely changed. Whereas Lynn had previously been proud and confident, she was now crouched low, arms wrapped around herself, desperately trying to cover her exposed skin.

"But Linky said you were like Sam now." Leni responded, head tilted to one side in confusion. Her bewilderment was only compounded by the way Sam suddenly doubled over with laughter, pounding the table in front of her to punctuate her mirth.

Lincoln, for his part was desperately trying to look anywhere other than at his distressed sister, and doubly so to avoid thinking about the eyeful he'd caught. Lynn had always denied it, but it was something of an open secret that the sportiest Loud was dissatisfied with her lack of womanly curves, given how gifted their oldest sisters were in that regard. Mom always reassured her that Lynn was simply a late bloomer, and that she'd grow into them eventually. Apparently mom was starting to be proven right, he was pretty sure he'd have remembered those being there...

"Uh, Lincoln?" Carol asked, drawing the boy from his ruminations regarding his sister's pleasing form. Why hello Lori's...err, Carol's...gah!

"Lincoln?" She repeated, causing the boy's eyes to snap upward. "Maybe you should stop them before somebody gets hurt." She visibly flinched as the temperature in the room seemed to chill considerably, and five pairs of glowering eyes turned in her direction.

"Nobody asked you, Pingrey!" Luan growled

"Yeah!" Luna spat in agreement as she tended to Sam, who was currently convulsing on the floor. "Butt out, Carol!"

"Boobs!" Sam wheezed, as another round of giggles threatened to overtake her.

"You're blonde!" Shouted Leni, seemingly not entirely certain how this sort of thing worked.

Carol shrank in her seat a little, seemingly confused by the sentiment being thrown her way. Seeing this was enough to trigger Lincoln's protective instincts, snapping him out of haze.

"Knock it off, you guys!" He barked, surprising everyone at the table, himself included. A little of his indignation ebbed as he realized that all eyes were now on him.

"Carol's right." He continued. "If you guys are going to fight, do it in game. Everyone get back in your seats and grab some dice."

A hush fell upon the room, no words said, just the continued stares of his sisters and their friends. Lincoln began to worry that he might have overstepped his bounds with that little outburst. Finally, movement. Sam drunkenly climbed to her feet, and sat back down in her chair, hands neatly folded in front of her. Lincoln would have called it surprisingly well mannered of her, had it not been for the lusty wink she shot him. Such a tease, that one...

His other sisters began to follow suit, though he was worried to note that none of them were looking at Carol.

"Hey, Leni?" He called out, noticing that Lynn was struggling with the adjustments that had been made to her outfit. "Think you could help Lynn out?"

"Sure thing, Linky." She chirped. Leni grabbed Lynn's leotard by the lore bits she'd torn off, and began to work her special brand of Leni magic. A few moments later, she'd managed to tie the frayed bits of cloth into a quaint little bow, which could hold the garb together without Lynn's assistance. It did...uh, draw attention specifically to the affected area, a fact that Lynn herself seemed very much aware of, given the embarrassment she was clearly fighting down. Boy, they weren't all that big, especially given the company they were in, but there was definitely more of Lynn than he'd remembered there being...

"O-okay then." He announced, once order had been restored. "Game on."

"Alright. So we've got supersized Strong Suit and Card Sharp standing across from one another—"

"I charge straight at her!" Declared Lynn, snatching up her dice and learning forward in eager anticipation of the coming melee.

Lincoln gave Lynn an exasperated look. "—With the remainder of the Full House Gang caught between the two of you. Is what I was going to say, before you cut me off." He looked towards the rest of the group. "So the rest of you only have scant seconds to react to the giantess thundering straight at you. Everyone give me an agility check to see if you can dive out of the way."

"Sorry guys." Lynn said sheepishly in response to the dirty looks thrown her way.

Lincoln looked around, checking the results of the rolls. "Looks like you guys, are more or less fine. Luan and Lucy, you both makes it by the skin of your teeth, knock off 3 hit points a piece for the less than graceful tumbles you're required to take to avoid getting flattened. And...oof." He winced "Luna, that's not going to cut it. But tell you what, I'll give it to you if you burn some jetpack fuel and take...lets say 10 damage for the emergency landing."

Luna tersely nodded before making the required adjustments to her character, grumbling underneath her breath.

"Sam." Lincoln turned to address the blonde. "You've get one action before the new round starts, then it comes down to initiative. Better make it count."

Sam tapped her chin thoughtfully. "I said I was being very selective about what I destroyed. Any buildings still intact immediately around me? Say...something tall enough I could use as a weapon."

