Chapter 30 Yellow Hoodie

Jamie's POV

We all looked at her in shock. Was she planning another suicide attempt? "What?" Amy said

"It's a revised version of my old suicide notes"

"Why are you writing that??" Amy said but she didn't answer.

"Hey Jamie make sure you shut the door on your way out"

I looked and Amy and Avery were just as confused as me. Me and Avery walked out while Amy stayed in there to watch her.

"What do we do?" I asked

"I don't know, I've never seen her like this"

"Should we call her therapist?"

"I don't know, what time is it?"

"It's 9 o'clock"

"It's kind of late to call her therapist, we should call in the morning and just keep a close eye on her until then"

"Okay"

Just then we heard Amy calling for us in their room. When we went in there. Scarlett had finished writing and was now looking outside at the full moon.

"I don't know why I called you guys she just stopped writing"

"No it's ok" Avery said

"Scarlett?"

"Why did you guys have mom's funeral without me?"

Avery's POV

"I- I don't know. We thought you wouldn't wanna see her, we thought it'd make you feel worse since you were already in the hospital"

"That wasn't your decision to make"

"I know I'm sorry"

She took off her jacket and stared at her arms which were still covered in bandages. I wish I could tell you what she was thinking but I have no idea.

"Would you guys be mad if I died?"

Please don't tell me she's thinking about trying to kill herself again. "We'd be very sad" Amy said.

"Ok. Then I won't"

That's relieving, we stood there for a minute in silence. "I'm still mad at you two, but could you not hover over me for like a day?"

"We don't hover over you" I said

"Actually you guys kinda do babe"

I thought for a minute and I guess he's right. "Fine, but if I get even a suspension your up to something, I'll be stalking you like a hawk"

"Dramatic much?"

I sighed and me and Jamie headed to our room while Amy stayed with Scarlett.

************

Scarlett's POV

Today is Saturday. The rest of the week went a little better than the first day. On the second day I saw Matt and Stacy so I wasn't alone. And by Friday I was starting to get used to the whispers and comments.

"Wake up you too, we're going shopping today"

"Okay" Amy said. She's already been awake for like an hour reading.

"But I don't wanna" I said

"To bad, I'm not asking I'm telling you your going so get up" she came over and pulled me up so I was sitting up facing her.

"Why can't I stay home?"

"You know why"

"Can't you just call Luna?"

"She's busy, now get up sleepy head. Breakfast is ready so both of you get dressed and come eat"

She left and I sighed. I'm exhausted and I don't feel like going anywhere, it's Saturday for crying out loud.

"Come on Scar, get dressed so we can go" Amy said.

"Ughhhhh"

I got up and looked through my draws. "You've gotta be kidding me"

"What?"

"All my long sleeves and jackets are in the washing machine. I'll be damned if I'm going out in short sleeves"

"It is a warm day, it's 80 degrees outside"

"I don't wanna deal with peoples stares"

I put on some sweat pants and a short sleeved shirt and headed out to complain to Avery.

"I don't have any long sleeves"

"What? are they all washing?"

"Yeah. I can't go out looking like this" I raised my arms which were still bandaged.

"Just put on one of Amy's"

"I can't, her entire wardrobe consists of bright sparkly colors"

"Either put one on or stop complaining"

Ugh. So I either wear a highlighter, or I walk around with these bandages out.

"Can't I wear one of yours?"

"Scarlett mine are way to big for you"

I walk back into our room and asked Amy for her dullest colored hoodie. She looked through her draws for a minute before handing me this baby yellow hoodie that had a sun with a smiley face on it and it said time to shine.

"That's your dullest hoodie??"

"Yeah. I like color, all my other ones are like bright blues and pinks"

I sigh and put it on and look at myself. The hoodie goes down to my knees and I'm basically drowning in it not to mention the style on it.

"This is gonna be a long day"

I walk out and Avery and Jamie immediately stare at me. I could tell they were holding back their laughs, I look like a 3 year old.

"Don't laugh."

Amy came out from behind me. "That's the dullest hoodie I have"

"This blows" I said as I sat down in the kitchen. I look at what's been made deciding what to eat. Bacon, eggs, pancakes, and grits. I think I'll go with the eggs.

