War is Calming

I spend a few minutes readjusting myself after my encounter with bitch-olo-cock and clean myself up. That eye doesn't pop up in my vision anymore, I assume because the attack she used has worn off. Forgive me for the second rate villain line, but she will pay for her transgressions!

Sorry, I had to.

Anyways, having realized my own weakness on a dimensional scale, I feel the need to double my efforts of gaining strength. I'll be absorbing more galaxies as time goes on. I still have that full feeling from absorbing that one galaxy, but I can feel it steadily disappearing. I don't want to risk my soul popping or something. Based on people's reactions to me splitting their souls, it doesn't seem pleasant.

For today, however, I plan on relaxing. My body is sore after feeling that pressure being placed on me. So, today will be a day filled with fun.

I walk to the corner of my room with a fireplace and sit down on the couch. I then use magic to create a miniature galaxy that covers an area of 2.5 meters in my room. I place several different species on planets at different corners of the galaxy and speed time up as they advance. The first to reach the space age is a species of lithoids, or living rocks. They utilize gigantic living rock formations that are capable of FTL travel. The planets they choose to live on are relatively lifeless rocky ones.

I decided to name this species Golems for obvious reasons. They use crystals as their methods for defense and attack. Instead of a shielding technology, they have laser-deflecting and missile homing crystals, capable of withstanding the attack of a 50 megaton bomb. Though, they are relatively peaceful. Their sedentary nature also makes them isolationists, only colonizing planets when needed.

The next species is a sentient species of plant, using a highly advanced solar wind technology. I nod my head as I see them advancing. The first thing they did was start creating something I can only call a dyson sphere around their star. This dyson sphere however is used as both a generator and a home. Their entire species moves from their home planet to this dyson sphere. I assume this is to be closer to the star to absorb more energy. This species is also rather sedentary, and lacks any significant form of offense. They use a spore that travels at around 10x the speed of sound, still incredibly slow when their enemies have lasers that can hit them in a literal split second.

I've named them the Venus, after the fly trap heh.

The next species is humanoid, being descendants of apes. They are taller than humanity, as their planet has lower gravity. They aren't quite as warlike as the humanity I know, but they still float more towards that side. They reach space the same way humans did, through a space race between rival countries. This time, however, something similar to the communists won. Immediately, they created an orbital weapon and used this to strong arm their world into surrendering. This caused a massive world war that reduced their planet to a nuclear winter and stunted their growth for a while. However, they kept putting effort into creating a ship to travel to the next star system, as I had placed one world perfect for them in it. After colonizing this world, they moved the majority of their species there and formed into an empire, ruled by a dynasty.

I've named them Hoomans. After what I assume dogs refer to people as.

The next species is a race of beautiful humanoids. They have skin colors ranging from pink to blue to purple, and even the males are feminine by human standards. This race is incredibly artistic, creating masterpieces with every attempt made. They develop space travel for one purpose, to paint a planet. They colonize several planets near them in an unending quest for finding the perfect canvas, which just so happens to be the golem's homeworld. They are also rather hedonistic, having had no major wars and instead solving things with massive orgies. I mean, to be fair, if everything around me looked that beautiful, I'd probably be down for some fun as well. Fuck it, I'll join one of their orgies one day. Can't stay a virgin borb forever.

I've named them Beaumans. Beautiful humans. Original, I know.

The last, and possibly scariest race, is a species of humanoid insects. They are incredibly warlike and are racist, xenophobic bastards who want to destroy anything that isn't their species. They are the last to develop space travel due to the fact that they're always fighting. When they do, their species breaks off into several different factions who vie for control over their little pocket of the galaxy. Their ships are constructed of concrete for some reason.

I've named them the Malformed. Mainly because they're fucking disgusting and I hate them.

Alright, my little game of cosmic battle royale has started. The species that survives, unless it's the malformed, shall be welcomed into the secondary galaxy in my realm. The first two species to meet… Is the Hoomans and the Malformed… Oh this is going to be interesting.

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AN: yeh she playin stellaris. i figured i would give a few chaps for sera to unwind after dat bish.

daddy dearest, may i request for thy to put thine stones down mine gullet?

heads up, i still upload at least once a day on pat.reon! if you wanna get access to chapters early, as well as vote on stuff, the link is https://www.pat.reon.com/sorrestwriting (delete the .)