"Why yes, Sam." Lincoln replied, his lips twitching as an amusing idea came to mind. "The 'Fashions, Fashions, and More Fashions' boutique happens to be within grabbing distance."

"Oooh." Leni pipped up, suddenly interested. "Sam! See what the sales are like!"

"The building was designed to resemble a light house, and you could conceivably use it like a club." Lincoln continued.

"Done." Sam slapped her hand on the table. "I rip that bad boy right out of the ground and get into a batter's stance."

"What?" Leni's eyes widened in shock. "Sam, no! The fashions!"

"Top of the round. Initiative, ladies." The second the words left his lips, a pair of 20-sided dice shot towards the center of the table. One cyan, one red. Both girls leaned forward , waiting with baited breath as the polyhedrons rolled to a stop.

"Sam." Lincoln announced.

"Batter up!" Sam cackled, retrieving her spent die and filling her hand once more before launching her latest attack.

"Wow. Critical hit." Lincoln declared. "Card Sharp pegs Strong Suit right in the face with her improvised weapon, knocking her a ways back down the street." He paused for a moment to consider the situation. "But the sheer force of your blow obliterated the boutique. It basically disintegrates in your hands. What inventory survived the g-forces at work, now scattered to the wind. You can make out a number of scarves, and a delightful selection of hats, all drifting listlessly to the rubble strewn ground."

Leni made a noise not unlike a drowning fish, and fell out of her chair. Lincoln crouched down behind his screen, hoping nobody would see his sniggering. He felt a little bad doing that to Leni, but it was too funny not to. He'd make it up to her later."

"How do you like them apples?!" Sam crowed in triumph.

"Lucky shot!" Lynn spat, seething with anger.

"Lincoln!" She addressed her little brother. "As soon as I recover from that, I'm gonna grab some of those cars you said were around, and huck em like improvised shuriken!"

"Err—"

"Well then I'm gonna charge you down and stomp you right into the pavement!"

"Um—"

"You can try! But then I'll just use a reverse take-down to turn the tables on you! Then I'll grab you by that stupid hair of yours and—"

"Guys! Calm down!" Lincoln shouted, throwing his hands out to forestall any further declarations. "That's like, four combat rounds worth of actions, and we haven't even resolved this whole other thing we've got going on." He gestured to Carol and the rest of the girls, who were looking very nonplussed at the rampant scene stealing the pair had committed. Sam and Lynn, to their credit, seemed chagrined now that their conduct had been pointed out to them.

"I didn't think we were going to end up with a full blown kaiju fight." He groaned in exasperation, completely ignorant to the perplexed glances and shrugs that briefly circulated around the rest of the table's inhabitants. "Lynn's little stunt made this thing way more complicated that it already was."

"Perhaps I can be of assistance." Intoned a familiar voice.

Lincoln started to glance upward, towards the air vent overlooking the table, when to his surprise, Maggie instead slid out from under the table. She did not crawl out from under the table, the effect was more akin to when one slides an envelope under the door. The girl simply slid along the ground, as if gently pushed by unseen hands, gradually straightening up as she did so, despite no visible exertion being demonstrated on her part. Lincoln glanced to Lucy in askance, who's only response was a bewildered shrug.

"...Hello, Maggie." He cautiously greeted her.

"Hello, Lincoln." She replied, smiling wanly at him and nodding courteously to the rest of the table.

He waited for her to elaborate, but she simply stood there. Looming, like an especially curvaceous coat rack.

"You had some kind of suggestion?" He prompted.

"I did." She nodded. "I will assist you."

Lincoln frowned, perplexed. "How so."

"You clearly prepared for the battle between the Full House Gang and the Trump Card, as they are the conflict most central to the narrative you appear to be pursuing. As such, I will offer my services as an assistant game master, and referee the Strong Suit and Card Sharp fight."

Lincoln blinked in surprise. That was a lot of words to come out of Maggie all at once. But more than that, it was a surprisingly rational solution she was proposing. There was only one, niggling problem.

"Do you actually know how to play this game?" He asked, warily.

"You have been studying the rules intensely in preparation for today." She replied.

"That doesn't actually answer my—"

"Lynn, Sam. Come along." She ordered, her voice brooked no room for argument. The girls in question shrugged and picked up their stuff, relocating to the far end of the table.

Lincoln and his remaining players glanced between one another.

"I guess this is how we're doing things." He concluded. "I mean, how bad could it be?"

"Lincoln!" Maggie called "Ace Savvy is now suffering from severe blood loss. Also, he may be suffocating."