I grab a plate and put a spoonful of eggs into my plate and begin trying to eat it. I'm trying to ignore all the thoughts in my head telling me I'm gonna become fat by eating this. That it's poison and I'll die from eating it.

I manage to get it all down which wasn't much and Avery gave me my meds and I took them, after all that we were ready to go.

**************

In The Car

"What are we even picking up?" I said

"Groceries"

"Can we get some wine?" I asked as a joke but I already know they took it seriously.

"One no. Two we're not old enough and three why do you wanna get wine?"

"I know a guy, and you guys need to loosen up. Your all so uptight all the time"

"Wait you know a guy that sells alcohol to underaged kids?" Amy said

"Scarlett I don't wanna know, and we're not getting any alcohol"

"Fine."

We drive a bit more until we get to the store.

"I feel like an idiot wearing this"

"Would you relax, no one cares your wearing that"

Just then we go around the corner and Stacy is there.

"You've gotta be kidding me"

"Oh hey Scar!"

"Hey Stacy"

She stopped and looked at me for a moment before smiling.

"You wearing something that isn't dull or depressing. That's a surprise!" She said with a huge smile on her face.

"It's not mine, all my long sleeves shirts and hoodies are washing so I needed to borrow it"

"You look adorable"

"So what are you doing here?"

"I'm picking up groceries. Matt's here too, I just ran into him"

Matt's here? Of course he is, the one day I'm wearing something as ridiculous as this.

"Oh hey Scarlett" I heard a voice say from behind me. It was Matt's voice. I could feel my face heat up as I turned around to say hi.

"Hey Matt"

I could see Avery giving me a certain look from across the isle. It was the don't do anything we're in a store kinda look. I ignored her because she's being dramatic. I walked over to Matt and gave him a big hug. He smells like lavender I thought to myself.

He smiled and asked "what's this for?"

"Everything"

He hugged back and I looked into his eyes for awhile before I could physically feel my sisters staring at me.

"Their staring at us aren't they?"

"Yep, kinda scary actually"

I smiled and gave him a kiss. I ruffled his hair and started walking away. "Cya at school!"

"Cya Scar"

Then he and Stacy disappeared into different isles.

"Oh my god would you guys stop staring at me?"

They didn't say anything instead just kinda nodded and we kept walking.

*************

The Car Ride Home

"So you really like him?" Amy asked me.

"Matt? Of course. He saved my life"

"I know it's just...."

"Just what?"

I looked at her and she looked at me concerned. What could it possibly be this time.

"Isn't he an alcoholic? And isn't his dad in jail?"

"One, I'm an alcoholic, two Matt is a very sweet drunk, he nicer drunk than sober sometimes. Three both our parents are dead, are you really gonna judge him because his dads in jail?"

"But your trying to get better, you shouldn't be hanging out with people who have the same problems as you"

Is she serious right now. Then Avery cut in and said "I agree with Amy on this one Scar. I know he makes you happy but shouldn't you focus on trying to get better?"

Ok now I'm mad. "Are you both serious right now?!? Matt makes me feel loved and wanted and good all around. He's a good boyfriend in all aspects. No ones perfect, we all have our problems, would you two leave this alone please!?"

"I know he's a good kid but he might drag you down with him. You just don't know Scar"

"Can't you guys just let me be happy for once"

"We want you to be happy, but we also want you to be healthy as well. And being around Matt isn't. Maybe as a friend at school but not as a boyfriend"

I'm done listening to them at this point and I just stare out the window till we get home.

*********

We got home and the second I got in I took off that ridiculous hoodie. I went to the sink and unwrapped my bandages.

"What are you doing?" Avery said rushing over toward me.

"Would you relax? I'm taking off these bandages, I don't need them anymore"

"Hold on, let me see"

She unwraps the rest of my bandages and looked at my cuts. After about a minute she said ok and that I didn't need to wear the bandages anymore. "Finally, arm freedom" and it'll be easier to cut if I need to.

"Please if you feel like cutting just talk to one of us" Avery said

"Yeah yeah"

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Hope you guys enjoyed this one and I'll see you next chapter🙃

Also I should warn you the next chapter is a serious topic ( I say that as if this whole story isn't a serious topic) but no really though, there's mentions of kind of descriptive sexual assault. If your triggered by that skip ahead to the chapter 33.