OH SHIT

There is something unique that happens when you die. In your last moment, maybe with loved ones in a hospital. Or, like in my case mushed against a concrete light pole because apparently balding tires + high speed turning = car slipping into an immovable object. The last thing I notice as I see as the light at the end of the tunnel begins to pull me in, is that I shit myself. Oh fu-

I've taken acid before and let me tell you something, what I can only assume is the space and highway between worlds makes the feeling of what you believe is a xeno-porcupine crawling thru your head while your teeth are being curled up like a fruit roll up, well bad trips aside, the emptiness makes the bad acid trips feel like paradise. The semi-awareness of what I can only assume is my soul, as I accidentally ditched my meatbag suit after it turned into chunky salsa, could "see" the horrors that HP Lovecraft dreamed about in the back of his messed up head. BUT NOW I'M FREE. 

Well, kinda. I have a body again, fully alive and human as far as I can tell. After 9 months of fading in and out of consciousness as my soul began to 'fit' itself in the body I got. A fascinating experience. Especially since I am a single day old and I can hear and see n'shit. I'm pretty sure that kids aren't supposed to be able to do this so soon after birth but oh well.

It took me about a week to determine that I'm not in Kansas anymore. Oh sure it looks like a feudal asian culture on dictator steroids as everyone looks armed to the teeth but what really made it click is when my dad kinda just disappeared in front of me. Like supernatural shit and not a ninja where's the baby.

Teleportation, huh. I know it's kinda hypocritical as I'm a grown man that died and reincarnated but I kinda was suppressing that. 

You know. It does seem kinda familiar. I've had a lot of dejavu since I was carried around by my mom. I mean it's not often you see such striking red hair. But I did get my dads blond locks from what I could see.

What is it they keep calling me? Musuko, I think that means kid or something though. I mean the only other word they say in reference to me is Naruto. But I know damn well that is a ramen topping. I mean I can think back to my previous life I watch the annoying blond kid who screamed about ramen… and being hokage… oh…. OH SHIT.